Cults are set up to seduce people into feeling loved, that's what get's them hooked. They tolerate the abuse because they can't do without the love and approval. Ironic really, talk about swinging on the pendulum!
Outward, excessive shows of physical affection and 'we love you's ' are pure unadulterated horse-shit. If your teacher tells you he loves you know you are screwed....The correct term is love-bombing.
That's right, love's opposite is lust. He has completely brainwashend his people into believing his bullshit. It's so absurd its even remotely funny! American cult culture, unbelievable...
And for anyone looking for his email address, it's james@solidrockvista.com, since he has forgotten to put in a contact form on his site, we feel we should help out and give the world that info. Feel free to write to him, and contribute to his narcissistic supply. He appreciates it.
We liked your last essay James! http://www.solidrockvista.com/Site/Thoughts/service-september-19-2011.html
Funny how he always seem to be covering his ass when it comes to us and this site. Shouldn't you be practicing 'non-identification', 'Separation'? Which I told you to write that essay James? One of those nasty revengeful I's?
He writes: ...She told me some of the latest statistics concerning customer service. Before the internet, one unhappy customer would spread their negative perspective to one hundred people. Since the internet they estimate the number to be closer to one thousand. The other thing she learned is that satisfied customers tend to tell no one, proving valid what English philosopher, Edmund Burke said, The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.... Excellent writing James, really good sounding words, you never cease to amaze us with your wit and superior understanding. It's a good thing we can reach 1000 people with our site, we hope much much more of course. The thing is, James is the biggest backstabber of all time. He talks about everyone to everyone, everything you tell him is subject to public consumption. He told us how horrible his wife was, we only knew him 2 weeks then. He would swear at her. He talked about his right hand man being a 'fag' and how he thought it was disgusting (and then later accused others of being homophobic). He talked about how his followers were never going to get anywhere, how they were doomed to stay where they are and be dependent on him forever. He talked of their abusive behaviour to him, how they didn't appreciate what he did, how they didn't do what they were supposed to do, Steve never came through on his promises, others wouldn't meditate, bla bla bla the list is endless. The point is that he is a gossip, spreading old wives tales amongst his supporters, setting them up against each other, classic divide and conquer policy. And if all else fails, he goes for the trump card. The "i'm a victim and everyone abuses me" card, which seems to work very well! Well done James, you are not as stupid as we thought, BUT you will fall. Evil cannot succeed, you will eventually have to come to terms with the shit you've pulled in this life or the next. There is always God's mercy. Oh wait! I forgot, God talks to you directly and Jesus appears to you every Easter. Well, then in that case, you should be just fine. Go ahead and screw around on your wife all you want manipulate the innocent and naive, it's ok, you're above God's Law...
Oh did I mention, he told one of his 'victims' he was once accused of being a pedophile. Hmmm. Gives you something to think about. Keep your kids away, just in case....
James has never left the circle of abuse he encountered as a child, in the end everything leads back to this, his manipulation of others and how sees the world abusing him, it's all wrapped up in his own self-percepotion he developed as a child in an abusive situation. It's extremely sad, very very upsetting to realize what caused this whole string of events. But, nevertheless it is so. He too is a victim, but he also knows what he is doing. He does have the power to release himself but he chooses to carry on the same suffering he was inflicted as a boy, the talk of Stockholm syndrome, the self-pity, the accusations of manipulation, the betrayal, all the things he accuses other people of, these are the things he does himself. He knows he does this, but he really can't help himself. He believes his own bullshit but knows he plays people, ,and is very capable of playing certain kinds of people. He had a long training and he fought himself out of a terrible situation and has all the tools to go. We normal people can't understand the kind of manipulation he inflicts because it's beyond our understanding, that someone would actually do this to another human being. It's only when you are out do you actually start seeing what really went on, and some people never will see it, why that is, I really don't know. Maybe they choose not to, maybe they just can't see it because he convinces them otherwise.
He's just an old man who plays people and gets away with it because it's all so small scale.
It's a huge puzzle, one we may never understand. I personally believe I have gained some important experience from all this. I hope others will too.
Interesting remark about the triumph of evil is when good people do nothing. It occurred to me that the same principle applies to James' followers . Even if you are not actively participating in adultery, manipulation, and so on, you still condone or even approve his actions. By doing so you are his accomplices and therefore accountable. Every time he humiliates , invades, psychologically rapes or screws around . In fact, you actually pay him to do so. You pay him with your money and your spiritual currency. And he always talks shit about his pupils.
Solid Rock logic: treat you like shit in the name of truth and love. When you turn negative about it, it's then YOUR fault for being negative. You should be happy about hearing "the truth" and "being loved" because now you have a chance to "work". Isn't it great??? Not.
So very twisted and yet enticing at the same time because the ideas certainly tickle your ears. The ideas are the bait. Unfortunately sometimes the ideas are correct, so it becomes difficult to discern what is really truth from what is abuse. If the ideas were wrong 100% of the time, this would be easy to see and walk away from. But there's just enough real truth to make you wonder, and to make you doubt yourself.
As quoted on James' new site: The driving force behind his enthusiasm is, "Freely you have received, freely give." That's so nicely put but is toal bullshit in this case. Because James does not give freely. He SAYS he gives freely, but what he does and says are completely different things. He also says " I deserve to be paid for all the work I do". But this is inconsistent with his 'principes'. Are you giving unconditionally or not. And what about those times he passed a hat around to collect money from his followers? WHAT is that all about?? True spiritual leaders (don't take my word for it, look it up) have so much faith in God that they give their knowledge for free and don't ACCEPT payment because the true reward lies in saving humanity as much as they can.
Of course James denies being a spiritual teacher when it suits him and when it's conveniënt to be the spiritual teacher he'll accept the hand outs: All expenses paid and 10% tithes. He SAYS he doesn't ask for money but on the other hand he COMPLAINS people don't appreciate his work and that he should be paid. It's so pathetic I don't see why his people fall for it.
"He is the hero, and when it comes time to face an ultimatum from the more conscious spouse, the spouse in the villain to his target and he takes the wife or continues to shit on the husband- whichever is his mark for the time-being.
James is prone to magical thinking. He thinks about himself in terms of ‘being chosen’ or of ‘having a destiny’. …He believes that his life is of such momentous importance, that it is micro-managed by God. …In short, narcissism and religion go well together, because religion allows the narcissist to feel unique.
James is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends;
He will not hesitate to put people’s lives or fortunes at risk. He will preserve his sense of infallibility in the face of his mistakes and misjudgments by distorting the facts, by evoking mitigating or attenuating circumstances, by repressing the memories, or simply lying....
Using complex defence mechanisms, such as projective identification, James forces his victims - spouse, mate, friend, colleague - to "play a role" assigned to him by "God".
James rewards compliance with his script and punishes any deviation from it with severe psychological and verbal abuse.
In other words, the James the narcissist CONDITIONS people around him using intimidation, positive and negative reinforcements and feedback, ambient abuse ("gaslighting"), covert, or controlling abuse, and overt, classical abuse. He turns everything around using shadow projection.
James has created a cult like atmosphere: in this "cult" there is pressure to conform after manipulating your reality. You may find yourself doing things you normally wouldn't. Part of it is due to disinhibiting behaviour (desensitization, something he learned in EST). The rest is due to groupthink (simplistically speaking) and brainwashing and subtle forms of intimidation which include guilt-making and schunnig and public humiliation.
Anyone who, having been disoriented once, believes him, as he glibly throws some impressive concepts and 'facts' into the mix, becomes enthralled again to the totality of psychopathic distortion; they are misled and misdirected away from their inherent integrity and their strivings- their human uniqueness, and especially their very real suffering, deleted. He has no conception of humanity and no understanding of himself- he can only tell us what he wants himself to hear. Moreover, he enjoys pulling the wool over our eyes, this 'duping delight'. This is not even a question of hatred towards him. He is a psychopath, a common conman, and he thinks and acts like one. Totally.
So. Question, challenge, be aware, and beware the con.
As Mile once said to James about this blog: They give you too many credits. No Mile, you do not see who he is because he has distorted your reality and has shown you what he wants you to see.
The "modesty" displayed by James is false. It is mostly and merely verbal. It is couched in flourishing phrases, emphasised to absurdity, repeated unnecessarily – usually to the point of causing gross inconvenience to the listener. The real aim of his behaviour and its subtext are exactly the opposite of common modesty.
It is intended to either aggrandise him or to protect his grandiosity from scrutiny and possible erosion. Such modest outbursts precede inflated, grandiosity-laden statements made by James and pertaining to fields of human knowledge and activity in which he is sorely lacking.
He attempts to dazzle his surroundings with apparent "brilliance" and to put possible critics on the defence.
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse in which false information is presented to the victim with the intent of making them doubt their own memory and perception. It may simply be the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred, or it could be the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorienting the victim.
Watch out for this with James. He is a gaslighter.
You guys need to understand something about the people who are there long term: they are bound. That's why they can't leave. They say they WON'T leave, as if they had some choice, but they don't have choice because James it the savior, he's the only one who will help them, who will tell them the truth so they can develop. There is nobody else who will do this for them, NOBODY. So in a sense their very salvation is tied up with him in theier own minds.
James conducts polls periodically to make sure everybody is in line. At SR meetings James publically asks each person individually if they're still committed to him and/or the ideas. The person must give the correct answer for all to hear. Doubt is never expressed. To express doubt might mean that one is thinking about something other than the ideas or him.... and of course that should never be the case! One should never have thoughts other than him/the ideas, because to have other thoughts means one isn't developing.
Now that I've said this, and they've all read it, he'll conduct a poll asking if they've ever had doubt. Some may be honest saying they have. This honesty will not be overtly punished because now that I've shed light on this tactic, he can't punish the doubt, becasue it would prove me right. Or if he does punish it, it's in the form of telling them "the truth."
Remember the facade of freedom must be maintained at all costs. James is way more clever than any of us. No matter what we say or do here, he'll find a way to explain it all away, or dismiss us with the "they're being hateful" bs.
Yes, this makes so much sense and is exactly my experience of James. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. It's a huge eye opener. Do you think James is psychopathic / sociopathic? And why / how have these people been drawn in so badly. I know from my own experience how hard it was to get free and how much I believed HE really was the savior and without him I could not make it. Freeing myself from it was devastating, like being taken off the heroine and going through the full scala of withdrawal symptoms and doubt. I wanted to go back but KNEW there was something wrong. Why don't they see through his bullshit? It's so obvious when you are out, but I also know how incredibly plausible he makes it sound when you are in.
I hope you are ok and am grateful, very grateful for your feedback.
"Do you think James is psychopathic / sociopathic? And why / how have these people been drawn in so badly."
Thank you for your comments. I'm glad I could help. For me, trying to diagnose James is a waste of time. I don't know enough about the various possible disgnoses to even hazard a guess. Nor do I want to.
I believe severely codependent people are drawn to James. You can't be at SR if you're not codependent. Generally speaking, I would say that this is a characteristic of all cults.
Here's a good site that talks about codependency in families. It's not hard to see how it applies to SR.
Somebody posted a link about the chain and the baby elefant and I really liked that. I want to comment on it.
At this point in SRs evolution, the chain has been removed from the baby elephant, in fact it was removed many years ago. So there does appear to be freedom of course, and it's hard to prove that the people are forced to stay, and forced to put up with him. But notice in the story how the elefant doesn't leave after the chain is off. That's what we observe at SR.
Also it seems that much of the literature about cults refers to the stage when the chain is on, at least this is what I have noticed. Of course it's a psychological chain whether it's on or off, but when it's off the illusion of freedom is much larger.
However, there is a term for when the chain is off: Stockholm Syndrome.
He gives the illusion of freedom by telling people they are 'free' to leave. But on the other hand he also tells you you won't develop without him.
He did this very thing with me. He told me if I went back to my old life I would never develop and would stay asleep and only if I were to stay/live with him did I have any chance of development. This prospect is what kept me coming back but in the end I knew I needed to break free. The fear of having found salvation and then thinking you might have to give it up again is enormous. That's what happens to you psychologically and the fact that many people have the inclination to see the good in others and cannot believe anyone could be this evil.
I would say the psychological binding is much stronger now. Maybe in the beginning of SR he knew he had to bind people to him by force because of the financial aspect and now, 20 years on, they have become so emotionally and psychologically attached they cannot and will not leave. They too have started to believe the lie. He also plays the "I'm pitiful and have been abused game' when it suites him. He has very many faces ("I's") and tactics.
Like you said before, this man is very clever and has been playing this game for decades, he knows exactly how to keep people in line and make them feel guilty for wanting to leave, or worse they have indeed Stockholm syndrome that they don't want to.
It is very possible to have a brilliant mind, but at the same time a wicked and depraved will which is what James has. He is ingeniously veiled and has carefully surrounded himself with people entirely unlike himself, that is, with deeply empathic human beings who wish to please others, who are slow to judge, who are excessively tolerant and who have an eye for the good to be found in others. He has found a way how to exploit them to his own advantage such character traits. It is his association with such people that has helped him in perpetuating the facade and kept him from exposure all these years.
I understand too that my situation is different, it was only a little more over a year (of very close contact) in comparison to the 20 years you have been with him, I cannot begin to understand what you may have witnessed. What I witnessed and experienced was enough for a lifetime of trauma.
JAmes is very aware of the limits of human perspectives and that community has the power to enlarge individual points of view. When people talk with one another, they begin to acquire a much larger perspective on things, that is, they begin to see a bigger picture. James cannot afford to have people talking amongst themselves and sharing stories. So he will go to great lengths and carefully contrive very devious and underhanded schemes to keep people divided. He will sow division amongst his people by planting lies or strife about one person to another, and another about someone else. Divide and conquer, leaving him high and dry. THis is a successful strategy because no one expects an intelligent adult who they trust to be carrying on like a scheming eight year old child or an emotionally disturbed adolescent. And since most of us avoid confrontation, it is much easier to believe the liar.
He cannot allow others to see what he sees in himself, for they will reject him. What they see will be as repulsive to them as it is to himself. So he has had to create a highly likable and acceptable image that will procure the affirmation he requires for himself, an affirmation that he can only get from others who do not know him as he really is. Thus began the fundamental lie of James the self-loathing egotist. For an image is a reflection. One can only see a reflection if it is mirrored in some way. James must see his reflection through the eyes of others, and so others become a means to his own affirmation, a means to his own conviction that he really exists. For the deeply (morally) depraved have created a void, a nothingness in the heart of their character. But a person cannot detect the presence of nothingness. Hence, he desperately needs to be convinced of his own existence. He needs to feel that he is. If he will not achieve this through the pursuit of virtue, he will do so through the affirmation, praise, and adulation of others, or through their fear of him or the fear of losing his 'greatness'. But what others affirm (or fear) is not James' true self. He cannot show his true self, for he does not know who or what it is. His true self is fractured, dilapidated, and in pieces. Thus, it is only a reflection that they affirm.
Narcissists use everyone around them to keep themselves inflated. James does this. Often he finds flaws in others and criticize them fiercely, for this further distinguishes him from those who are defective. He uses the doctrine of the 4th way to justify his abuse and will say things like "You do want to know the truth don't you?" and he will carry on to swear at them (if you object he says you are identified with the word and it's just a word!). Yes we do want to know the truth. This is the catch. We really would appreciate a teacher telling us what we cannot clearly see about ourselves, but in the case of James he does it not for us but for himself. He will stand and abuse his followers and they won't blink an eye. Completely conditioned to accept the abuse because they believe it must be good for them. It's not good for you, it's good for James and makes him feel good about himself, superior, it fills his emptiness.
His spouse receives similar treatment--she exists to admire James and to remain in the background as an adornment. James uses his wife's goodness and she accepts his abuse. Frequently, she is subject to the same barrage of criticism and abuse. This can never be effectively countered, because any assertive defense is a threat to James' wounded "self." and he will accuse her of being negative, being hateful, not wanting to work etc etc the bs is endless. In public however he will pretend he deserves her abuse killing two birds with one stone, making it appear to the outside world that she is the abuser and at the same time appearing incerdibly humble. This is exactly what we were made to believe, that he has been abused by his wife for years and he is the sad little boy that must endure it for his spiritual growth. It's total bullshit.
Not surprisingly, James cannot hear others: spouse, lover, or friends when they have criticism only when they offer adulation will he 'love' them. He is interested in listening only to the extent that it allows him the opportunity to give advice.
He's an evil man, he knows how to play people. He played everyone I ever saw him talk to. If you confront him you will get the full brunt of his Jekyl and Hyde personality.
All true. Just because his web of deceit and lies is complicated and has layers, the solution doesn't have to be. He's a giant mistake, the biggest one you'll ever make. He has himself surrounded by good people. Spiritual potential. Think of this effort, this work, as something coming from deep within yourselves. As a dorment force, waiting to be awoken. This does not belong to another person and it cannot be cultivated, it just is and ultimately comes from God. The fourth way is one of many ways to get closer to it, to get in touch. It focuses on getting rid of redundant material in thought form, rituals, mechanical behavior. Now, the one thing you are NOT doing is non-identification . You are completely identified with one man who tells you what to think and you all want to be his favorite pupil. This as far away from spirituality as you will ever get. And your personalities are damaged and slowly erased as you advance along this path. But of course, your inherent characteristic to see the good in others makes you blind to this, because James cannot be that evil and wicked. The leverage to keep going aside from this is the huge investments you all have made. And there is the constant fear of dropping out; either do as I say or you're out , doomed to fall back asleep. Is that plausible??? Drop out and wake up, that's more likely is it not?
The investment is lost, but the stocks in solid rock were worthless to begin with. It is a school of lies, keeping its pupils in a mild trance based on the illusion of enlightenment . Have you learned compassion, modesty, virtue, kindness? Or is it fear, anarchy, disappointment, moral decay, perversity, loss of control? Think about this carefully. It will take time and some of you will choose to turn a blind eye. So the key to the solution lies in that you look at it. Look at him, yourself, the other members of the group. Step outside yourself and observe. Unbiased by the false adoration. Your spiritual development does not belong to James , he's merely a Collector. The Collector is an empty shell that harnesses a cold void. It collects souls, who get trapped at this plane, somewhat like Purgatory.
"If you really believe that leaving the group equals leaving God (or means you are leaving your only chance to succeed in life), then you will obey the cult leaders even when you disagree with them instead of risking being kicked out of the group. Exclusivism is used as a threat, it controls your behavior through fear."
This is a very good point. James does this. He implies that without him there is no hope, no God, no chance of development. He's clever enough not to make it sound like you HAVE to stay because that would sound like a cult, but it is insinuated at a very deep level. He will tell you that you will go back to sleep and then add "but that's ok, if you want to be sleep, fine, I'm not stopping you ". And more of that kind of manipulative bullshit. There IS life without James. a better more fulfilling life. You cannot see that now, but if you objectively looked at the facts you would see he has you bound and you are too scared to fight back for your freedom.
A parent who loves his child does not keep them attached to the homestead. A parent wants his child to go out and be independent, to learn for himself, to make real mistakes. James is keeping you, like a selfish parent who thinks only of himself, promising you freedom that you will never get, keeping you bound to take care of HIM to pay for him and his needs. He IS abusing you.
God does not work this way, nor do real teachers. They are concerned for your spiritual welfare. They free you for your own good.
In James' last email to me he said he was not a teacher and had never claimed to be one. First of all thats a huge contradiction, because he has said so often he was a teacher and secondly, he acts like he is a teacher with all his teaching trips and thirdly what have SR been paying you for if you haven't been teaching? An advisor or counsellor is also a teacher. You tell people how to run their lives, to take their kids out of school and homeschool them, to meditate, and bring you the things you need. What would you call it?
It's such a disturbing set of events, now that it is blatantly obvious what is going on and all the other perverted things he has told me that went on in the group over the years.
You know, I'd love to put it all out there, for everyone to see, so that everyone knows how evil he is. The only thing stopping me is the fact that I still believe the people in the group have been dragged down by him and that exposing him would be damaging to them too. Any sane person could see that what he is doing is wrong and evil. Just because HE says we don't understand doesn't mean it's actually true.
yep its a double bind for sure. how can they leave sr if leaving means they are not "working" aka not spiritual, not seeking enligtenment, not doing what God wants, ect? the last one especially is a doozie. people do many evil things in the name of God. people are willing to kill each other in the name of God, which really means i'm right and you're wrong so you deserve to die. i am always suspect when somebody wants to take extreme actions in the name of god. it's so easy to be deceived about what God wants because it appeals to our desire to be right, hey if god is on our side then it doesn't get much better than that because it means we are as right as we can ever hope to be, a dream come true.
i do not believe god wants us to hurt each other. i also do not believe god tests our loyalty to him the way it is covertly taught at sr. in other words, loyalty to james means loyalty to god, at all cost, including family. loyalty to james means loyaly to god means i'm right means i'm safe and good.
If it was a pure love for God it would be different. But it's not. It's been contaminated with filth. Pure love for God would entail a different path, not one of abuse and dependence, tithing, sexual perversions etc etc etc. Their loyalty is not to God, but to James. In fact it has nothing to do with God, it's an insult to God, to have people be treated the way they are by this man who speaks to the world in His name. There are such things as false prophets and when times become confusing, like our time now, people become seekers. The more seekers, the more false prophets. They will hinder your development and stop you from being a higher being. James is doing this to you in so many way at so many levels. He really is at the hands of negative forces destroying mankind! He used to laugh at this, but nothing is truer. And such things exist. If you deny the existence of evil (as does James) and sin then there can be no hope, what he practices is anti-doctrine. These interpretations of doctrine have been fabricated to relieve people of guilt and responsibility. As long as you have 'fun' and a 'good' life then you are ok.
James practices these doctrine. His life is pleasure driven: money, women, gadgets and games and most of all manipulating others for his own enjoyment.
As long as you stay with him you cannot develop properly. Ask yourselves what good his ideas have brought you?
its such a house of mirrors, & once you're in its very hard to find your way out. i know the people have doubts, but they just shove them down. doubt is always painted as not working, not committed to truth, etc... also to leave is to acknowledge that the others who left were right... and this is hard to do since so much has already been invested both in time and money. leaving could mean that all that time & money was wasted... and this would be a hard pill to swallow. at this point its much easier to take the chance that james is right. not only that but just think how strong & spiritual they get to feel... they held on while others didnt.
nothing we say here will change their minds. they would need outside input they could trust for that to happen... and such a thing doesnt exist. it can't exist. all data must support the conslusions already drawn. any data that doesnt support the conclusion is rejected.
As I was on the verge of leaving everything for James, something stopped me. IT had stopped me before. Something was wrong. All his reasoning wasn't working: He said children were better off in the hands of God and that we were meant to be together, he said 'this is an opportunity', and 'don't drop the ball', and if I didn't do this someone would take my place. He would find another woman since he was entitled to some happiness. He said that my window of opportunity was closing and that I would fall asleep, a deep deep sleep and I would not make it if I didn't leave my family (preferably my kids too) to be with him. He was careful to disguise his words so that if I confronted him directly on what he was implying, he would say that was not what he meant and I was twisting his words.
THis was how most of our communication transpired. Never straightforward, always convoluted and twisted. I thought I did not have the capabilities to understand his genius, he even said this in so many words. But it wasn't that. I really DID try hard to understand, but there is no understanding a liar. He is a liar. He twists and turns and if you pester him with too many questions he turns on you and says you are abusing him. Abusing him? The mere sounding of those words makes me nauseous. How could I have not seen earlier? I did. I knew very early on, but my desire to believe that I had met the most profound man on earth overwhelmed my sense of truth. I was blinded by charisma and lies. Much of what he told me was lies. His stories are full of holes and inconsistencies.
For a year I tried to believe him, but something inside did not agree with how my mind was working out a way to be with him. He had come between me and my husband by turning us on each other. From the very beginning he used the information we gave him to divide us. On the very first occasion he spoke to us on Skype he told my husband to tell me to 'fuck off'. That's where it all started. Something as trivial as this. But the seed for destruction had been planted. My husband never spoke to me this way. James had gotten to both of us.
The grief of what has happened is impossible to fathom. I can't begin to explain how it feels to have your family destroyed. How I almost gave up my kids. THe thought of having been so close is suffocating.
I need to share this experience. It in only surfacing now. THe trauma of what he did to us is still resonating deep throughout our family and friends.
The feelings of love for the abuser are actually part of an emotional defense mechanism, as opposed to real love that exists in a healthy relationship. This emotional bonding is a survival strategy for victims of abuse and intimidation, though they are not fully aware of it happening. Connie knows all this about him, she knows who he is and what he does but she can't let go. We've seen and heard her say to him what we have written here on this blog. But she cannot cope with the truth and so chooses to stay with him, like a child that won't leave it's abusive parent until she gets the approval she is looking for. She'll never get it. She is stuck and it's very sad. He'll continue to abuse her and have his affairs since he can't help himself.
Don't feel sorry for Connie. She profits from his parasitic lifestyle. They are both sorry assed, do-gooders that sponge off of others. She has the life she wants and will keep it even if that means accepting his affairs and abuse.
It's a sad state of affairs they have. Forget them and get on with your life. They are not worth the effort.
The term Gaslighting derives from the 1938 stage play Gas Light…The plot concerns a husband who attempts to drive his wife to insanity by manipulating small elements of their environment, and insisting that she is mistaken or misremembering when she points out these changes. The title stems from the husband’s subtle dimming of the house’s gas lights, which she accurately notices and which the husband insists she’s imagining.
When first James tried to 'seduce' me, he started with an introduction to his womanizing past. I had asked him if he'd been married before. The answer I got was a long long list of affairs I didn't ask for. At the time I wondered why he told me all this stuff, but later I saw that by telling a woman how desireable you are by other women, makes that woman desire you. It's simple psychology but works well.
He started off telling me about his first relationships. All of them so screwed up. He told me about his homosexual relationship with his art-teacher and his sexual delinquent past where he would give older boys sexual favors on a daily basis.
He told me he was married and ended up in bed with his wife and her sister. His first wife left him for screwing her sister. Then he carried on to tell me about the 40 odd woman he slept with and how they 'recommended him' to their friends. Why would you tell someone all this info? To make themselves look sexually desirable of course. Making himself out to be the world's greatest casanova when in fact probably none of it is true or all exaggerated. Whether it is true or not is not so much the issue. It's disturbing hoever way you look at it.
He told me how as a pastor in the church women would relieve him sexually before he went out to give a sunday mass/sermon and how at Solid Rock Vista one of his followers came in half dressed offering him sexual favors and another showed him her nipple piercings.
Did you also know he has a really interesting porn collection on his external hard drive? Not your run of the mill boy/girl, but some really nasty stuff.
This is only a fraction of the weird things he did. There is so much more and I can't believe I just fell for it unquestioningly. As if it's normal to have this kind of a past and now be the one preaching God's word. There is no way (unless by supreme divine intervention) a man this tainted could be pure and be getting visions from Jesus as he claims he is.
He is a sexual menace and I for one know from personal experience that he is NOT what he says he is. He can cry and feel sorry for himself, make others feel sorry for him so well, I've seen him do it. The fake crying! I knew there was something wrong there.
I feel so stupid for having believed him. All he wanted was some fun with a naive, stupid woman half his age.
If you admire him for all said above, then good for you. Have a really good spiritual life with all that.
You cannot legally pursue criminals like James Parkinson, because in the eyes of the law there is no crime (other than adultery). Of course there might be tax evasion and stuff like that and just maybe there are some women who haven't pressed charges yet out of shame or guilt, but might do so in the future.
But from a humane perspective, he is trash, a classic example of the rotten apple in the basket you need to get rid of. The evidence is overwhelming. He is a fornicating, power-hungry geriatric pornographer of the worst kind. He will spare no man, woman or child to get his sexual satisfaction. He will destroy any marriage, family or friendship like squashing a bug, without remorse. It is funny that we live in a so-called sophisticated world in which people like this can go on with their business uninteruptedly. In earlier days, such a man would be sent to the gallows. No doubt, the world would be a better place without James Parkinson in it. The irony of the case is that he himself always says that your being attracts your life and also that who lives by the swoard, will die by the swoard. What will become of you then James??
You can catch James lying just about anything he says to impress people. Here's a couple of quotes from his arsenal of lies and insults. I guarantee you these are the exact words, literal and not taken out of context.
we'll start with the food and drink topic of lies:
I never drink coffee, it is too acidic for me.
I haven't drunk alcohol for over 30 years.
I don't eat anything with a face.
Then his virtues and X-men capabilities:
I don't do sex anymore, I have passed beyond that.
I can hear and see things that are happening half a mile down the road, it's amazing.
I can look at a tree and see through it, or around it. When you look at a tree, you will just see a tree. It's so hard to explain.
I can turn off being awake at will.
When I meditate, I leave my body for hours, drifting. (sleeping and snoring...)
And of course the backstabbing:
I would never turn my back on you.
Connie gets a divorce every week. She is like that since she got her hysterectomy.
Steve is so stupid. He still makes the same mistakes he did when I first met him. He still steps in Buddy's shit in my backyard and doesn't get it.
Curtis is a disgusting fag.
I will never go after a woman 30 years younger than me.
To husband: I never wanted to come to your house. I was God's Will that I come here. You think I like being here with you people (at the same time having affair with wife).
To wife: I will give up everything I have here, and leave all behind to come and live with you and take care of you and your children.
I'd like to comment on his not having sex anymore. I'd like to add that he is actually impotent and that he has used celibacy the past 10 years to cover for this fact. Also, impotency of this nature arises when people have been over-indulgent in sex during their earlier years (as has James) and that it takes more and more extreme sexual perversions to make them able to perform. This is James to a tee..
I'd like to add that this doesn't mean all impotency is due to oversexedness! But in his case, it is...
Also, the comment about Steve. James also said Steve was an air head who wanted to be better than him, who was always looking to compete with James and wanted what everything he had including his wife. What kind of sick group are these people? Why would a so-called spiritual leader be supporting such weak people? And what's worse is he brags about it, because telling me Steve wants to be him makes him look very good.
The psychology behind all this is really very simple, so simple in fact one wouldn't even consider it a possibility.
I don't know who you all are, but I have something on James which is rather disturbing. There was a time his 'cult' as you call it took their kids out of school and home schooled them. They all lived very closely and intimately. On one occasion James was accused of pedophelic activities. Got too close to the kids. It never came to court because they protected him but reading all this, it fits perfectly in his profile, although sincerely, I hope to God that it didn't happen. Something like that you don't wish on anyone. I would like to see him brought down, as do many people out here who have known him. But he seems to be able to get up everytime and rebuild his mini-empire.
Yes, I've heard this before. BUt there was no proof right? That figures that they would protect him, he seems to have them so locked into his being, they can't be without him.
What a wasted life those who live under someone's rule have.
There are many, too many, unfortunate circumstances where "the sum is NOT greater than the whole of it's parts"... and that would be societies created (of any size) and dominated by a vampire-like leader (as low as dirty Ministers to as recognizedly powerful as corrupt Presidents).
The goodness is stunted that one person can be capable of giving to the world, sucked dry and mutilated into a horrible excuse for a community where no one is benefiting but the corrupter, and the individuals are locked into some sort of warped existence.
I cannot fathom any enlightenment that could be so dirty. The childishness of THIS Sexual Manipulation is both dangerous AND so immature.
Please... those who read this. Take a simple Psychology Course and call me in the morning... it cannot fall between the cracks once you ADMIT, finally ADMIT, it's not computing.
When you were born, you were clean- beautiful- and POSSIBLE. Take a self-inventory now. You have to answer to many things greater than yourself.
Happy Thanksgiving here in the USA. And James, go choke on a wishbone. Maybe then the spell will be broken and your "children" can drive your convertible down to a shelter for Thanksgiving Dinner and re-learn to live... to see what humanity is really about.
"If you don't control your mind, someone else will."
What's fascinating to me reading all of these blogs is that you are all so victimized, which yes is true but you chose it freely, being a child of SR I did not, I remember fighting becoming absorbed into SR with all my person even though at the time I didn't know why I felt as if I was going insane, why I was acting out, why I felt as If I wanted to scream and kick. It's because my instincts were right on, it was a bad place run by a bad man. I remember you all going along while he had one or another of the members abuse us publicly, no one stopped it, as you all rant and rave and feel sorry for yourselves you should stop and remember you did nothing to protect your own children. Just don't forget it.
I'm not sure who is writing what, but I'd like to react to comment of the person who says he/she was a child of SR. If I understand you correctly you are saying you are the son or daughter of one of SR's members? I hope I am write in assuming this. If what you say is true then we are truly truly sorry for whatever happened to you. Child abuse in whatever form is the most evil kind, becaue kids really are truly helpless. This man should be hung and castrated.
You write about free choice, and it's true you had even less of a choice but adults can be manipulated the same way, we are just children in a bigger body and some of us are completely unaware of these dangers.
Then you say you were abused why we all looked on. This is the most disturbing part of your comment. First of all, we (the writers of this blog) have never been in California, some of us live on the other side of the continent and I live in europe. We have never met you I don't think, we just talked to a couple of SR's members online. We saw enough abuse there to make our hair stand on end. That was just what we saw on skype. Also we met James in person, he came to our house and almost destroyed our family. We were completely taken in, but when the truth started coming out about his sexual exploits we started to realize this man was not who he says. Secondly and most importantly, it is utterly unacceptable that you were abused. This makes me sick to my stomach that one of the kids involved was not protected. My kids I have been able to protect, by breaking away with what I knew for sure was evil, but it cost a lot and almost led us to destruction. I have seen with my own eyes what he can do and we only knew him a year.
We do not feel victimized, but angry. That a man like this can keep on doing what he is doing to people, twisting their minds and using spiritual rhetoric to do it. Child of SR, the people involved are/were all looking for something REAL, we thought we found it when we found him. By accident we fell into his hands and he used the info we gave him to fool us. Your parents (I'll give them the benefit of the doubt) will have been in the same position. He weakens your spirit. There are such things as evil spirits. He is being used by them. And you cannot do much about it, but hopefully come out stronger when you have realized and seen what he really is.
So we are not sitting around ranting and raving, we are here to serve as a warning sign to help others realize this man is evil. What would you want us to do? Not say or do anything? If you knew a rapist or pedophile, would you let children play in his front yard? NO! We, all of us that know, have a responsibility to tell people who this man is and do whatever we can to make sure no-one falls into his hands again.
This man is evil, you must fight evil, not just sit around and say 'this is what happened to me, I'll accept it'. However noble that sounds, it's also cowardice to not stick out your neck and tell people what you know.
I wish you much strength and hope you will contact us.
"I remember you all going along while he had one or another of the members abuse us publicly, no one stopped it,"
And to be clear, it wasn't only ONE of the kids, it was ALL of them. The oldest got it the worst. The physical abuse subsided as time went on, but definitely the oldest kids got it pretty hard.
To my knowledge there was no sexual abuse, it was physical abuse in the form of harsh and very frequent spankings, a lot of yelling, public humiliation, etc.
I am one of those who sat by. I also participated with my own children and occassionally with others kids. It was wrong and I AM SO VERY SORRY. I really am.
Thank you for your comment, and even though what you describe is pretty horrific, it's good that this is all coming to light. The ironic thing is that to me he implied that he was against physical abuse towards children. He told me that it discipline should happen with love.
I'm sorry too. This man has gotten all of you to re-enact his child abuse scenario. There is still time to be free of him. And this is the first step. I wish I could do something more, and though that sounds perhaps patronizing, this is incredibly painful to witness. We knew there had to be more, but we didn't realize the full extent of it. It really is heart-breaking when kids are involved.
It's understandable that children who have been hurt in their youth by this man will be annoyed at this blog. I was thinking about the comment made and I can see that what we are saying must seem trivial to those who experienced constant abuse for many years.
Please know that we are not here to complain about him, we are here to actually do something, we think by exposing every single detail of every lie he told might get people to think about him. The best we can do from here is this, and so far there have been enough people coming forward to make us realize this blog is important enough to stay a while, for as long as is necessary, as a voice for those need it.
You see, it's very subtle. People are getting sucked into his web still. Good people who are taken in with him just like we were. And he will bring them down too. And so against all odds, we will try to speak out as much as possible in the hope that more and more will see him in his true light.
Robert Burton started an organisation called the Fellowship of freinds in 1970.The Fellowship advertises itself as Gurdjieff-Ouspensky Centers through bookmarks and in the internet. He uses fragments of the knowledge you can find in Ouspensky's books. The group has about 2000 members all around the world, who pay at least 10% of their gross income every month, plus many extra donation.
This link provides a lot of backround information [wordpress.com] [animamrecro.wordpress.com]
It is a blog with a few thousand posts of Ex-member and members of this organisation
The egotism that social media allows people, especially weak people, to "express themselves" with on the Internet is mind-blowing. This is where they can paint a neat little picture of their simple brains and lives and little group together. I guess the climax is a little "harhar" about a trivial quote or play on Gurdjieff's more vague sayings... "oh, it's so tough becoming enlightened teehee ha ha ha baaa baaaa baaa" I hope someone can wake up and realize the road filled with I's is where they've been walking all along.
As far as the ride they're bound to continue on, don't forget that day in early school where the popular kid let you sit with them and all you had to do was shit on everyone else and mimic their social rhetoric. Don't forget the fall from that day, and it's inevitable grace to experience- to not forsake humanity or anyone else for your benefit or rise. Not listening to the lies of a gilded idiot who consumes your attention and would toss you away at a moment's notice. I guess life IS forever trying to "grow up". The first step is a choice.
James, through systematic mental manipulation, is able to put an individual in such a stressful situation that he cannot use his mind correctly anymore. This stress or psychosis makes the cult member:
Mentally unstable Psychotic Emotionally unstable Cognitively unstable This stress leads to a chemical reaction in the brain that then starts to produce endorphins, or "happy hormones" that calm down the individual. But as soon as the stress diminishes, the member experiences abstinence problems. The member then becomes nervous, scared, anguished, irritable, sleepless and finally depressed and neurotic. In order to ease his pain, the member goes back to the group. This syndrome is called the Sisyphus syndrome (after the Greek god).
This is why James' people keep on going back, they really are addicted to the kick he gives. The push me downs and pick me ups James gives them.
I know from personal experience that he is addictive and I had to be in contact with him all the time, and he let me! He just absorbs all of it narcissistically.
What must it be for kids to know what their parents did? How can you FIX that?
Recruits brought into the Gans group are essentially duped to believe that the group is benevolent and will enrich their lives. For example, by somehow advancing their spirituality or increasing their self-esteem and/or sense of security. As a result of this deception and the systematic use of highly manipulative techniques of influence, recruits come to commit themselves to the group’s proscribed ways of thinking, feeling and acting; in other words, they become members or converts. There is also deception in the recruitment process, which will be described later.
For persons trying to get free from the tentacles of Fourth Way / or distorted forms of Sufi practice that took a culty turn, doing some overview reading of the history of Hermetic texts, and their historical sources may help de-mystify the stuff used to mess with your heads.
As I suggest, Hermetic material may be the equivalent of a 'mother sauce' - it was a messy but fascinating collection of texts and it slipped into the esoteric societies within Chrisitanity, Judaism, and Islam.
The Hermes Trismagistius texts were mistaken as sources of primordial wisdom, but actually were composed in the second century CE in the late Classical world, alongside early Christianity and diaspora Judaism. They had such a wide diffusion among both the intellectual elite and in more popularized forms that they seem weirdly familiar.
This isnt because they are true but because ideas are highly portable.
If you give yourself a chance to see that this stuff has its own niche in the history of ideas, you'll find that the teachers who imprisoned you and instilled fear were just using bits and pieces from a collection of material that very many others have exploited in the past and will continue to exploit in the future.
[forum.rickross.com]
Here is an article describing how Hermetic ideas were incorporated into Sufism.
[www.muslimphilosophy.com]
Much later, Mme Blavatsky, who grew up in a Russian family whose male members were members of Masonic lodges, would have learned about Hermetic material as filtered through the Western European Freemason traditions. Blavatsky in turn wrote her own set of texts, and these texts were propagated far and wide by the methods of mass publication made available in the late 19th century. This material was very popular in Tsarist Russia, and it was exploited in turn by Gurdjieff.
What added disastrously to the impact is that this material already has a haunting familiarity because it underlies so much of our culture without most of us being aware of it -- The Secret and The Da Vinci Code and The Matrix are variations on gnostic/Hermetic themes.
What made this still more damaging was that Gurdjieff appears to have been proficient in trance induction.
This stuff has its place in the history of ideas and isnt magic at all. Learning all this stuff did not cure Gurdjieff of his own chief feature--greed and a need for attention from an entourage--tastes shared by too many of his successors.
You might want to do some research on Michael Aquino as well. He took over Anton LaVey's Satanic church in San Francisco and founded the Temple of Set in Marin. Interestingly, several Gurdjieff books are on that organization's reading list. Aquino was also a high ranking officer in the U.S. Navy and at least partly responsible for the abuse of children in mind control experiments at the San Francisco Presidio, which was exposed in the news in the later 1970s.
I know of at least one Gurdjieff/Subud group that is connected to an area Satanic group.
Anton LeVay? Funny that should be mentioned because James told me that he and Connie once performed an excorcism in Levay's son. I found it a rather distrubing adn unblievable account at the time..
This is the child of SR who left a comment earlier. Thank you for all your kind words. I was alittle overwhelmed after finding this blog and another blog about the group. I found out a few things I didn't know that are very disturbing and was very angry. I also didn't know this was mainly people out of the united states. I thought it was Vista sr members. I'm fine now, just saddened by the fact that my family's life and my life wre so affected. I changed as a child, my personality and will were broken and I realize that as an adult I'm always trying to put myself back together. Some good came out of it though. I consider myself to be a kinder more compationate and empathetic person because of my experiences. On the otherhand I have low self esteem, I find having relationships with anyone scary and draining and I won't allow myself to become succesful. I take these things as my responsibilty but I also know were they came from. I work on myself as much as I can. I'm proud of myself for making this far. Thanks again for all the kind words. I truely hope one day the remaining members will take back their lives but if not I will still love them.
James is a master hypnotist and they are all hypnotized. He has told them everything they need to know about him, and I mean the truth about him, the real truth, all the stuff we're saying here they know, and more, yet they stay. They are the baby elephant with the chain removed.
James is a master hypnotist, and this is why it's so important to stay away. A single conversation, a single handshake, is all it takes to set the hook.
James is such a master hypnotist that he's convinced them they're struggling against the hypnotism of life, all the while keeping them hypnotized in a strange devotion to him. The chain is off, but they still cannot leave.
This is so disturbing. So utterly disturbing! This is so evil, so warped, so twisted. In what world do we live that people believe the lies and follow the actions of this corrupt soul? What is happening in America, even europe and the rest of the world that evil like this is allowed to go forward and distract people from their purpose in life. These followers of James have lives, jobs, kids. Yet every week they go back to this pathetic excuse for a human being to be abused and maltreated some more.
I hope you can shed some light on this anonymous. Where has a feel for the truth gone?
The scary thing about realizing that "they all know" and nothing seems to come from this stunning fact, merely proves how truly accurate it is to label this group a "cult".
Good point. Its a fragile situation. The frustrating thing is, it's so obvious to everyone, but somehow he has this bad power over them, to keep them locked into his being and in a big way they like what he does for them, like you said before. They hang around him for the power trip. People with power have an overwhelming attraction, it cannot be fought lightly but must be destroyed completely. They are being sucked into a black hole of negative energy, but somewhere they know this.
Like a friend recently said, we are screaming at them from outside the prison gates, but the gates are open and they can walk out anytime they like, but they choose not to. They prefer their imprisonment because the warden is feeding them false and distorted information. It's like looking through the mirror, the reflection is the same as reality just inverted and backwards. James' truths are exactly like that: they look real almost indistinguishable from the real thing, but they are the exact opposite, going against the grain of truth, and if you only judge by the words you will never see it, you HAVE to use your inner voice to hear what he says in the anti-truth.
The realization of this is very sad. They are in fact consciously choosing evil, or they are too weak to fight it in themselves. It's these kind of people he chooses, vulnerable, seekers after spirituality. They can often go both ways quite easily: up or down.
I'm not sure what you mean by "fragile"... can you elaborate? It doesn't seem very fragile to me but maybe I don't understand what you mean.
Here's another really fun thing about sr/esoterictalks.com: how the people sell each other out in order to incur favor, be right, etc. I cannot even begin to enumerate how many times I sold others out, and how many times I got sold out. It's part and parcel of sr/esoterictalks.com. Quite disgusting in hindsight, but it all boils down to loyalty to James. You cannot have anybody you are more loyal to, and still be an active or "committed" member of sr/esoterictalks.com. All the observations about James coming between spouses are absolutely correct.
Fragile wasn't the right word I think, and reading back I think i meant it's all very tricky.
But your comment on selling each other out is insighful. I experienced this with him. He encouraged it and did it himself. He set me up against Curtis and Curtis against me, also Craig and Mile and whoever else needed to be against me. I had a big mouth and I needed to be shut up, so I was publicly humiliated so often I just got immune. Indeed, all loyalty must be to James only. I was so surprised at this. I would tell him something privately and he proceeded to tell the others what I'd said! Very disturbing. When I objected he said I liked to keep things in the dark and that was not good for the work, things had to be in the open, which meant that anything confidential you told him could be completely taken out of context and revealed. They all fell for it and of course I was shunned... He got everyone to dislike me. And then when I got really pissed off about it he said I was abusing him! really, the logic this man has drove me absolutely crazy, and it makes you wonder about your own sanity. But for him, it's a great way of keeping everyone in line. They all fear being the object of ridicule and so they keep their mouths shut.
Just this should be enough to send people running, but somehow he manages to convince people it's the truth. At the time I also thought it was not right of me to confide info to him secretly, I almost bought his bullshit, I literally convinced myself he was right, because I felt I needed to keep up and do the 'work'.
It doesn't really matter who our anonymous writer is, but it would be cool to find out! I have a hunch based on some info I got from the evilmaster himself just before it was exit time. But we'll see.. Maybe you'll write to us in due time. We hope so.
I've just been googling around and saw that he was back on james.xanga.com, where he is complaining about what we are all doing to him! LOL! THat's so funny. Aren't you attracting this life James? AND you always said 'we' don't do anything to anyone, they do it to themselves! It's so funny how he takes it all back when it's all on him! And in one of his complaints he says: Does no-one have personal responsibility? You can imagine how I almost choked to death when I read that....
This man just sits infront of his mac all day writing pure unadulterated bullshit and lies and they all love it! And I must admit, so did I until I saw who I was, and now it's just empty words, but at the time I thought he was some kind of messiah. WHat a FOOL! I can't put into words how stupidly idiotic this has all been. And I should have known better, but he's clever and I just never thought someone like this actually existed...
And reading his comments (couldn't help myself), and other people's to him, it's so obvious how he gains the love of his audience. He sucks up to them, says how wonderful they all have been, how he has always appreciated their eye for beuaty etc etc etc. Of course WHO doesn't want to get compliments like this!? It's the trap we all fall in. He flatters us at first and then draws us in for the kill, or in his world, a long, drawn-out skewing.
Anyway, it became quite evident how he operates. And how I fell into his hands in the first place. Apart from the fact that I was actually looking for something spiritual, It was my own insecure ego, emptiness and need for approal and flattery that got me into this mess. That's what he preys on. And it's a matter of time before he manages to discover what buttons he needs to push (wants he has decided if you are worth the effort of not) to make you run to him or send you away.
Tithing is 20% of gross. No hats passed. Checks get handed to James or Connie at end of meetings or other gatherings.
The really sad thing, and I do mean tragic, is how these people were believing Christians at one point. Many have been baptized. But Jesus is not welcome there any more, not as savior. He's welcome as long as he can sit beside Buddha, Gurdgieff, etc. But he is not welcome as savior.
This is helpful. Thank you. And yes, it is tragic, because this is exactly what people like James do, distract people from their true beliefs and lead them down a dark alley. They are too far down to want to get out, or do you think there is a possibility they will see there is still life beyond James? 20 years wasted on this man and his perversions. The fact that Connie takes the checks makes one think she's just as guilty for turning a blind eye. Even if she is getting a hard deal from this man, she's still living a lie, accepting blood money so she can fly around for her painting trips. On the one hand I feel sorry for these people, a real wish for them to wake up and see what's happened and leave, on the other it infuriates me that they 'know' as you have suggested, but choose to stay anyway and accept the abuse he hands out to them and others, to their kids etc. I know from my own experience how he brought me down and where backstabbing, gossip and lower morality became common-place. I knoew deep down that at the time my being was 'tempted' and I chose to give in. On the other hand, James sees our weaknesses and uses them for his own gain. He exploits us to get what he wants, money, sex, travel... Even though he says his travel is work, really it's not: He gets taken out to dinner almost every day, cappuccions at the local cafes, beer and whiskey in the bars at night. Free accommodation and sight-seeing. It's not work, all he does is transfer holosync to their computers and tell them how they are behaving badly all the time. It's really so simple and so stupid!
The fact that James got people to leave Jesus, works nicely with who he is. He 'waters' things down so they become meaningless. Saying Jesus is like the other prophets, there is no real salvation, no evil , no guilt. This is of course quite convenient to his non-morality as it gives him the space to act out and do and say whatever he likes.
I've seen and heard things, as I think you have too, that were so utterly and absolutely evil, I don't know why I didn't run immediately. But he ensnares us and it becomes difficult.
I'm sorry about the tithing, it's a disgusting tradition (I wrote a blog about it somewhere on here called: One ring to rule them all), so taken out of context and used by pseudo pastors and other conmen to exploit feelings og shame and guilt in their followers. No money, no enlightenment.
I also witnessed extreme changes in personality in James. He would get angry and let his mask fall to reveal a whole new side. He flipped from the 'soft' James we all know to the possessed girl in the excorcist. Within seconds. When I reacted he watered it down, said it was not anger and it was my perception that I saw it as anger. He could REALLY confuse you like this. I would doubt my memory all the time. A Jekyl and Hyde personality, although I doubt that most people get to see this side of him.
It makes me sad to see what you are writing here about James. He told us there were people who disliked him, but we didn't realize the extent of that hate. You have misinterpretted his message and all this is one big complaint room....
We know James tells people we are doing this because we don't like him or because we are negative or because our being attracted our lives or whatever bullshit he tells people to make it seem he is the innocent victim of violent abuse and spiritual persecution.
But the fact is, anonymous, you don't know what you are talking about. Everyone, who has dealt with him in person knows this is the truth, even those who haven't yet dared to admit it, know this is the truth about him.
This man is highly toxic, and we are obliged to spill the beans on EVERY part of his evil personality and will continue to do for as long as we see necessary.
You are truly mislead if you think this man is a good man. Maybe he's been flattering you too on facebook/xanga/twitter/linkedin/youtube/esoterictalks/skype/msn or another internet hangout he might have? The fact that you would write this is proof that you have fallen for him blindly without criticism, that you accept his doctrine and his words as the truth without looking at the man or without even wondering if anything we say is true. WHY IS THAT? WHY DO YOU BELIEVE HIM UNQUESTIONINGLY?
I'm sorry, but it's absolutely clear, there is NO doubt about this man, the only doubt comes from the lies that people tell themselves to justify their James worship.
This man is a multiple-adulterer, a thief, a manipulator, a verbal/physical abuser, a sexual deviant and many other things. This is not heresay, these are witness accounts and the truth. We have experienced him in the flesh and know it.
If you would like to contend with us, we'd gladly accept your invitation to talk.
But before you get the chance to do that, James will tell you that it's better to ignore us for the sake of not being negative. But the REAL reason is he knows that if all the people that knew him were in a room together, able to discuss him, he would be finished. He likes to keep everyone at a distance, only letting those 'in love' with him devotedly, talk to each other.
He wouldn't let me to talk to others and he discouraged any contact with them and once I started asking questions and being a trouble-maker. THey, of course, reacted obediently to his request.....
You can think what you like, good luck with that, but ask yourself, what goal does this serve us? We don't get anything out of it. We can only warn people who might be looking to see if he is genuine. The others who are with him (like you) are already lost...
yes, I agree with the comment above and wonder who you are to be stating that we have 'misinterpretted' him! This is just proof to the fact that you are choosing to believe in the illusion James shows you about himself and about the truth and that you cannot accept what we are saying because it would spoil whatever flattery or power trip he's giving you.
Please elaborate on our misinterpretaions. We would like to know how that fits in with is affairs, lying, abuse etc. Seriously, as said before let's open up this discussion and see where we are going wrong....
".. we didn't realize the extent of that hate. You have misinterpretted his message and all this is one big complaint room...."
Do you honestly believe that people would spend any time here at all if they did not have something legitmate to "complain" about, as if they had nothing better to do with their time? Are all of the people here wrong? You're really willing to discount everything said here? You must not have read all of the comments.
You accused every single person here of being a "hater". I hope you stop for a moment and consider this. Your sweeping generalization of every single person here is naive. By judging every single person here it's clear you've fallen into James' trap of getting-to-be-better-than, something discussed on this thread. Please take a few minutes to read all of the comments before posting again.
Here's a tip: if there's somebody in your life who you KNOW is trustworthy from a spiritual standpoint, somebody who's spiritual walk you do not doubt to be true and honest and who also understands cult dynamics (not James of course or anybody who's heard of sr/esoterictalks.com), have that person listen to the podcasts and read this blog. Get their opinion. Then come back and tell us what they said.
James can easily twist what we are doing to make this seem like a 'hate'campaign. He will tell you this: 1. They didn't get what they wanted and this is their REVENGE 2. They don't agree with what I believe and they have to be RIGHT. 3. They are judgemental and don't understand the Work like YOU do.
And he will finish all that off with a semi-nonchalant comment about his always being abused and how all the prophets before him have always been persecuted.
And they believe him because he will start crying, that fake, exaggerated crying he does, the 'feel sorry for James'tears are a last resort when he's not getting people to comply. He goes to the self-pity card which works very well I must say, I fell for it many times before! And then when he's done crying, he'll say: I'm such a baby for crying, but I love these people, I truly feel their pain and no matter what they do I will love them because my love is REAL and unending. Love has no beginning. My life is about service to God, about love and I feel grateful for being humbled by them....
And everyone will think: How can this man be so tolerant of what they are saying about him? So compassionate? He MUST be a good man to turn the other cheek to all this!
And so it passes and James will have won a few back. He plays this game every time. I've seen it SO often, pitying the old man with one leg, provoking motherly instincts to care for him. It's just disgusting how this man lies and gets us all to do what he wants.
No words for it.
A word to our friend in California, remember this could be some kind of provocation comment so be on your guard...(yes, I'm a little paranoid!)
Let me keep this simple for the stubborn persistent ignorant James-church members.. Picture a burglar. He breaks into your house, which is a metaphor for your life. The crowbar he uses to break down the lock on the door is his lies, his smooth talking to persuade you. He then proceeds but not only takes your money and other assets. He also turns out to be a psychopath and decides to rape your wife just for the fun of it. And in the end he will tell you it was your own fault because you let him in. And by the time you find out he's gone. That is exactly the essence of what he does. If I had the chance I would put a bullet in his head and send his wife the bill . There is not a single doubt in my mind about this low-life piece of white trailer trash . Is that clear enough for you?
I was once very 'close' to James in the family sense. He is not an innocent victim of abuse as some think. He has always been manipulative, ever since he was a child. His family know what he is, part of the reason nobody talks to him.
Are you family? I know he has many brothers and sisters, all of which he says don't speak to him anymore. I wonder why? In his eyes it was all their fault. The only ones he speaks to are Micheal his brother (who he says worships him) and his mother.
This is the man who will screw with your marriage, family, kids, take your money and when you object he will (without the blink of an eye) say it's your fault for being negative.
He did it to us and to many other people. Screwing our wives, our families and our heads.
We were all sucked in by his nice 'words'.
Best thing to do is get out and never have anything to do with this man...
but this guy is so clever, i remember once he made reference to that little voice (the one that tells you when something is wrong), but then he made the mistake of saying that that little voice might not be telling you the truth, and he went on and on, and then finally i realized that he was trying to tell me exactly WHAT my little voice was saying, and i said to myself: "hey, wait a minute, YOU are not in my head, so how the hell do you know what my little voice is saying"...and of course i realized that it was just his clever way of manipulating everyone....
I'm a child of SRV, I will leave stories behind, take them as you will. As a child I remember james lining the children up and having them "confess" to masterbating in front of the whole group. He made one young adult wear a diaper he was about 13 (do you think this has ruined his chance at having real healthy relationships) I bet. He would call me bitch whenever he got a chance. My cousin came by to visit when I introduced her (she was 13) all he could say was "wow look at those tits". He had all the adults make paddles and write funny witty comments on them then they would be used relentlessly. when I was a teenager he sang "if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, make an ugly girl your wife" I was 14 akward and not very attractive. I have many many more....
Thank you for sharing this absurd, and incredibly disturbing story of events. We are grateful for you for doing this. It's testimonies like this that make a real difference. On behalf of the writers of this blog much gratitude and sorrow at reading this. He should never be allowed around children, infact this man should not be allowed to live for what he did to you.
So, we have an abusive pedophile confirmation for sure now. Though, did anyone ever doubt that nagging feeling?
This is beyond disgusting and can no longer be tolerated. If this doesn't jar someone still in his group out of their mind control, then maybe there's nothing left of their soul to save.
It is NEVER okay to humiliate someone, to physically abuse someone, or sexually objectify a child. NEVER.
I'm a child of SRV. Thank you for all the kind words. What's strange is even though I'm an adult now and not apart of the group any longer I still feel guilty and afraid to tell the truth. He has a special talent, he can make you feel like a translucent piece of paper, naked and vulnerable, you know thathe can read your very thoughts, so don't think anything against him or else. I'm afraid he'll find out some how and know it's me and I'll be punished. So odd. He looks for people who are lost, beat down, losers, then he draws them near makes them feel as if they are loved they are apart of something special, they are unique. You finally feel as if you have found a home. He raises you above even his own followers. As soon as he knows you've swolled his bait, then he changes slowly he will start to tease you, tell your little sectrets, expose you to the group, humiliate you, and when he thinks you've had enough then he'll make you his little baby again his favorite. You get so caught up in this game you forget that you are a free person, you do not have to play. I remembered I left.
I was eleven when I was brought into the church. I was going through alot in my life at that time as it was, then being thrust into a totally unfamiliar situation (religion),I started acting out. I knew even at that young age that the group was wrong, off somehow. And being a child you have no power so the only thing I knew how to do was cry scream yell, hangout with the wrong kids etc. My family didn't know what to do. They tried spanking,the good ol fashion shoulder pinch, standing in the corner for hours praying etc. When that didn't work they invited James over, he told me I was a bitch and that I would be sent away. I already hated him and knew he was evil but my family loved and adored him, my mother was anamored with him, her eyes would gloss over when he was around. when I found out I would be sent away to live with my drunk of a father I knew my mother was lost to me, I was no longer the most imortant thing in her life, maybe I never had been. It's a horrifying feeling as a child to be thrown to the wolvesas your mother and her Pastor look on. He smiled when he told me I would be leaving, as if he knew he had won.
I was sent away for about 2 years. In that time I lost myself. Before I left I was troubled but I was strong and spunky, I had a sense of self, I would spit in anyones face who treated me poorly I still had a sense of self. 2 years with a drunk father beat me down, I was frightened all the time, it was a living nightmare, but no matter how I begged my mother to help me she wouldn't. I gained 75 pounds, fat and depressed I finally went to visit my mother I begged again for her to take me back, she took me to James, he questioned me and told me if I became a bitch again if I caused problems I would be sent back. At that moment I broke, I lost me, I said I would do anything to stay, I became pliant, I became weak and soft, scared and timid. Gone was the spirit of independence and childlike frivolity and rebeliousness that helps young people become strong adults. I remember that exact moment. It felt as if apart of me flew away, as an adult I search everyday to find her. I don't think I ever will. Shame on you James Parkinson.
"What's strange is even though I'm an adult now and not apart of the group any longer I still feel guilty and afraid to tell the truth. "
I felt the same for a long time too, I was only involved with him for a year, but very instensly. I felt guilt about everything, he used it against me. In fact I felt guilt about him and what I was doing with these people, but he switched it around and made it seem it was my fault for being a liar.
"He has a special talent, he can make you feel like a translucent piece of paper, naked and vulnerable, you know thathe can read your very thoughts, so don't think anything against him or else."
Yes! That IS his talent. Even though I believe he has no real talent, he's just a manipulative psychopath who has a born ability to 'read' people for his own gain, to use them and put them down.
" I'm afraid he'll find out some how and know it's me and I'll be punished. So odd. He looks for people who are lost, beat down, losers, then he draws them near makes them feel as if they are loved they are apart of something special, they are unique. You finally feel as if you have found a home. He raises you above even his own followers. As soon as he knows you've swolled his bait, then he changes slowly he will start to tease you, tell your little sectrets, expose you to the group, humiliate you, and when he thinks you've had enough then he'll make you his little baby again his favorite. "
Yes again! This is exactly what he does, being the favorite gives you the power again, the power trip they are all riding on. That's what he relies on. That's why they all want to be with him ALL THE TIME! All his women adore him, I did too until, like you, I rebelled and became the 'bitch'. I also just knew there was something very very wrong.
"You get so caught up in this game you forget that you are a free person, you do not have to play. I remembered I left." This is the whole problem. This is why they are all stuck. Luckily you left though.
Let me ask you though, what about the other kids, do they know what you know? James talked about Rachel June, I met her on skype once, she seemed so nice, so educated. And other kids too. Did they get out or do they still worship him too?
Your stories are so disturbing and as a kid your WORST nightmare is being abandoned by your mother. He has them in his grip, they have sold their sould for his love and approval, because he has given them something they crave, they are missing something in their lives and he fills that space. They are hooked. I'm sorry about your mother. I really hope you find her and get her back.
I hope you can use this experience to your advantage. Evil like this can be made good if you overcome it and see it.
I'm from the first wave of children to come out of SRV. I wasn't born into it as the second wave was. Something changed when the second wave came. I think the group became smaller, mellowed and changed their diection from fundamentalist christianty and conservatism to a more eastern esoteric philosophy. Abusing children doesn't really vibe with that picture (thank god). None of the first wave or the second wave are apart of the group any longer. The group is very small now. I think James gave up on trying to force the kids to be apart of the group, it was fruitless.
About my family and mother, I love them with all my heart, I forgave my mother years ago. The members are not the same as they were, age and the new eastern religious direction has mellowed them. I know they will never leave but they are all adults and from what I've seen they aren't hurting anyone so I leave it alone. They have changed but James has not. I think he's become bored with them anyways, he leaves constently to go abroad to get his ego stroked because the group is old hat and to small. He puts on a front a outfit called the fourth way, yoga, meditation, macrobiotics etc. It's his cloak of light to hide his dark needs. He's a vampire. Sadly the group will never see this. The good thing that james has done that I have witnessed is that because he's teaching something which I consider to be healthier (buhddism, yoga self realization etc.) the members truely believe this is his teaching and follow it and they have grown weather or not he's usingit in a evil way or not. So some good has come I just wish they could see him for what he is. And again my family is good he is not.
Let us be clear though, he is currently sexually abusing abroad.
And for those who've been 'converted to the eastern ideas' . They can teach you how to read in prison, but you'll still be in prison for life.
Also let's not assume those that are currently in his cult will "stay forever". They aren't living their own lives and this is neither decent, eastern, new age or mellow- it is hell, it is living JAMES' lIfe WITH HIM. THEY DO NEED OUT.
VAMPIRES, SCOUNDRELS, AND MOLESTERS often never stop till they die. Please realize we must not minimize the effect this fucktard has on others, I know first hand- he can kill your autonomy, this is the most dangerous.
I'm sorry but no mellowing makes this all go away. And his teachings will never be a good thing. He's evil, he infects truth with his being and distorts it, thus everything they get from him is somehow tainted. There is NO way of justifying him, them or their beliefs. They STILL turn a blind eye to the abuse he causes, we are recent proof of that. It's much more serious than you can imagine. I understand you may feel guilt for all the things you said, but you were right on the mark. Don't rob yourself of the truth...
I agree that there were two waves of kids, but I disagree that the abuse only occured with the first wave - it definitely continued with the second wave too, but it also subsided as time went on.
Also, I disagree that the members are growing. I know for a fact that this is not so. If they are mellowing, my bet is that it is due to age rather than James' teaching. In other words, they'd get more mellow regardless of where they are.
Also, some kids from the second wave, although not officially part of the group, still do visit the group on holidays. I'm sure James is very entertaining and cordial to them, even flirtatious with the older girls now that they're legally adults. They're accustomed to his antics so it doesn't seem out of the ordinary to them. They've seen it all for all of their lives, even seen him behave that way toward their own mothers. As long as Connie Parkinson has no problem with it, and as long as their own parents say nothing, then I cannot see why they would object.
For all of the bizarr-ness of solid rock vista/esoterictalks.com James Parkinson and Connie Parkinson, I think the single thing that is the most bizzar is how the men stay loyal to James after he has an affair with their wives. I know this to be an ABSOLUTE FACT in two cases.
Isn't this the most insane thing? The men stay loyal to him, and their wives get thrown under the bus. A-FRICKIN'-MAZING. If that is not a cult then I don't know what is.
And for those of you srv members reading this: you KNOW I am telling the truth. Shame on you, shame on us all, for putting up with it.
SHAME ON US ALL FOR ALLOWING ALL OF THIS TO HAPPEN. In our pride, in our vanity, in our fear, we stood by while all of these things happened, WE even participated in it. WAKE THE FUCK UP PEOPLE.
Actually, 3 wives, not two. He's only admitted to two but there are more women involved. And that's if you are talking 'screwing' around, there's a whole other bunch of women he fooled around with during his marriage that he doesn't consider affairs because he didn't actually have intercourse with them..
I was referring specifically to two MEN who stayed loyal to James after his affairs with their wives - Curtis and Jess. Yes I am aware that there were several affairs, but I am only aware of two of the husbands who threw their wives under the bus and stayed loyal to James. I am pretty sure the other husbands woke up and stayed loyal to their wives after their wives repented.
In the real world this would be considered absolutely outrageous - imagine this happening in any other situation, but because James is so amazing, so powerful, so special, it's just another day at sr/esoterictalks.com.
Consider also that long ago James mastered a technique called "snapping." Here's an excerpt on Amazon from a review of the book called "Snapping":
"Understanding this book gives the reader the ability to comprehend why so many people who get into cults will stay despite obvious absurdities associated with the cult experience. The authors demonstrate that the ecstatic/illumination experience so often treasured by spiritual seekers may only be energy releases associated with the mind dealing with high stress."
James is an expert at creating these sorts of circumstances and experiences. People get high off them, and praise him for being so wonderful. I know, I've experienced it first hand and seen it with the entire group an untold number of times. None of us realized it was just a form of psychological manipulation.
I didn't know about Jess' wife, I only knew about Curtis and two others. So there are 4 at least now we know of. THat's incredible. He lied to my face about this so many times. He said it was all nothing, just a woman who kissed him. How can they accept this? Be willing slaves to him after all he does. He treats both Jess and Curtis badly behind their backs. Calls them all sorts of things. He has REAL contempt for his most loyal followers, no respect for them at all, probably the reason for that is because they follow him around despite all the shitting he does on them.
How do you know he learnt this technique? I experienced this with him too. I was ecstatic when I first met him and couldn't and didn't want to give up that high....
And anonymous, thanks again .Your input is very valuable. You know more than anyone here. Could you possibly write up an account of what you know and email us? Anonymously if you want. We would like to make a blog post of your knowledge...
When I first read this blog I was horrified and disgusted by the affairs, and creepy group sex. I don't know why he's always been a letch. I guess the idea just made my mind recoil. Now I am vwry concerned for my mother. Can those of you who know list which one of the women were his victims. I want to talk with my mother but itsso scaryI know how she worships him.
True, he is evil, but that does not make them exempt from their responsibility in life. You can compare it to drug addicts who throw their lives away for their 'hit'. They will do anything to keep it and detox will take considerable effort. This kind of strength is inside them but they need to find it and use it to get out. It's hard, very hard, but it is possible.
I know from my one year with him how hard it is, let alone if you have been on his high for 20 years. It was near impossible to break free and I constantly buried my head in the sand about the truth, because being with him gave me a rush. I KNEW he was evil, without a doubt but something inside me didn't want to listen to that voice begging me to get out of there. Without him I got depressed and couldn't 'do' anything. I was dependent on him and what got me dependent was my own weakness, my own need for approval. Like many others who get involved he preys on our lack of self-worth. I could see how he affected me and how he affected my husband, who was not taken in by him at all. He and my father knew very quickly everything we are saying here, but I was blinded with adoration and did not listen to anyone. The point of this is, I chose to not see the truth, only when I had absolutely no other choice was I forced to face it and then I knew without a doubt he was evil and I saw the damage I had caused within my own family. This is the true evil of his being. The chain of events and evil and destruction this mans causes is immense. The ripple effect is huge, it will affect generations.
HE is EVIL because he uses our weakness for his own gain, but I believe we are all responsible for our actions. God only gives us tasks in life we can handle, it's hard but not impossible. We must try to aspire to these tasks whatever the cost of our comfort zones..
I don't know the women well, our other guest writer knows the ins and outs. What i know is from James and what I saw that year as i communicated with him daily on skype.
His right hand man Curtis got married 10 years ago and shortly afterwards James ended up having an affair with her. James told me she was flaky and that's why he left her. He said that as revenge she slept with Steve Filippo, another follower of SRV. He said Julie was a slut who slept around with everyone, she turned out to be a real piece of work. I don't believe this is the true sequence of events because I know from my own experience how he lies and twists the truth about EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING. If you ask me she realized on time what a degenerate he was and dumped him.
Curtis broke with him for 2 years or so because of this and then came back, according to James Curtis returned because his inner voice 'knew' that this was the path he had to follow.. [read: total bullshit]. Curtis is a good man, but very very lost in his total obedience and loyalty to James.
Tammie is Steve's wife, according to James she has a thing for him and approached him sexually a number of times. He says he refused her, but personally I think he's just scared of Steve :D
Pat is Rex's wife. She offered herself to him sexually, but he refused, so he says. He told me he is disgusted with her physically and that she is a huge bitch. He insult and picks on her constantly in their group sessions and she sits there and takes the abuse. He called her a 'cunt' so often even I became immune to it. When James said he would leave his wife and life for me, Pat said she would leave Rex to go with him because she can't live without him. She wants to marry him. Pat has a day where she sits and talks to James.
Lorrie. I don't know much about Lorrie, except that she is single and lebanese. She also adores James. I don't know of any sexual advances. She too has a day with James. Bith Pat and Lorrie bring him groceries on a daily basis. Thy wait on him whenever they can.
Jennifer, is Jess's ex-wife. That she had an affair with James I didn't know until yesterday. James has a lot of contempt for Jess and Jennifer. He told me Jennifer left the group and abandoned her husband because she wanted to find something better than Jess but that it wasn't working and she was very unhappy. But the real reason for all this probably lies in their affair. He bitches about everyone who leaves him or the group and it's always their fault for being negative!
Then there was Mrs S, whose name I will not mention here. Her husband wrote to us. He didn't tell me about any affairs but when I confronted James on what he did tell me, he admitted al by himself, there had been something between Mrs. S and himself. But that she had initiated it (as he says with all his women). Mr S also told us a woman in the group was made to sign something but when she refused was asked to leave the group. I guess that had something to do with their group sex thing.
James said the group sex thing was a 'power' exchange of which he as the leader. He said NO-ONE could understand what went on there and that it was all out of love, even the orgyish manifestations..
This man is sick and twisted. He uses everyone for his own gain. He sexually relieves himself online and is an exhibitionist. He taunted me sexually until I became immune. He said I was repressed and needed unrepressing. He used sexual language to shock me. He called it desensitization. He almost caused a split-personality in me. One side that went along with him, and another side, my real side that I put in a box and hid away for a while until it broke out and saved me. I know that sounds dramatic but this is how it felt. It was an indescribable experience. On the one hand he would act out and be sexaully deviant. He showed me pornography and told me to look at it. When I refused he got angry and said I didn't want to learn and that I was wasting his time. It was very upsetting and disturbing to see him in his true colors. But I MADE myself accept his part of him and only cared to look at that other side, the side I adored. That side I thought was truly spiritual. But it was not spiritual at all, it was a mask, his mask he uses to keep people from running....
James is absolutely bi-sexual. He has weird and perverted fantasies about sex and even told me that his best sexual encounter ever was with a man. He likes women too, but it's a power thing with them. He likes to be dominated. He has fetishes you could not believe, so warped and twisted. He ALMOST managed to convince me this was all normal! He also told me as a kid he would give other boys bj's in the woods everyday on his way to school. And that he had a huge sexual fantasy about his mother. When I objected to this, he said it was absolutely normal for boys to fantasize about their mothers and that all boys do that. THis was just too sickening for me to comprehend. He got angry again when I refused to believe this. He said I didn't know anything since I was repressed! LOL!
Jennifer left the group, but Jess would not. That's why she and Jess split up. Jess tell his kids that he's has to do whatever God tells him, and that God's best is for him to be at sr. Jess is actually afraid to leave. Jess never valued Jennifer as much as he did James. Jess and James are turning her kids away from her.
I know who you speak of when you refer to Mrs. S. She was also publically thrown under the bus many times (as were we all at various times). I am happy her husband stayed with her and did not follow suit.
You see, James turns it all around and blames it on the women. He quotes Gurdjieff, when G said something about the work being difficult for American women. So that's the hook for the sr women. James knows this quote will cause the women there to try harder. And it does.
He also publically castigates the men after their women leave and works very hard to get them to stay. Most of the time it doesn't work but with Jess and Curtis it did. He turns the Bible around by saying something about not following your wife, that Adam followed his wife's lead and look where that got us. Stuff like that.
Julie was Curtis' wife. It's true that she had affairs with both James and Steve. In many ways Curtis and Julie seemed like a great couple and a good match, but from what I recall Curtis was still a closet gay at that time... and it affected their marriage. She left after the second affair. Tammie found out publically (at the same time as the rest of us) one Easter.
Pat is verbally abused by not only James but her own husband and son as well. She wants to be the good wife so she just takes it not understanding that sh'e setting a horrible example for her own son.
Lorrie has no life so her involvement doesn't surprise me. She has a sister who's family was part of sr but they left years ago.
The main reason people stay is that they're scared to leave. It feels like walking the plank! But after you walk away, you realize you never actually fall into the ocean. haha looking back I can laugh at my fear of leaving. But I remember how real it was - it was VERY real.
"Can't we say that everything is mind control? People are persuaded all the time to do things."
"It is certainly true that we are influenced throughout our lives. There is a continuum of influence that starts at one end with benign influences (a friend suggesting that we see a particular movie) and ends at the other extreme with destructive influences such as indoctrinating a person to kill himself or harm others (Jonestown)." p. 44, Combating Cult Mind Control by Steven Hasaan.
In the case of sr/esoterictalks.com, obviously people are not induced to literally kill themselves, but they are subtly persuaded to tolerate James' affairs, divorce their spouses, ignore their parents (especially if the parents are speaking badly about James), tolerate him flirting with their wives, tithe to James, tolerate verbal put-downs, tolerate the complete lack of financial transparency and accountability, tolerating the abuse and put-downs toward others without speaking up, mandatory attendance at meetings... and it's all in the name of following God. It's not that all parents and other family members are cut off, only those who speak up about the group are. Talking negative about James or sr/esoterictalks.com is punished by withdrawing from those people. Those people either learn to shut up, or if they refuse to shut up they live without love and affection from the sr member.
"How are people recruited into sr/esoterictalks.com?"
Keep in mind that there have been ZERO new members to the Vista group in over 20 years. If new people come around, they do not stay for long. The Vista group has been slowly dwindling and is down to Rex, Patty, Steve, Tammy, Jess, Diana, Lorrie, Curtis.
James has attracted a whole new group of followers via the internet. His podcasts are distributed in iTunes so they reach a vast audience there. He has always had an "edgy" approach to spirituality, and this is attractive to people for various reasons. He also has a very soothing voice and is an excellent orator. He is quite skilled at the power of suggestion, and is familiar with a wide variety of spiritual disciplines.
The initial appeal is in relation to people's desire for advanced spirituality. He often quotes from Gurdjieff, when G spoke of people "wanting more." When James uses this quote, this is to assure the person that they are on the right track. Of course it is never mentioned that the very desire for "something more" is in itself a neutral thing; in other words, it could lead the person to something harmful if the person is not careful and discerning.
He quickly turns on the charm and flattery, which either sets the hook, or repels, depending on the inner state of the person. People with low self esteem will be smitten with him; people with higher self esteem will probably be repelled.
Always remember too that the power of suggestion is an insidious thing; his skill there cannot be underestimated. The more one talks to James, the more information he has. The more information he has, the more he can use his powers of suggestion to create an illusion that the person has made certain headway, had certain insights, made the right decisions, etc. As mentioned previously, he is also very good at creating the conditions for "snapping," which is the psychological high created after certain events.
Frankly, the world is a scary place. One of the appeals of James and sr is that they offer a sort of refuge from the world. The shelter provided there is quite real, but it comes at a price.
Who ARE you???? I know exactly what you mean about laughing at how you were so scared to leave. I had the same experience after one year only. Like my life would fall apart without James, or I would fall into this black hole. WHich I did for a while, but the light that came after THAT darkness was so revealing, so healing, the rewards of leaving are immense! I also cannot believe why I was so scared to pull the plug...
I'm sorry to hear about Pat. He made her out to be a horrible woman, the little general he called her. Once I objected to her being abused and the whole group laughed at me as if I was crazy.
It figures that James would misuse a Gurdjieff quote to put people down. Gurdjieff also said:"No-one can imitate me", but I guess James doesn't use that quote often.
What exactly do you mean by edgy? Also you write that he is an excellent orator and skilled in the power of suggestibility. Yes, this is very true. I wonder though, HOW did he get these skills? Are they a result of his own abuse, that he has been able to acquire them so well? Did he study somewhere?
ALso, you say he is familiar with many spiritual disciplines. About that I want to add, he is only familiar at a superficial level. His podcasts are all the same, never anything new. And if you ask him about deeper ideas of Gurdjieff he just doesn't know anything about it. He skims the top of every spiritual discipline and parades this knowledge and uses it to reel in anyone he can from a whole range of life. He might know a lot of stuff, but it's all empty 'fractured' knowledge. I caught him lying many many times, bluffing about things he knew. When I confronted him with his inconsistencies he would always get angry, saying I always had to be right. Where that may be true, he also didn't know shit about the deeper works of Gurdjieff, the Sufi's (who he said were a radical movement of islam!), the essenes, the gnostics, AND many more! He only knows a fraction, but he parades it so well it LOOKS like he knows a lot.
It's also his game, to make us believe he knows things. I have caught him on a lie about something he said he knew about. I argued and said it was not the case. The next day he had obviously done some research online and came back for revanche to make sure he was 'right' again. I didn't believe he could be this childish, but it happened so often. He borrows things you say and trumps you with it!
You mention a refuge these people have in SR. It reminded me of something I read in The Seven Mansions, Brian Cleeve's 2nd book:
"In human warfare there remain oases of peace where even the rumours of war fail to penetrate, and to a soldier stumbling on one of these, the temptation to remain there can be very great. He may tell himself that this is how a man was intended to live, sowing and reaping, and not killing his fellow men. He may be made welcome by the peaceful inhabitants amid decide to remain there, and desert his army and his comrades.
The same thing can happen in the real universe. The spirit may stumble on just such an apparent oasis, and even believe that he has discovered paradise, that this is where he is meant to stay. The spirits he will find there will not disillusion him. That is not their task in existence. Or they may be evil spirits who are delighted to receive him into their company, and to conceal their real nature from him until he is fully in their power."
In essence, James and SR do the very same thing. It might be a refuge, but this is no time to be sitting in refuge, this is a time to be awake and aware and fight evil with any means we have.
Ok, bearing in mind there have been no new followers the past 20 years apart from a few internet catches, he still got to manage the lives of all these families for 20 years. God knows what damage he has done to these people and their children. Just because he's didn't cause a mass suicide, doesn't mean he's not just as evil and dedicated to the destruction of mankind as another reknown cult-leader.
Another question: You mention he does his best to get the men to stay. Is that because they are the ones paying him the money? Not so much money coming from the women? Or is it some father-abuse compensation thing?
Let's also not forget all those podcast people around the world paying for his trips and travel. There are quite a few of those and there number is growing. He gets to use his book of tricks safely over great distances, no-one to stop him. He can test things out on them and see who is willing and who is not without the hassle of meeting them in person. This way he has access to many potential victims in a short space of time.
There will always be those who are willing to pay for his free holidays and expenses as he teaches them absolutely NOTHING in return.
I've been with him abroad, I know what he teaches. It's a joke. It's kids play and they all fall for it. It was like the hysteria you see in some 'praise the lord' churches. It just goes to show how desperate people are to find something real in their lives, that they are taken in so easily.
I cannot provide any answers regarding "why" he does what he does, because I don't know. I'm not a shrink. And I don't care about why. The "why" question will make you crazy, because who can really say? And even when you get your answer, what changes? Is the damage undone if we understand "why"? No, it isn't.
A huge chunk of the energy of solid rock vista/esoterictalks.com is people in the group diagnosing themselves and each other. In other words, they chase their tails trying to figure out why they do what they do (except when it comes to their involvement with James). I recommend being concerned only with the "what" and the "how." In other words, the results (aka fruit) and how those results are achieved. This is my tact and frankly I think it's far more effective. Remember that ALL of this is narcissistic supply, but especially the "why" posts. "Why does he do this????!!!" plays right into his hand, so I suggest we all refrain from asking why. It's just not useful to our cause. Name calling is part of this; it's an immature attempt at a diagnosis. Stop the name calling; stop asking why. Start thinking very carefully about the what and the how, and I mean in very specific terms with what you have personally experienced. Then come back and write about it. This will be extremely useful to those who are sincerely seeking answers.
Agreed. The name calling should stop. It was used initially to get things rolling, but now it is no longer necessary. The why questions do drive you crazy.
Let me try again: I don't want to talk about James (his background, his education, his reasons for doing what he does, etc.) because I don't see how it is useful. And it puts the focus on him, which is what he wants.
Instead, I want us to talk about the results of his efforts, the pain we have seen, the pain we perhaps caused others due to James' influence, the pain we allowed into others lives due to our own inaction and fear. I think that if we focus on these things, rather than on James himself, it will be better in the long run. I hope this clarifies my stance. I don't want anybody to feel like I don't care about their questions, but I do think it's important to ask the right questions.
Yes we did! But you are right. Our goal really is to help others with answers they might be looking for. In the beginning we were just very angry a lot at all that had happened. So we lashed out at anyone because it wasn't clear to us how this worked.
We need to make this a safe space for seekers. My questions about why James does what he does are indeed fruitless. We can never know the answer. I guess my mind just 'has' to know everything.....
"Most people will reject something if it is only negative all of the time. So cults can't be 100% bad. Are there any genuinely good things to a cult that draw people in?"
Yes, there are many benefits to being in a cult. The cult provides a level of security and structure. As mentioned previously, there is a genuine shelter from the world that can be had in such a group. It is an instant "family" - you'll always have people to help you move, help you remodel your house, help you build a house, help you with repairs.
If there are multiple families with children, you will all raise you kids together so there is a lot of support there. You'll have free babysitters in exchange for you providing babysitting services. You'll have others there to discipline your children when you're not doing it; likewise you can discipline others' kids.
If both parties in a marrige are committed to the group, their marriage will stay intact at least in an outward way, enabling you to avoid the pain and expense of a divorce. You will appear to be the good Christian family that attends church every Sunday.
You'll have a place to spend holidays. This is especially nice if you have no other family neaby.
If it is a religiously fundamental cult, as a woman you may learn to cook, sew, and keep a home.
Depending on the cult, you may get to feel as though you are on the cutting edge of something very new and exciting. The sense of feeling spiritually special might be very appealing to certain types of people depending on their background or other personal factors.
Depending on the size of your tithe, you may pay less in taxes due writing it off as a charitable contribution. Going into debt will be discouraged, especially credit card debt.
You can safely ignore people's objections to your involvement with the group, and this means you'll have less responsibility toward those people. This is especially useful if you are otherwise angry at those people - you won't ever have to deal with that anger, and you can safely avoid those people on the basis of them negative about the group.
If you are in the leadership position you will receive free services such as gardening, home repairs, etc. This might go on for 20 or more years. These services equate to legal tax free income that never needs to be claimed on any tax form.
This is what I find most infuriating. No-one takes any responsibility because James tell them it's best to ignore us since there's no point in dealing with people who are negative.
He did the same to me on a one on one. If I didn't like what he was saying he would just hang up, time and time again! Like a little kid. It astonished me. He said I was being negative because I didn't agree. ANd that I was abusing him.
Also all the other people I talked to don't talk to us anymore either. Like James World is completely sealed off to the outside world. I tried to get through to another member, but James had gotten to him first and there was no way in hell he would talk to me about this. I couldn't say a word about James, and back then it was just criticism, nothing like what we are writing today. Anyway, it drove me insane. I doubted my sanity because he got everyone against me purposely. He changed facts and events to suit his reality. He just went ahead and changed things and to back it up he got the others to agree with him.
He plays this game ALL the time. I don't think, in hindsight, that there was ever a moment he wasn't playing a game with me.
You will always be considered the best student as long as you are the major tither.
All of the details of your thinking will be corrected if you are open and honest about them.
If or when bad things happen to people after they leave, you can safely attribute this to them leaving.
When bad things happen when you’re in the group, attribute this to your own lack of effort or committment. Same goes when bad things happen to other members in the group - blame it on their own lack of effort or committment.
When bad things happen to people who’ve never been in your group, attribute this to them never being in the group.
If you ever have thoughts to leave, focus your attention on those who left, specifically on the ones where bad things happened. This will help you stay in the group. The leader will help you with this.
You’ll always have a place to confess your sins. You can even do it publically and this will help you feel very spiritual because the leader will approve, and the other members will feel jealous.
Don’t ever fear of marrying the wrong person - the cult won’t let this happen. The cult will ensure that you only marry the right person. Even if you later deeply feel that something is seriously wrong with the marriage, just ignore those feelings, for your entire life if necessary. The cult isn’t wrong, you are.
Unlike with a new job, a new dating partner, a business deal, etc. you won’t need to do any research on your cult or its leader. The benefit here is that the cult is affirming your capacity for decision making without outside influence.
Get the respect from your family you deserve. If your family or friends object to the cult, blame them for controlling you. Show humility only to the cult and its leader, not toward your own family. By so doing you will teach your family to shut up about the cult, and they will fear... oops, I mean respect you for this.
One of the most wonderful benefits of cult membership is subjective morality. For example, if you’re a woman you can have an affair with the leader. It can be a physical one or an emotional one, or both. Connie won’t object, and neither will your husband.
When you are the newcomer to the group, you will be placed on a pedestal. The leader will give you special attention and a special place of authority in the group - you will feel like his “right hand man” or woman as the case may be. This will give you a sense of power over the old-timers and will help to solidify your loyalty to the leader. It will be a wonderful experience, in part because you will feel sure that you are the first person this has happened to.
If you are one of the lucky women chosen to have an affair with the leader, the other women will feel jealous of you. This will give you a definite sense of power over them - it’s quite exhilarating! Who cares about their feelings anyway?
Never fear the wrath of your husband if you have an affair with the leader - remember, loyalty to the leader comes first, and this applies to husbands as well as wives. Your husband will accept it as a lesson in forgiveness, and he’ll forgive the leader far more quickly than he’ll forgive you. Don’t take it personally - it’s a test of his loyalty to the leader. YOUR test of loyalty is in keeping the affair a secret from your husband for as long as possible. The leader and his wife will fully support you in this endeavor.
The leader’s wife may cry and complain about the affair, and even threaten to divorce him, but don’t let this distract you. She has seen this all before, so it’s nothing new to her. Take it all in good fun because it’s part of the “solid rock vista/esoteric talks” show!
Are you saying that Connie is in on the affairs? Or does she just accept she has them? I mean, do they plan this together, like conartists do? Just wondering ..
that's a great question. At this point I would have to say that she's in on it. One affair could be forgiven (in theory. In reality many people can't even handle one affair). But at least four affairs? And people still question or doubt her complicity? "Oh poor Connie" my ass.
Here's another thing: as long as other women desire her husband, it means he's special and desirable. It's called "social proof."
Actually both of them were well-rehearsed in their acting skills. James even told me once he was an actor. I was talking to James on skype and he was so-called upset about me and my husband being together since he 'loved' me so much and I was the only woman in the world for him and this was a one time opportunity and I should take it bla bla bla.. I had always found it strange that he would fall for me, a woman half his age, in europe, married with three kids but at the same time as anonymous has written recently, being the 'chosen one' gives you a certain sense of power. I KNEW however that something about this was fake and wrong.
Anyway, back to the crying: He would pretend to be upset and then would excuse himself, walk away and within range from his computer would start sob very loudly and theatrically. He would return and say: You didn't hear that did you? Of course I heard it, and of course I was meant to, because he was playing me constantly. I knew it instinctively but chose to believe he was sincere. I could kick myself for being so stupid!
Connie cried hysterically too online for me to hear. James sat there smuggly as his women fought for him and he hung up so he could comfort her. Only to return in minutes to tell me she was now fine ( she was now vacuuming the living-room).
It was like this from the beginning the very day he declared his 'love' to me. THat was so fake and exaggerated too. Now I realize that it was all a ploy to get some excitement out of his new victim, free trips and ego-stroking!
This is a warning to all future women who might think they really are the CHOSEN one. He has done this countless times before and DOES NOT LOVE YOU.
So even though there are no new followers he is still a threat to unsuspecting potential followers and can cause great damage to their lives. I had the fortune to have an understanding husband who saw what happened and realized I was not myself. My actions caused a lot of pain and sadness to a lot of people including my family and children.
THis is why with your help we need to expose this man in every facet of his bahaviour so that it will be recognized more quickly the next time it happens.
James lied to me countless times, made me doubt my instincts, made me confess things in the hope that my husband would leave me, told me my children were not mine but God's and I should give them up, said my husband was a killer and was cheating on me and would continue to do so if I went back, drew me into his world of sick sexual perversion (over which I could write a whole book!) all because he claimed I was repressed and he could 'help' me.
Within two days of contact with this man, I found myself on a high that lasted weeks. I lost weight, I didn't need anything but contact. Within days I was addicted. Everyone saw the change, but I fought them on this. Looking back I was a completely different person and discovered a side of myself I never knew I had..
"Likeable," "Charming," "Intelligent," "Alert," "Impressive," "Confidence-inspiring," and "A great success with the ladies": These are the sorts of descriptions repeatedly used by Cleckley in his famous case-studies of psychopaths. They are also, of course, "irresponsible," "self-destructive," and the like. These descriptions highlight the great frustrations and puzzles that surround the study of psychopathy.
Psychopaths seem to have in abundance the very traits most desired by normal persons. The untroubled self-confidence of the psychopath seems almost like an impossible dream and is generally what "normal" people seek to acquire when they attend assertiveness training classes. In many instances, the magnetic attraction of the psychopath for members of the opposite sex seems almost supernatural.
We've always suggested James is a psychopath, but reading this he could be more sociopathic than psychopathic:
Sociopathy is chiefly characterized by something wrong with the person's conscience. They either don't have one, it's full of holes like Swiss cheese, or they are somehow able to completely neutralize or negate any sense of conscience or future time perspective. Sociopaths only care about fulfilling their own needs and desires - selfishness and egocentricity to the extreme. Everything and everybody else is mentally twisted around in their minds as objects to be used in fulfilling their own needs and desires. They often believe they are doing something good for society, or at least nothing that bad. The term "sociopath" is frequently used by psychologists and sociologists alike in referring to persons whose unsocialized character is due primarily to parental failures (usually fatherlessness) rather than inherent features of temperament. However, this may only describe the "common sociopath", as there are at least four (4) different subtypes -- common, alienated, aggressive, and dyssocial. Commons are characterized mostly by their lack of conscience; the alienated by their inability to love or be loved; aggressives by a consistent sadistic streak; and dyssocials by an ability to abide by gang rules, as long as those rules are the wrong rules. Some common sociopathic traits include:
Egocentricity; Callousness; Impulsivity; Conscience defect; Exaggerated sexuality; Excessive boasting; Risk taking; Inability to resist temptation; Antagonistic, deprecating attitude toward the opposite sex; Lack of interest in bonding with wife
Guggenbuhl-Craig states that " they are very talented at appearing much more humble than the average person, but are hardly so." Some are also able to feign concern about the lower classes and profess that they are on the side of the underdog, the poor, and so forth. A psychopath may claim, for instance (if he's from a low socioeconomic class), that he dislikes rich people intensely, but at the same time, he will inwardly yearn and envy what they have. He is like the narcissist, desiring to reflect a false image of himself through his possessions. Among his possessions are included human beings: girlfriends, wives, and children.
Some psychopaths can even be very fond of animals (contrary to the common viewpoint), but still view them as objects in relation to themselves.
In general, most psychopaths will brag endlessly about their exploits and "bad" things they've done (often called a warning sign, which will ward off careful souls), but more often than not, the woman who is fascinated by him will not listen to reason, even if she is warned by others who know him about his past behaviors.
Why? Once again, because the psychopath makes her feel so "special."
James fits EVERY single description of psychopathy/sociopathy. It's just stunning to see how his personality matches every one of these personality disorders...
Here is the logic of esoteric talks (formerly solid rock vista):
1. "The work" doesn’t feel good.
2. Solid rock doesn’t feel good.
3. Therefore solid rock is "the work."
This leaves the door wide open to verbal abuse - after all, "the work" doesn’t feel good, remember? Just take whatever James dishes out - it proves how hard you’re "working" and what a good student you are.
I've been reading this blog for some time now. I was also involved with James at some point. It never occured to me he could be psychopathic, there was just something so shady and 'wrong' about him. But reading this, it's so obvious he just hasn't got a soul.
It was amusing to read how you ( the blog writer) wrote that he told you you were the only woman he ever loved, so special, so wonderful etc. Those were his words to me too. What idiots us women are! It's a classic.
Also the sexual perversions mentioned I recognize. He had a real taste for the absurd. I was the 'chosen one' too for a while as long as I was doing what he wanted me to, but as soon as I started objecting he turned nasty and it was over. He made me out to be some slut who slept around with everyone and who didn't 'get' it.
In a weird way it's comforting somehow to read all this. I suspected he was evil but couldn't put my finger on it.
I suffered from low-esteem and was an approval-seeker. He seemed like a dream-come-true.
THanks for your post. Sorry to hear about your involvement with James. Yes, women are particularly vulnerable to his approach, but on the other hand, the 'snapping' techniques he uses explain at least some of the attraction. I just posted a quote from something I found online about psychopaths and women and how they seem to find these types irresistable.
James has the potential to pick up women all the time on facebook/xanga or wherever he's hanging out these days. Most of those he writes to are women and he flirts with all of them. They have absolutely NO idea what they are dealing with. THey think he's a sexy spiritual guy with a nice with way words...
The woman I am most worried about is Susan. She's completely hooked, he has been involved in her relationship with her husband. She's completely in adoration and won't hear one word against him. He has her right where he wants her. We've pleaded with her countless times on facebook, in the very beginning she was willing, but soon James got to her and she shut us all down. James said he had to protect her from us ( he called us terrorists!) and all our hate and negativity. He said she was an innocent creature who would be wounded by the vileness of our attacks. Wow. How projectory...
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #1
Mr. and Mrs. S were members in the early years of the group. They and their family were subject to a tremendous amount of abuse. They were among the more wealthy of the group, and I estimate they gave thousands and thousands of dollars to the "church." I am not at liberty to say how much, because I don’t know the actual total, but I know that it was a tremendous sum and even my conservative estimate would shock most people.
One event that stands out in my mind right now regarding Mr. and Mrs. S is when James instigated all of the men to deface their property. They painted a large handicapped symbol onto the pavement of Mr. and Mrs. S driveway. This is not a photo their defacement, but it looked like this:
As I recall, the men got the colors reversed, painting the white where it should have been blue and the blue where it should have been white. I also recall that they somehow managed to blame Mr. S for this mistake.
The symbol was about 4 feet wide by about 6 feet long, and they picked the location very carefully: they placed it exactly where Mr. S parked his car.
I remember all of the men laughing about it. In fact we all laughed, I am ashamed to admit.
Questions:
Why did the men agree to defacing somebody’s property?
If any of the men secretly objected, why do you think they remained silent? Had any of them openly objected, what might have been the result to them personally? Do you think an objection would have stopped the event from happening?
Do you think they considered how this would make Mr. and Mrs. S feel, or their children?
Do you think Mr. and Mrs. S had the symbol removed while they were still in the group, or after they left? If you think it was after they left, why do you think they waited?
Should we care about the expense they incurred to remove the symbol? Do you think James and the men reimbursed them for this expense?
What should current members’ reaction be to the memory of this event? What do you think their reaction actually has been over the years? If any of them read this now, what do you think their reaction will be? Will they shoot the messenger or will they repent?
What I want to know is why has it taken so long for this man to be exposed? Is it because of the podcasts? That he's attracting attention again? Why did no-one come forward back then?
It's not an accusation by the way, I'm just wondering what has changed that people are only now telling their stories.
Maybe it's because of the accessibility of internet?
That's right, no internet then. We left before it got that ugly, never thought it would go that far, but we feared for our family and walked. I thank God that He gave me the courage to leave those who had become my extended family, knowing they would all shun me. At the time, James still claimed to be, or tried to be a Christian, but the pattern was already set for the horrors that followed. The people who started SR were good people, but as time went by some gave James more and more power over their lives, particularly those who came out of the defunct discipleship movement. I remember telling him "they would follow you anywhere and push you right into hell in the process". Not to excuse James for his sordid ways and choices but he did not sin on his own.
Hello anonymous, Just wondering, What is the defunct discipleship movement? I'm sure there are more people within the group who sinned with him, but having seen James at work, he is one hell of a master of manipulation, it is true they choose to accept this way of life with him, but personally I believe he is responsible for dragging potentially good souls into the darkness. That is what evil is and does. An evil spirit can bring down other souls that may have chosen differently if they had not encountered James. There is no excuse and people must be responsible for their actions, but this blog is not about how much of all this is him, this is about what he has done single handedly, breaking up marriages and families, lying and manipulating, conning and extortion.
These ARE sins he committed on his own, I have been a witness to this.
I agree, he uses his supposed spiritual authority to cover up his manipulative games. Read up on the discipleship movement which I could not explain in a few words. Then you will understand that it was the last thing they should have implemented with the group. In the beginning, we were all attending other churches as well as SR and James had another good Pastor for covering, in fact, several. Had things continued that way there would not have been a cult. The next thing that came was isolation from the Christian community, perfect set up for a cult. Because my husband and children mattered to me more than James did, I left relatively early on, but after Larry and Judy, though we almost followed them then. James, from his own words, was fighting his need for worship and adoration. He did not do all this single handedly, but with the encouragement of some. Evil got him back, and yes, he dragged many into the pit. He also let women know he had a problem with sexual temptation. We should have all heeded the warning and not given in to his puppy eyes, and certainly walked away at the first sign of verbal abuse or sexual innuendo.
A common error is to think that ‘narcissistic supply’ consists only of admiration, adulation and positive feedback. Actually, being feared, or derided is also supply. The main element is ATTENTION. James needs attention constantly.
He feeds of other people, who hurl back at him an image that he projects to them. This is their sole function in his world: to reflect, to admire, to admire, to applaud, to detest – in a word, to assure him that he exists.
In short: His group must magnify the narcissist, echo and amplify his life, his views, his knowledge, his history…
James comes from a very low social economic background with a severely abusive parent. These are the exact circumstances needed to create a psychopath. He is most envious of those richest or more in power or potentially more powerful than he is.
Like Charles Manson, James wants the women all to want him and claims this is the case, he wants all the men to admire him and also claims this is so. About Mr S ( when I confronted him on this back in june) James said a couple of very nasty things, making it seem like Mr S inflicted this on himself and deserved what he got. In fact everyone who turns on him or sees who he is becomes the object of his anger and wrath.
To the anonymous writer who wrote Connie was in on it: Is it possible she just can't escape the psychological trap? Or do you think they both plot to bring people down?
THanks anonymous for the link. I read the article and to be honest James displays characteristics of both personality disorders. I'm no psychologist.
The defining characteristic of the narcissist is grandiosity. The defining characteristic of the sociopath/psychopath is callousness. The narcissist is more likely to be attention seeking, envious and to desire admiration. The sociopath/psychopath is more likely to engage in illegal activity, to be aggressive, impulsive and deceitful.
James has both. Maybe he is both? Any ideas Anonymous?
"Is it possible she just can't escape the psychological trap? Or do you think they both plot to bring people down?"
Can't or won't? Although I do believe they are all in a double bind, on some level they are acquiescing, and they know it, including Connie. It's just easier to stay than to leave. Since they don't perceive that any actual harms are being done to others, staying doesn't effect their consciences.
In their world, other people are NOT being harmed by James or their support of him. Remember this, because it's HUGE.
My own experience is that I had to keep on suppressing my real emotions (which he called false..) so that I would not incur his wrath. A couple of times I challenged him to a discussion about some of the crap things he was saying and also to confront him on his lies and inconsistencies, and the anger I met was horrendous. His mask fell and a whole new James would appear. That experience was so startling and disturbing I just didn't want to go there so I started to keep things to myself. I think this is what the other members probably do aswell.
Their fear of leaving is so great, it stunts them.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #2
Today I want to highlight a common practice at solid rock, called “scapegoating”:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scapegoating
From the article:
“Scapegoating is the practice of singling out any party for unmerited negative treatment or blame.”
Nearly every person in the group is scapegoated at one time or another, all except James of course. However there is one person who merits special attention, in my opinion, and that person is Judy, Jennifer’s mother.
Judy is an interesting person, because she is the only woman in the group’s history who never succumbed to James’ flattery and sexual innuendo. By resisting James, he never came between her and her husband Larry. She, her husband, and her other daughter left in 1988 but James’ vitriol for her has continued unabated into the present time, with her name and her husband’s name (Larry) coming up in conversation on a regular, if infrequent, basis.
James referred to her as a spider. He never referred to her in positive terms, and his influence lead to Jennifer’s estrangement from her for over 20 years. This impacted not only Judy’s relationship with Jennifer, but with her son-in-law Jess and their children.
Questions:
Why did James villainize Judy for over two decades after her departure? Do you think there is a relationship between James villainizing Judy, Jennifer’s estrangement from Judy, and James affair with Jennifer?
Does Jess have a role here? If so, what?
All of the current members are aware of these events. What do you think they think about them? Current members include Connie Parkinson, Steve Filippo, Tammie Filippo, Jess Thieme, Diana Blanc, Lorrie York, Curtis Taylor, Rex Christensen, and Pat Christensen.
Yes, i recognize this pattern of scapegoating. It occurs amongst all those who have done something to 'wrong' James. If james senses a person is onto him or that they are not inclined to see things his way, they will somehow be singled out and ridiculed/scapegoated/ganged up on.
Also he will deny this if accused. He will tell you are imagining it or that you are too sensitive or that you are abusing him, anything to divert attention Fromm what he is doing. It's called gas lighting ( see link in favorites)
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #3
A common theme at the group is one of blaming the victim for their own suffering and for the harms that befall them. It’s called the Just World Hypothesis. Here is an article that I think is quite relevant to the worldview of the group:
The entire article is fascinating in light of the group’s dynamics and history. Here is a quote that sums it up well:
“The belief in a just world may take the place of a genuine commitment to justice. For some people, it is simply easier to assume that forces beyond their control mete out justice. When that occurs, the result may be the abdication of personal responsibility, acquiescence in the face of suffering and misfortune, and indifference towards injustice. Taken to the extreme, indifference can result in the institutionalization of injustice.”
I have a two very specific examples highlighting the institutionalization of injustice that I have seen at the group:
1. Nobody in the group visited Michele in the hospital after she had a heart attack. James said we would be enabling her if we visited, so none of us went, not even her own husband. She was in the hospital for over a week.
2. Danny had a terrible motorcycle accident after he and his family left the group. James said it was because Danny left and was no longer under the group’s spiritual protection.
Questions:
How do you think Michele and Danny felt about these events and how James and the group interpreted them?
After reading the article, can you think of other examples when we blamed the victim for their suffering? Is it right to call ourselves Christians with this worldview? What about Luke 13:4?
This world view explains just about everything this group stand for. Their lack of personal responsibility, their scapegoating others, their total lack of sense of justice for the people who have obviously been abused by James. This is not about upholding the principles of this Just World View, this is about James being and staying the focus of attention..
People are uncomfortable believing that suffering is random, that sometimes bad things happen for no reason at all. Instead, we prefer to believe that people must have done something to deserve what they get. This is obviously a reassuring and comforting belief, which explains its wide appeal. (If bad things only happen to those who deserve it, and I’m a good person, then I can be sure that nothing bad will happen to me.) Belief in the just world can be thought of as a failure to apply the null hypothesis in the moral domain: rejecting the explanation of chance, we prefer to believe that everything that happens is deserved. But the problem is that, however much we’d prefer to believe otherwise, the world is random and sometimes bad things do happen for no reason. And because it encourages us to look down on victims of misfortune as deserving their fate, the just world hypothesis usually leads to worse injustices.
People believing that people 'deserve' what they get is a dangerous road to tread. It's true that suffering is often self-inflicted, for example when one makes a terrible error and suffers because of it. But the need for suffering is necessary for all mankind. It's our way to oneness. Our need to understand things. By making mistakes we learn.
Feeling that someone deserves to get cancer or some other mishap is very self-righteous and arrogant. And even people who do seem to get what they deserve must be treated kindly and good-willed, because the next time it could be us and you would hope that someone out there would help you if you were in need. Helping others, humility and being selfless is important for our spiritual growth. We still have much to learn.
This just world view is very disturbing. People will turn their backs and cause even greater injustices. How can you not care for people who are suffering? How can you stand there and say it's their own fault? This is absolutely tyrannical and nothing about it is at all according to true christianity.
Personally I have no problem with condemning James Parkinson for what he has done and I would rejoice if he was removed from humanity. He is a menace injuring people and hindering their spiritual road. He is a callous being who enjoys inflicting pain and suffering on others. He should not be pitied or consoled, but fought tooth and nail so he is unable to spread his disease. I believe one must fight for things very important and not lay back and wait for things to happen. Complacency is killing.
I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth.
I believe in Jesus Christ, God's only Son, our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried; he descended into hell. On the third day he rose again; he ascended into heaven, he is seated at the right hand of the Father, and he will come to judge the living and the dead.
I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (Esoteric Talks) - #4
The people of the group believe that nobody is ever harmed, and I mean this in an objective sense. There is no actual harm done to people from outside of themselves, because they choose to be harmed. A common phrase one hears as a member of the group is “You just want to be a victim.”
One phrase that is not discussed is “You just want to be a perpetrator.” Seems logical, doesn’t it? If it’s true that some want to be victims, then it must also be true that others want to be perpetrators. Let’s take, for example, a leader who has repeated sexual affairs with married women, and he himself is married. If the women just want to be victims, then it stands to reason that the married man having these multiple affairs wants to be the perpetrator. But this side of the coin is never discussed.
The truly brilliant result is that it immediately raises their pride: “You just want to be a victim.” “No I don’t!” This person is now set on a trajectory to constantly prove how much they don’t want to be a victim. This includes tolerating massive amounts of verbal and emotional abuse in order to prove that one doesn’t want to be a victim. One is is constantly “working” to prove they’re not a victim, and all of that “work” is founded in pride, in a desire to prove otherwise.
There is no correct answer to the statement, “You just want to be a victim.” If you answer, “No I don’t,” or “Yes I do,” you’ve fallen into the trap. If you answer, “You just want to be a perpatrator,” you’ve fallen into the trap. Think about the world view of the person who says, “You just want to be a victim.” Such a person is saying three things:
1. You are God. You completely control what happens to you and others. You are in complete control of this situation, even as we speak. 2. You are using your God powers to hurt yourself. 3. You can learn to use your God powers better.
“You just want to be a victim.” Can you feel the lure? You just received a challenge. The challenge goes even further than this, because if you walk away from the challenge by not answering, the rebuttal is that you must REALLY LOVE to be a victim, and, you aren’t serious about your spiritual development or “the work.”
Imagine yourself as a person interested in spiritual things, seeking “something more,” yet walking away from this engagement without answering or even looking back. Could you?
"For I delivered to you that which I also received: that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures, and that He was buried, and that he rose again on the third day according to the scriptures...
Now if Christ is preached that He has been raised from the dead, how do some among you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? But if there is no resurrection of the dead, then Christ is not risen. And if Christ is not risen, then our preaching is empty and your faith is also empty.
Yes, we are found false witnesses of God, because we have testified of God that he raised up Christ, whom He did not raise up- if in fact the dead are not raised... and if Christ is not risen, your faith is futile.
The spiritual is not first, but the natural, and afterward the spirutual."
What is the gnostic reply to this verse? I'll tell you: they do not have one. They claim Jesus, and they claim to be much closer to true Christianity than orthodox Christians.... except there's this tiny detail called "the resurrection" that is spiritualized away in gnostic teaching. Which is fine, really. Except then they can no longer believe in Christ's literal resurrection, since the dead are not raised under gnostic teaching.
So to you solid rockers who still want to believe in Jesus' literal resurrection: you need to think very carefully about participating in gnostic groups and reading gnostic texts. Gnosticism is against Christ's literal, bodily resurrection. And isn't His resurrection the very heart of Christianity? Why call yourself a Christian if you no longer believe in the resurrection? It's quite meaningless to do so.
Return to your first love, which is certainly Christ crucified and resurrected!
James told me of I left I would commit suicide.... still here. I left anyways and felt free, light and on my own path whether it was a good one or bad it was my path. I am a single women and he said to stay in the group I'd have to be like Lorrie. Celabite (except with him perhaps) and childless and unmarried. I wanted a life and a relationship. After I left je called me and told me I should come back that it was ok if I fucked people. I realized that he wanted me to be completely devoted to him so all my love goes to him but casual sex on the side would be tolerated. Sick.
This sounds familiar anonymous. Another of his tactics to keep people bound to him. He told me my husband would leave me and I would end up alone. He said if I didn't marry him I would never evolve and would always stay asleep. Still here.. Still married, much more awake than I ever was.... :D
Yes, he wants his women single or celibate. He would hang up in the middle of a conversation if he found out I was having relations with my husband. He said he was possessive and that I should stop doing that or he would not speak to me. I did stop. For a year!
Like you, he wanted all my devotion, my adoration. Talking about suicide, James talked about it a lot. He said he would commit suicide if he didn't 'get' me. He also said he would close a suicide pact with me. When I told him I didn't believe in suicide as an option (hat it was spiritually speaking one of the worst things you could do) he dismissed me and my beliefs as rigid and primitive.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #5
Throughout the years, James will occassionally withdraw from people. Typically, something happens and the cohesion of the group is threatened. He starts complaining about not being their teacher anymore; talks about moving away; starting a new group elsewhere; saying he’s not appreciated; saying how misunderstood he is; talking about the abuse of teachers and how badly abused he is; saying he is going to “work” with or without them; and generally retreating for a period of time. In recent years this includes taking down his online presence.
He would often conduct one of his public polls during these times, and the reaction from group members is predictable. These “retreats” are a test of members’ loyalty and always served as a catalyst for renewed commitment to him. I hope you can tell that I am using the word “retreat” to indicate a withdrawal, a pulling back.
Whenever it happened, we all gathered around him (quite literally) to console him. We would tell him how much we appreciated him, how wonderful he is, how much we would miss him, how much we want him to be our teacher, etc. If there is an obvious person who is the cause of all this (it’s usually not a current member but it can be), we would disown that person in various ways to show our loyalty to James such as gossiping about the person, and lots of discussion about how unconscious the person is, how unaware the person is of how wonderful he and the group are. We were quite incredulous, “How could the person be so asleep? They just don’t understand. What a shame.” The member, whether ex or current, knows they are being gossiped about. Gossip is a huge component of the group’s dynamic. They don’t call it gossip, of course. It’s just a discussion about the person in order to learn more about “the work.” In other words, they use the person’s supposed “weakness” as an example of what not to do.
Gathering at James’ and Connie’s home for hours and hours at a time during one of these “retreats” was quite common. Current members sitting at home during one of these retreat/withdrawal periods were obviously not serious about “the work” were not considered part of the core of the group. (Jockying to be part of the core of the group is favorite pasttime.) Many times throughout the years, but especially during these times, we would quote John 6:68 in showing what good students we are and how much we need him as a teacher: "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”
After a period of time, he would receive a message from God telling him something “new.” (For example, I remember that after one of these “retreats” of his, God told him about a Fifth Way.) After he hears from God and receives this new message, during one of the meetings there will be a group “snapping” experience (described elsewhere on this blog - there’s also a book by the same name that describes this experience). After they’ve all had the confirmation that he’s still supposed to be their teacher (aka snapping), the cycle begins again. He is now the renewed teacher, and the students feel reaffirmed in their commitment to him.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #6
Below is a link to an article that discusses why we may make poor choices at times. Sometimes it can be because others around us are making poor choices. At the moment I’m thinking specifically of James’ polls, where he questioned each person about their commitment to him, the group, and/or the ideas. It was pubic and everybody had to answer. He’d start at one side of the room and work his way, one by one, to the other side of the room.
These polls were always done with everybody present, and each person had to answer. There were many, many of these polls done throughout the years, probably at least several times a year. There was never any notice that a poll would be done - they were always done randomly without warning. The shocking thing to me now is that we all answered in lock step every single time, and it was always in the affirmative. Why is this? This article offers an explanation. It’s something called Normative Social Influence:
“Normative social influence is one form of conformity. It is the influence of other people that leads us to conform in order to be liked and accepted by them. This often leads to public compliance—but not necessarily private acceptance—of the group's social norms.”
There was always a lot of talk about how free everybody was to leave, and also about how devoted to truth the group was, but we NEVER talked about the polls. We never openly questioned why James did them, how we felt about them, or what their purpose was. We just participated in them, and when they were over we carried on as if nothing had happened. Looking back now I can see that they were obviously a test of people’s loyalty but we never spoke up about them, or talked about them at all. And we all answered in lockstep, each and every time. I always hated undergoing them. It really felt like an interrogation.
Questions:
How come James never mentions these polls in his podcasts? Do regular churches do this sort of thing?
What might happen if somebody answered differently during these public polls? How often do you think that happened? Do you think people ever wanted to answer differently but were afraid?
What do current members think of these polls? What SHOULD they think of these polls? Do they ever talk to their family members about the events written in these posts?
At the end of they day, it's up to them to 'want' to see who he really is, the truth is that they like him, because his personality is 'bad' and he brings out their dark side, a side we all have.
My assignment for the day was to go up the woman he'd been flirting with the day before and say "so you're the one who was flirting with my boyfriend". The boyfriend in question being James.. When I refused he got angry and walked off in a different direction like a spoilt boy who hadn't gotten his way. He told me I'd failed my task and the next one would be much harder.
The task I had before this was to bark and pant like a dog for him on skype, otherwise, he said, he would never talk to me again.
James often acted like a child. He hang up on me countless times, when not getting his way, or he would go for the abuse-card and if I still didn't roll over he would pull out the guns and made me the 'bitch'.
Making me the bitch entailed being subjected to verbal abuse for a certain amount of time until I was so sorry I would repent. But repentance was not enough, it had to go on for days before forgiveness was attained. I would beg him to stop but he didn't. Only when I was broken did he stop and I was once more the favorite.
The verbal abuse was mostly how I had always been a bitch, I couldn't change the way I was, I had projectory issues and I was projecting my anger on him which was abuse since he is always so loving and kind to everyone. He told me over and over how no-one understood him and how he was harsh out of love...
This is for Tamar: I am very sorry that I did not listen to you. I really believed that you were paranoid and bi-polar ( as James told us!) and that you were doing this to get revenge, but now I see that what you have written here is ALL true. It took me a while to figure it out, but after you were out of the picture, and he started to devalue you, I started to see his narcissistic pattern of acquiring new victims and devaluing the old, as long as he is getting the attention he needs. There is always narcissistic supply somewhere to be found....
Anyway, thanks to this blog I have been able to read and figure out what was happening. He really has us all fooled, he plays us all separately and no-one knows the truth, we all just want to be the favorite.
I am also sorry for what he did to you, I stood by and let it happen even when you fought him about the truth. I 'knew' deep down that you were right, but the power trip he gives is very seductive and addictive.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #7
One of the things that grieves me a lot is how none of the kids got baptized. Somehow, all of us adults managed to call ourselves Christians (albeit of the esoteric variety after about 2003), yet we never even gave our children the opportunity to make their own commitment to Jesus and to be baptized in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Looking back I can see that this is another grave travesty and legacy of Solid Rock. We all were baptized, most of us as adolescents - yet somehow it was OK with us to not even give our children the opportunity? Do you all remember the time we refered to as the "fuck the kids" time? (And for those of you who came later, no, it wasn’t referring to anything sexual. It referred to a time when we started to ignore the kids and their spiritual needs). Of course we never said this to James, but we said it to each other. Did you know this, James?
This was wrong, very wrong, and very selfish on our parts. We were far too concerned with our own "work." In reality, we were trying to survive, which should have been a clue to the real nature of the group. But it wasn’t.
Thank you for your comment. And I am sincerely happy that you have found some light concerning James. Please don't be sorry on my account, I would have done the same thing, in fact I did do the same thing at first and was blinded by him for a whole year! This has been a huge lesson..
What they don't understand, those captured by James, is that he is feeding them an illusory spirit life, there is absolutely no enlightenment or progress for those in his clutches. All you need to do is look at his life and those of his followers, after all those years of 'Work' and they have nothing to show for it but broken marriages and homes, promiscuous life-styles, perverted relationships etc etc. James, on the other hand has single-handedly worked himself out of his white trash, blue collar background, his life paid for by his members. They truly believe that by serving James, they are investing in their spiritual future. There is NO future for them, a dead-end road of broken promises and desperation. There is NOTHING down there but disillusionment but it will need a miracle for them to see this. James sits on his throne as his co-dependents pamper his needs, lying to themselves about their lives and their 'Work', all the while ignoring those who they should have loved and burying their heads in the sand about the truth of the spiritual damage they have caused to themselves by following this man into oblivion.
James is a monster and everything you tell yourself about his is a lie, you are justifiying his actions so that you can keep living the dream.
Yes. They don't understand, and it's because they don't need to understand. In their world, morality is subjective. The bad things that happen to people are due to their own "level of being." Therefore, the current members have no responsibility whatsoever for what happens or for what James does. It's a very cruel worldview they have, extremely cruel.
Waking up and realizing the horror of what we allowed to happen for 25+ years is really awful - the abuse of children, other family members, and other adults we tolerated and participated in, the affairs we tolerated and participated in, the amount of money we gave to James and how it impacted our own standard of living. On the one hand I don't blame the current members for sleeping through it at this point. It's certainly easier than the alternative.
The Lord said to me, ‘The prophets are prophesying lies in my name. I have not sent them or appointed them or spoken to them. They are prophesying to you false visions, divinations, idolatries and the delusions of their own minds’" (Jer. 14:14).
Jeremiah also warned, "This is what the Lord Almighty says: ‘Do not listen to what the prophets are prophesying to you; they fill you with false hopes. The speak visions from their own minds, not from the mouth of the Lord’" (Jer. 23:16). Further, "The visions of your prophets were false and worthless; they did not expose your sin to ward off your captivity. The oracles they give you were false and misleading" (Lam. 2:14).
Yes, his visions are false, if they are visions at all, they come from a deceitful heart. You may very well have been touched by his visions (as I once was) but it's all a lie, this was in fact the very thing that he used to get people attached, this is his big lie. He said he was an actor and that he could act very well. Do you then think it is beyond him to 'act' the visions? It's all part of his con. First of all God does not give anything so pure to a man with this much filth in his life and heart and secondly, people do not get continuous visions year after year. Maybe a couple in a whole lifetime, the best of saints, but James had at least 30!! That's just crazy! Don't be gullible and see how he has mislead you from the very beginning.
I am starting to question his "vision" of Christ on the cross that he supposedly had in about 1985, which is what started Solid Rock in the first place. We all believed him, that vision in particular. It's no wonder he abandoned it - it was never true.
Now watch: an upcoming podcast will talk about his Christ on the cross vision and how real it is to him even now.
There is no doubt in my mind that James is being used by evil forces, this IS no fairy tale, our world is a shadow of what is happening in the real world between good and evil and the reason James needs to be stopped and why we need to educate people about him, is because of the snowball effect of what he is doing. His evil has in turn caused so much damage we cannot even begin to understand the depths of it. He is utterly evil and has always been that way. No man, so impure, so sexually perverse, so manipulative can ever have been a messenger to God. He was ALWAYS like this, he brags about his evil past for God's sake! He's proud of himself and s conquests, all the fake crying and shame it's all an act of false humility. He's practiced ts game for decades, perfecting it to an art. Judy's daughter has been very unfortunate in all this, but I also believe she will become stronger if she can stay afloat and remain a clear thinker. At least she has had a chance to see things in their true light..
I would, I do, wholly advise against liatenting to any form of podcast or writings of his. This is perhaps the most toxic thing you could do next to calling him up.
Remember when you would've never believed you were in a cult?
You would never believe the effect that still having his media in your life is having on your inner mind. If you fight this, ask yourself why.
Please abstain! Listen to your favorite music and read some books DO NOT allow him entry into your consciousness Evict the fucker!
Yes, I agree with you - listening to the podcasts is generally a bad idea. So it's not that I want to encourage people to listen to the podcasts, but I do want to make it clear that James is reading this blog, and he responds to what we say here via his podcasts.
So if there are newcomers here who are unsure about James, I just wanted them to know that James does read this blog even though he tells his students not to, and he tries to hide by using a proxy server. Certain podcasts make this perfectly clear - something is said here, and he responds on the podcast in an attempt counter us.
Yes, this is well pointed out. James does listen and he will react, although it won't be blatently obvious! You'd have to compare the last comments here to the podcast and then you will see that he does actually listens and counter attacks. Anyone feel brave enough to actually listen and find out how he is doing this? That would be very interesting. Don't you think James?
The Discipleship movement gained a reputation for controlling and abusive behaviour, with a great deal of emphasis placed upon the importance of obedience to one's own shepherd.In many cases, disobeying one's shepherd was tantamount to disobeying God.- Taken from wikipedia
Well, this sure sounds like James and I can see how this may have impaired his vision. However I fail to understand how other people helped James to sin. Please can you elaborate on this? Evil attracts evil if that's what you mean, but James was NEVER 'good', certainly not in the saintly usage of the word. I don't understand how people cannot see that a man with his history and background could ever have been good, he may not have been damned but it's like saying a pedophile was once good or was helped into being evil. It doesn't work like that, James it is true, is a victim of his own abuse (if that's at all true) but after that you are responsible for your own work in the world. Sexual deviancy cannot be combined with sainthood, certain urges are just impossible to combat and contain in ones life and a soul like that will need a much longer time to heal than another soul with less extreme perversions.
What I am saying is that he was not helped into evil, it was there already, latent, waiting to be unleashed. I believe that others in the group helped him unleash it, but the evil is his and by saying he was not alone in sinning it sounds as though we should take pity on him or that we shouldn't be so hard on him. He is not to be taken pity upon, this is another remnant of his work on all of us, 'pity James' is one of his tactics. He has a split personality, he is more evil that you can imagine, perhaps now more than he ever was since there is no going back for him.
Perhaps few, if any of his closest diaciples or current ex disciples understand the length of his actual perversities that he visited upon in his youth, adolescence, young adulthood?
Some bad sruff there, even worse than he is now I think. Then again, even maniacs, socio and psyho paths grow old and less able, even crippled. This would I suppose limit the amounts of people you could harass, molest, manipulate.
Over the hill, I hope he falls down it and breaks something. Let's start with his typing fingers!
Yes as a child he was disliked by adults. The reason for this, he told me, was because he had a knack for the truth ( a bit like Damian in the Omen) and he said, people hate children who can see right through them. In my opinion he was disliked because those around him even then, could see him for what he is. Remember you don't come to this earth innocent, you have already been around for sometime and some people are just born evil. If a man travels from London to Rome, don't expect him to be a different person in Rome than in London ( From the Seven Mansions by Brian Cleeve). For souls it is the same, a killer in another life (spiritual life) is a killer here, your essence does not change at birth. I believe the same is true for James. I believe he is truly evil and knows how to manipulate and play games and just has a natural talent for it.
As a boy James was already perverted, giving sexual favors to older boys and having homosexual relationships. There is no concession here, these are not the acts of a saint in making. And he did not stop there, he continues this sexual depravity until today. If he had, for the sake of argument, realized his mistake and repented, you might give him a chance, but he did not. In fact he said there was nothing wrong with what he did, he did it out of love and homosexual love was the best sex he'd ever had. You believe a man like this was once 'good' and received visions from God?? I think there is too much fear in our world today to speak out of what is right and wrong. We must accept that everything is ok, that homosexuality is good, that sexual deviancy is good etc etc. This is false teaching brought upon us by evil times. You don't have to go around condemning people's sexuality, but teaching that it is good and right is even worse. About homosexuality, in my opinion, people who are gay have a cross to bear, we must love them and help them, but not by condoning their life-style, but by helping them to fight against their urges. Statistical evidence has shown that gay people are still not happy about who they are, they feel bad about sex with the same gender. There is a reason for this. They know deep down that this is wrong and unnatural. Their job is to accept their cross and stay away from temptation (as is the case with all of us in some aspect of life or other). But today what we do, is lower the standards to suit our needs, so that we don't need to feel bad about we do. Being gay and sacrificing your sexuality is a great virtue, one that will be greatly rewarded in spiritual credit, by giving in you are harming yourself severely. It's the same with all temptations, sex, alcohol, drugs, violence, greed, power. It needs to be understood. And we need to ask for divine help to see ourselves through safely. THis is our task.
For the fear of sounding rather arrogant and pretentious, I apologize for preaching. I sincerely believe in the books by Brian Cleeve and living by these standards is very very hard. I am no saint, not even close, and am no straner to making countless mistakes over and over again. I believe that by admitting the mistakes and repenting, we open ourselves up to the truth. By denial and lying to ourselves about who we are and what we have done or do, we make it ever harder to see the truth. Seeing what I had done to my family by almost leaving them for James was the biggest thing I ever had to admit. Seeing that I had let myself fall so deep into his pit of perversion, and admitting this to my husband and family, was perhaps the hardest and most shameful thing I have ever had to do. It felt like walking naked in public for all to see and judge. James got the better of us, he tricked us and showed us how bad we can be. It has been a long hard journey into hell and back and has only made us even more dedicated to this blog.
"...he tricked us and showed us how bad we can be."
This is so true, and it's still ongoing with current "disciples" of his. I speak from direct experience.
For anybody reading this who is considering following James: know that you may end up seeing the absolute worst in yourself, and it will scar you AND THOSE YOU LOVE. Stay away from him. You will not depart from him without scars and regret.
Yes, this is true. It can be seen this way, in our case we were able to set ourselves free and learn from what had happened, but not all are fortunate enough to get this chance. Children who were in his care may have been damaged, they had no real choice and cannot escape, they have been engrained with his filth. For others they do not have the chance to escape, he has them in too deep. So before it sounds like he did us a favor, it's not like that. Only God can turn something evil into something good
If anyone out there can give me ideas on how to help one of his "followers" see what's really going on, I would appreciate your input.
ReplyDeleteCults are set up to seduce people into feeling loved, that's what get's them hooked. They tolerate the abuse because they can't do without the love and approval. Ironic really, talk about swinging on the pendulum!
ReplyDeleteOutward, excessive shows of physical affection and 'we love you's ' are pure unadulterated horse-shit. If your teacher tells you he loves you know you are screwed....The correct term is love-bombing.
That's right, love's opposite is lust. He has completely brainwashend his people into believing his bullshit. It's so absurd its even remotely funny! American cult culture, unbelievable...
ReplyDeleteAnd for anyone looking for his email address, it's james@solidrockvista.com, since he has forgotten to put in a contact form on his site, we feel we should help out and give the world that info. Feel free to write to him, and contribute to his narcissistic supply. He appreciates it.
We liked your last essay James!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.solidrockvista.com/Site/Thoughts/service-september-19-2011.html
Funny how he always seem to be covering his ass when it comes to us and this site. Shouldn't you be practicing 'non-identification', 'Separation'? Which I told you to write that essay James? One of those nasty revengeful I's?
He writes:
...She told me some of the latest statistics concerning customer service. Before the internet, one unhappy customer would spread their negative perspective to one hundred people. Since the internet they estimate the number to be closer to one thousand. The other thing she learned is that satisfied customers tend to tell no one, proving valid what English philosopher, Edmund Burke said, The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing....
Excellent writing James, really good sounding words, you never cease to amaze us with your wit and superior understanding. It's a good thing we can reach 1000 people with our site, we hope much much more of course.
The thing is, James is the biggest backstabber of all time. He talks about everyone to everyone, everything you tell him is subject to public consumption. He told us how horrible his wife was, we only knew him 2 weeks then. He would swear at her. He talked about his right hand man being a 'fag' and how he thought it was disgusting (and then later accused others of being homophobic). He talked about how his followers were never going to get anywhere, how they were doomed to stay where they are and be dependent on him forever. He talked of their abusive behaviour to him, how they didn't appreciate what he did, how they didn't do what they were supposed to do, Steve never came through on his promises, others wouldn't meditate, bla bla bla the list is endless. The point is that he is a gossip, spreading old wives tales amongst his supporters, setting them up against each other, classic divide and conquer policy. And if all else fails, he goes for the trump card. The "i'm a victim and everyone abuses me" card, which seems to work very well! Well done James, you are not as stupid as we thought, BUT you will fall. Evil cannot succeed, you will eventually have to come to terms with the shit you've pulled in this life or the next.
There is always God's mercy. Oh wait! I forgot, God talks to you directly and Jesus appears to you every Easter. Well, then in that case, you should be just fine. Go ahead and screw around on your wife all you want manipulate the innocent and naive, it's ok, you're above God's Law...
Oh did I mention, he told one of his 'victims' he was once accused of being a pedophile. Hmmm. Gives you something to think about. Keep your kids away, just in case....
James has never left the circle of abuse he encountered as a child, in the end everything leads back to this, his manipulation of others and how sees the world abusing him, it's all wrapped up in his own self-percepotion he developed as a child in an abusive situation. It's extremely sad, very very upsetting to realize what caused this whole string of events. But, nevertheless it is so. He too is a victim, but he also knows what he is doing. He does have the power to release himself but he chooses to carry on the same suffering he was inflicted as a boy, the talk of Stockholm syndrome, the self-pity, the accusations of manipulation, the betrayal, all the things he accuses other people of, these are the things he does himself. He knows he does this, but he really can't help himself. He believes his own bullshit but knows he plays people, ,and is very capable of playing certain kinds of people. He had a long training and he fought himself out of a terrible situation and has all the tools to go. We normal people can't understand the kind of manipulation he inflicts because it's beyond our understanding, that someone would actually do this to another human being. It's only when you are out do you actually start seeing what really went on, and some people never will see it, why that is, I really don't know. Maybe they choose not to, maybe they just can't see it because he convinces them otherwise.
ReplyDeleteHe's just an old man who plays people and gets away with it because it's all so small scale.
It's a huge puzzle, one we may never understand. I personally believe I have gained some important experience from all this. I hope others will too.
Interesting remark about the triumph of evil is when good people do nothing. It occurred to me that the same principle applies to James' followers . Even if you are not actively participating in adultery, manipulation, and so on, you still condone or even approve his actions. By doing so you are his accomplices and therefore accountable. Every time he humiliates , invades, psychologically rapes or screws around . In fact, you actually pay him to do so. You pay him with your money and your spiritual currency.
ReplyDeleteAnd he always talks shit about his pupils.
Solid Rock logic: treat you like shit in the name of truth and love. When you turn negative about it, it's then YOUR fault for being negative. You should be happy about hearing "the truth" and "being loved" because now you have a chance to "work". Isn't it great??? Not.
ReplyDeleteSo very twisted and yet enticing at the same time because the ideas certainly tickle your ears. The ideas are the bait. Unfortunately sometimes the ideas are correct, so it becomes difficult to discern what is really truth from what is abuse. If the ideas were wrong 100% of the time, this would be easy to see and walk away from. But there's just enough real truth to make you wonder, and to make you doubt yourself.
Stay away!
As quoted on James' new site:
ReplyDeleteThe driving force behind his enthusiasm is, "Freely you have received, freely give."
That's so nicely put but is toal bullshit in this case. Because James does not give freely. He SAYS he gives freely, but what he does and says are completely different things. He also says " I deserve to be paid for all the work I do". But this is inconsistent with his 'principes'. Are you giving unconditionally or not. And what about those times he passed a hat around to collect money from his followers? WHAT is that all about??
True spiritual leaders (don't take my word for it, look it up) have so much faith in God that they give their knowledge for free and don't ACCEPT payment because the true reward lies in saving humanity as much as they can.
Of course James denies being a spiritual teacher when it suits him and when it's conveniënt to be the spiritual teacher he'll accept the hand outs: All expenses paid and 10% tithes.
He SAYS he doesn't ask for money but on the other hand he COMPLAINS people don't appreciate his work and that he should be paid.
It's so pathetic I don't see why his people fall for it.
"He is the hero, and when it comes time to face an ultimatum from the more conscious spouse, the spouse in the villain to his target and he takes the wife or continues to shit on the husband- whichever is his mark for the time-being.
ReplyDeletewake up. wake up.
it is not James or ________"
Wow, really well said, and so very true.
James is prone to magical thinking. He thinks about himself in terms of ‘being chosen’ or of ‘having a destiny’. …He believes that his life is of such momentous importance, that it is micro-managed by God. …In short, narcissism and religion go well together, because religion allows the narcissist to feel unique.
ReplyDeleteJames is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends;
ReplyDeleteHe will not hesitate to put people’s lives or fortunes at risk. He will preserve his sense of infallibility in the face of his mistakes and misjudgments by distorting the facts, by evoking mitigating or attenuating circumstances, by repressing the memories, or simply lying....
Using complex defence mechanisms, such as projective identification, James forces his victims - spouse, mate, friend, colleague - to "play a role" assigned to him by "God".
ReplyDeleteJames rewards compliance with his script and punishes any deviation from it with severe psychological and verbal abuse.
In other words, the James the narcissist CONDITIONS people around him using intimidation, positive and negative reinforcements and feedback, ambient abuse ("gaslighting"), covert, or controlling abuse, and overt, classical abuse. He turns everything around using shadow projection.
James has created a cult like atmosphere: in this "cult" there is pressure to conform after manipulating your reality. You may find yourself doing things you normally wouldn't. Part of it is due to disinhibiting behaviour (desensitization, something he learned in EST). The rest is due to groupthink (simplistically speaking) and brainwashing and subtle forms of intimidation which include guilt-making and schunnig and public humiliation.
ReplyDeleteAnyone who, having been disoriented once, believes him, as he glibly throws some impressive concepts and 'facts' into the mix, becomes enthralled again to the totality of psychopathic distortion; they are misled and misdirected away from their inherent integrity and their strivings- their human uniqueness, and especially their very real suffering, deleted. He has no conception of humanity and no understanding of himself- he can only tell us what he wants himself to hear. Moreover, he enjoys pulling the wool over our eyes, this 'duping delight'. This is not even a question of hatred towards him. He is a psychopath, a common conman, and he thinks and acts like one. Totally.
ReplyDeleteSo. Question, challenge, be aware, and beware the con.
As Mile once said to James about this blog: They give you too many credits.
No Mile, you do not see who he is because he has distorted your reality and has shown you what he wants you to see.
The "modesty" displayed by James is false. It is mostly and merely verbal. It is couched in flourishing phrases, emphasised to absurdity, repeated unnecessarily – usually to the point of causing gross inconvenience to the listener. The real aim of his behaviour and its subtext are exactly the opposite of common modesty.
ReplyDeleteIt is intended to either aggrandise him or to protect his grandiosity from scrutiny and possible erosion. Such modest outbursts precede inflated, grandiosity-laden statements made by James and pertaining to fields of human knowledge and activity in which he is sorely lacking.
He attempts to dazzle his surroundings with apparent "brilliance" and to put possible critics on the defence.
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse in which false information is presented to the victim with the intent of making them doubt their own memory and perception. It may simply be the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred, or it could be the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorienting the victim.
ReplyDeleteWatch out for this with James. He is a gaslighter.
You guys need to understand something about the people who are there long term: they are bound. That's why they can't leave. They say they WON'T leave, as if they had some choice, but they don't have choice because James it the savior, he's the only one who will help them, who will tell them the truth so they can develop. There is nobody else who will do this for them, NOBODY. So in a sense their very salvation is tied up with him in theier own minds.
ReplyDeleteJames conducts polls periodically to make sure everybody is in line. At SR meetings James publically asks each person individually if they're still committed to him and/or the ideas. The person must give the correct answer for all to hear. Doubt is never expressed. To express doubt might mean that one is thinking about something other than the ideas or him.... and of course that should never be the case! One should never have thoughts other than him/the ideas, because to have other thoughts means one isn't developing.
Now that I've said this, and they've all read it, he'll conduct a poll asking if they've ever had doubt. Some may be honest saying they have. This honesty will not be overtly punished because now that I've shed light on this tactic, he can't punish the doubt, becasue it would prove me right. Or if he does punish it, it's in the form of telling them "the truth."
Remember the facade of freedom must be maintained at all costs. James is way more clever than any of us. No matter what we say or do here, he'll find a way to explain it all away, or dismiss us with the "they're being hateful" bs.
Yes, this makes so much sense and is exactly my experience of James. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. It's a huge eye opener.
ReplyDeleteDo you think James is psychopathic / sociopathic? And why / how have these people been drawn in so badly. I know from my own experience how hard it was to get free and how much I believed HE really was the savior and without him I could not make it. Freeing myself from it was devastating, like being taken off the heroine and going through the full scala of withdrawal symptoms and doubt. I wanted to go back but KNEW there was something wrong.
Why don't they see through his bullshit? It's so obvious when you are out, but I also know how incredibly plausible he makes it sound when you are in.
I hope you are ok and am grateful, very grateful for your feedback.
"Do you think James is psychopathic / sociopathic? And why / how have these people been drawn in so badly."
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comments. I'm glad I could help. For me, trying to diagnose James is a waste of time. I don't know enough about the various possible disgnoses to even hazard a guess. Nor do I want to.
I believe severely codependent people are drawn to James. You can't be at SR if you're not codependent. Generally speaking, I would say that this is a characteristic of all cults.
Here's a good site that talks about codependency in families. It's not hard to see how it applies to SR.
http://www.nmha.org/go/codependency
Somebody posted a link about the chain and the baby elefant and I really liked that. I want to comment on it.
ReplyDeleteAt this point in SRs evolution, the chain has been removed from the baby elephant, in fact it was removed many years ago. So there does appear to be freedom of course, and it's hard to prove that the people are forced to stay, and forced to put up with him. But notice in the story how the elefant doesn't leave after the chain is off. That's what we observe at SR.
Also it seems that much of the literature about cults refers to the stage when the chain is on, at least this is what I have noticed. Of course it's a psychological chain whether it's on or off, but when it's off the illusion of freedom is much larger.
However, there is a term for when the chain is off: Stockholm Syndrome.
He gives the illusion of freedom by telling people they are 'free' to leave. But on the other hand he also tells you you won't develop without him.
ReplyDeleteHe did this very thing with me. He told me if I went back to my old life I would never develop and would stay asleep and only if I were to stay/live with him did I have any chance of development. This prospect is what kept me coming back but in the end I knew I needed to break free. The fear of having found salvation and then thinking you might have to give it up again is enormous. That's what happens to you psychologically and the fact that many people have the inclination to see the good in others and cannot believe anyone could be this evil.
I would say the psychological binding is much stronger now. Maybe in the beginning of SR he knew he had to bind people to him by force because of the financial aspect and now, 20 years on, they have become so emotionally and psychologically attached they cannot and will not leave. They too have started to believe the lie.
He also plays the "I'm pitiful and have been abused game' when it suites him. He has very many faces ("I's") and tactics.
Like you said before, this man is very clever and has been playing this game for decades, he knows exactly how to keep people in line and make them feel guilty for wanting to leave, or worse they have indeed Stockholm syndrome that they don't want to.
It is very possible to have a brilliant mind, but at the same time a wicked and depraved will which is what James has. He is ingeniously veiled and has carefully surrounded himself with people entirely unlike himself, that is, with deeply empathic human beings who wish to please others, who are slow to judge, who are excessively tolerant and who have an eye for the good to be found in others. He has found a way how to exploit them to his own advantage such character traits. It is his association with such people that has helped him in perpetuating the facade and kept him from exposure all these years.
I understand too that my situation is different, it was only a little more over a year (of very close contact) in comparison to the 20 years you have been with him, I cannot begin to understand what you may have witnessed. What I witnessed and experienced was enough for a lifetime of trauma.
ReplyDeleteJAmes is very aware of the limits of human perspectives and that community has the power to enlarge individual points of view. When people talk with one another, they begin to acquire a much larger perspective on things, that is, they begin to see a bigger picture. James cannot afford to have people talking amongst themselves and sharing stories. So he will go to great lengths and carefully contrive very devious and underhanded schemes to keep people divided. He will sow division amongst his people by planting lies or strife about one person to another, and another about someone else. Divide and conquer, leaving him high and dry. THis is a successful strategy because no one expects an intelligent adult who they trust to be carrying on like a scheming eight year old child or an emotionally disturbed adolescent. And since most of us avoid confrontation, it is much easier to believe the liar.
He cannot allow others to see what he sees in himself, for they will reject him. What they see will be as repulsive to them as it is to himself. So he has had to create a highly likable and acceptable image that will procure the affirmation he requires for himself, an affirmation that he can only get from others who do not know him as he really is. Thus began the fundamental lie of James the self-loathing egotist. For an image is a reflection. One can only see a reflection if it is mirrored in some way. James must see his reflection through the eyes of others, and so others become a means to his own affirmation, a means to his own conviction that he really exists. For the deeply (morally) depraved have created a void, a nothingness in the heart of their character. But a person cannot detect the presence of nothingness. Hence, he desperately needs to be convinced of his own existence. He needs to feel that he is. If he will not achieve this through the pursuit of virtue, he will do so through the affirmation, praise, and adulation of others, or through their fear of him or the fear of losing his 'greatness'. But what others affirm (or fear) is not James' true self. He cannot show his true self, for he does not know who or what it is. His true self is fractured, dilapidated, and in pieces. Thus, it is only a reflection that they affirm.
ReplyDeleteNarcissists use everyone around them to keep themselves inflated. James does this. Often he finds flaws in others and criticize them fiercely, for this further distinguishes him from those who are defective. He uses the doctrine of the 4th way to justify his abuse and will say things like "You do want to know the truth don't you?" and he will carry on to swear at them (if you object he says you are identified with the word and it's just a word!).
ReplyDeleteYes we do want to know the truth. This is the catch. We really would appreciate a teacher telling us what we cannot clearly see about ourselves, but in the case of James he does it not for us but for himself. He will stand and abuse his followers and they won't blink an eye. Completely conditioned to accept the abuse because they believe it must be good for them. It's not good for you, it's good for James and makes him feel good about himself, superior, it fills his emptiness.
His spouse receives similar treatment--she exists to admire James and to remain in the background as an adornment. James uses his wife's goodness and she accepts his abuse. Frequently, she is subject to the same barrage of criticism and abuse. This can never be effectively countered, because any assertive defense is a threat to James' wounded "self." and he will accuse her of being negative, being hateful, not wanting to work etc etc the bs is endless. In public however he will pretend he deserves her abuse killing two birds with one stone, making it appear to the outside world that she is the abuser and at the same time appearing incerdibly humble. This is exactly what we were made to believe, that he has been abused by his wife for years and he is the sad little boy that must endure it for his spiritual growth. It's total bullshit.
Not surprisingly, James cannot hear others: spouse, lover, or friends when they have criticism only when they offer adulation will he 'love' them.
He is interested in listening only to the extent that it allows him the opportunity to give advice.
He's an evil man, he knows how to play people. He played everyone I ever saw him talk to. If you confront him you will get the full brunt of his Jekyl and Hyde personality.
All true. Just because his web of deceit and lies is complicated and has layers, the solution doesn't have to be.
ReplyDeleteHe's a giant mistake, the biggest one you'll ever make.
He has himself surrounded by good people. Spiritual potential. Think of this effort, this work, as something coming from deep within yourselves. As a dorment force, waiting to be awoken. This does not belong to another person and it cannot be cultivated, it just is and ultimately comes from God. The fourth way is one of many ways to get closer to it, to get in touch. It focuses on getting rid of redundant material in thought form, rituals, mechanical behavior.
Now, the one thing you are NOT doing is non-identification . You are completely identified with one man who tells you what to think and you all want to be his favorite pupil.
This as far away from spirituality as you will ever get. And your personalities are damaged and slowly erased as you advance along this path.
But of course, your inherent characteristic to see the good in others makes you blind to this, because James cannot be that evil and wicked.
The leverage to keep going aside from this is the huge investments you all have made. And there is the constant fear of dropping out; either do as I say or you're out , doomed to fall back asleep. Is that plausible??? Drop out and wake up, that's more likely is it not?
The investment is lost, but the stocks in solid rock were worthless to begin with. It is a school of lies, keeping its pupils in a mild trance based on the illusion of enlightenment . Have you learned compassion, modesty, virtue, kindness? Or is it fear, anarchy, disappointment, moral decay, perversity, loss of control? Think about this carefully. It will take time and some of you will choose to turn a blind eye.
So the key to the solution lies in that you look at it. Look at him, yourself, the other members of the group. Step outside yourself and observe. Unbiased by the false adoration.
Your spiritual development does not belong to James , he's merely a Collector. The Collector is an empty shell that harnesses a cold void. It collects souls, who get trapped at this plane, somewhat like Purgatory.
"If you really believe that leaving the group equals leaving God (or means you are leaving your only chance to succeed in life), then you will obey the cult leaders even when you disagree with them instead of risking being kicked out of the group. Exclusivism is used as a threat, it controls your behavior through fear."
ReplyDeletefoundhere http://www.howcultswork.com/
This is a very good point. James does this. He implies that without him there is no hope, no God, no chance of development. He's clever enough not to make it sound like you HAVE to stay because that would sound like a cult, but it is insinuated at a very deep level. He will tell you that you will go back to sleep and then add "but that's ok, if you want to be sleep, fine, I'm not stopping you ". And more of that kind of manipulative bullshit. There IS life without James. a better more fulfilling life. You cannot see that now, but if you objectively looked at the facts you would see he has you bound and you are too scared to fight back for your freedom.
ReplyDeleteA parent who loves his child does not keep them attached to the homestead. A parent wants his child to go out and be independent, to learn for himself, to make real mistakes. James is keeping you, like a selfish parent who thinks only of himself, promising you freedom that you will never get, keeping you bound to take care of HIM to pay for him and his needs. He IS abusing you.
God does not work this way, nor do real teachers. They are concerned for your spiritual welfare. They free you for your own good.
In James' last email to me he said he was not a teacher and had never claimed to be one. First of all thats a huge contradiction, because he has said so often he was a teacher and secondly, he acts like he is a teacher with all his teaching trips and thirdly what have SR been paying you for if you haven't been teaching? An advisor or counsellor is also a teacher. You tell people how to run their lives, to take their kids out of school and homeschool them, to meditate, and bring you the things you need. What would you call it?
It's such a disturbing set of events, now that it is blatantly obvious what is going on and all the other perverted things he has told me that went on in the group over the years.
You know, I'd love to put it all out there, for everyone to see, so that everyone knows how evil he is. The only thing stopping me is the fact that I still believe the people in the group have been dragged down by him and that exposing him would be damaging to them too.
Any sane person could see that what he is doing is wrong and evil. Just because HE says we don't understand doesn't mean it's actually true.
yep its a double bind for sure. how can they leave sr if leaving means they are not "working" aka not spiritual, not seeking enligtenment, not doing what God wants, ect? the last one especially is a doozie. people do many evil things in the name of God. people are willing to kill each other in the name of God, which really means i'm right and you're wrong so you deserve to die. i am always suspect when somebody wants to take extreme actions in the name of god. it's so easy to be deceived about what God wants because it appeals to our desire to be right, hey if god is on our side then it doesn't get much better than that because it means we are as right as we can ever hope to be, a dream come true.
ReplyDeletei do not believe god wants us to hurt each other. i also do not believe god tests our loyalty to him the way it is covertly taught at sr. in other words, loyalty to james means loyalty to god, at all cost, including family. loyalty to james means loyaly to god means i'm right means i'm safe and good.
If it was a pure love for God it would be different. But it's not. It's been contaminated with filth. Pure love for God would entail a different path, not one of abuse and dependence, tithing, sexual perversions etc etc etc. Their loyalty is not to God, but to James. In fact it has nothing to do with God, it's an insult to God, to have people be treated the way they are by this man who speaks to the world in His name.
ReplyDeleteThere are such things as false prophets and when times become confusing, like our time now, people become seekers. The more seekers, the more false prophets. They will hinder your development and stop you from being a higher being. James is doing this to you in so many way at so many levels. He really is at the hands of negative forces destroying mankind! He used to laugh at this, but nothing is truer. And such things exist. If you deny the existence of evil (as does James) and sin then there can be no hope, what he practices is anti-doctrine.
These interpretations of doctrine have been fabricated to relieve people of guilt and responsibility. As long as you have 'fun' and a 'good' life then you are ok.
James practices these doctrine. His life is pleasure driven: money, women, gadgets and games and most of all manipulating others for his own enjoyment.
As long as you stay with him you cannot develop properly. Ask yourselves what good his ideas have brought you?
its such a house of mirrors, & once you're in its very hard to find your way out. i know the people have doubts, but they just shove them down. doubt is always painted as not working, not committed to truth, etc... also to leave is to acknowledge that the others who left were right... and this is hard to do since so much has already been invested both in time and money. leaving could mean that all that time & money was wasted... and this would be a hard pill to swallow. at this point its much easier to take the chance that james is right. not only that but just think how strong & spiritual they get to feel... they held on while others didnt.
ReplyDeletenothing we say here will change their minds. they would need outside input they could trust for that to happen... and such a thing doesnt exist. it can't exist. all data must support the conslusions already drawn. any data that doesnt support the conclusion is rejected.
As I was on the verge of leaving everything for James, something stopped me. IT had stopped me before. Something was wrong. All his reasoning wasn't working: He said children were better off in the hands of God and that we were meant to be together, he said 'this is an opportunity', and 'don't drop the ball', and if I didn't do this someone would take my place. He would find another woman since he was entitled to some happiness. He said that my window of opportunity was closing and that I would fall asleep, a deep deep sleep and I would not make it if I didn't leave my family (preferably my kids too) to be with him. He was careful to disguise his words so that if I confronted him directly on what he was implying, he would say that was not what he meant and I was twisting his words.
ReplyDeleteTHis was how most of our communication transpired. Never straightforward, always convoluted and twisted. I thought I did not have the capabilities to understand his genius, he even said this in so many words. But it wasn't that. I really DID try hard to understand, but there is no understanding a liar. He is a liar. He twists and turns and if you pester him with too many questions he turns on you and says you are abusing him. Abusing him? The mere sounding of those words makes me nauseous. How could I have not seen earlier? I did. I knew very early on, but my desire to believe that I had met the most profound man on earth overwhelmed my sense of truth. I was blinded by charisma and lies. Much of what he told me was lies. His stories are full of holes and inconsistencies.
For a year I tried to believe him, but something inside did not agree with how my mind was working out a way to be with him. He had come between me and my husband by turning us on each other. From the very beginning he used the information we gave him to divide us. On the very first occasion he spoke to us on Skype he told my husband to tell me to 'fuck off'. That's where it all started. Something as trivial as this. But the seed for destruction had been planted. My husband never spoke to me this way. James had gotten to both of us.
The grief of what has happened is impossible to fathom. I can't begin to explain how it feels to have your family destroyed. How I almost gave up my kids. THe thought of having been so close is suffocating.
I need to share this experience. It in only surfacing now. THe trauma of what he did to us is still resonating deep throughout our family and friends.
The feelings of love for the abuser are actually part of an emotional defense mechanism, as opposed to real love that exists in a healthy relationship. This emotional bonding is a survival strategy for victims of abuse and intimidation, though they are not fully aware of it happening. Connie knows all this about him, she knows who he is and what he does but she can't let go. We've seen and heard her say to him what we have written here on this blog. But she cannot cope with the truth and so chooses to stay with him, like a child that won't leave it's abusive parent until she gets the approval she is looking for. She'll never get it. She is stuck and it's very sad. He'll continue to abuse her and have his affairs since he can't help himself.
ReplyDeleteDon't feel sorry for Connie. She profits from his parasitic lifestyle. They are both sorry assed, do-gooders that sponge off of others. She has the life she wants and will keep it even if that means accepting his affairs and abuse.
ReplyDeleteIt's a sad state of affairs they have. Forget them and get on with your life. They are not worth the effort.
The term Gaslighting derives from the 1938 stage play Gas Light…The plot concerns a husband who attempts to drive his wife to insanity by manipulating small elements of their environment, and insisting that she is mistaken or misremembering when she points out these changes. The title stems from the husband’s subtle dimming of the house’s gas lights, which she accurately notices and which the husband insists she’s imagining.
ReplyDeleteWhen first James tried to 'seduce' me, he started with an introduction to his womanizing past. I had asked him if he'd been married before. The answer I got was a long long list of affairs I didn't ask for. At the time I wondered why he told me all this stuff, but later I saw that by telling a woman how desireable you are by other women, makes that woman desire you. It's simple psychology but works well.
ReplyDeleteHe started off telling me about his first relationships. All of them so screwed up.
He told me about his homosexual relationship with his art-teacher and his sexual delinquent past where he would give older boys sexual favors on a daily basis.
He told me he was married and ended up in bed with his wife and her sister. His first wife left him for screwing her sister.
Then he carried on to tell me about the 40 odd woman he slept with and how they 'recommended him' to their friends. Why would you tell someone all this info? To make themselves look sexually desirable of course. Making himself out to be the world's greatest casanova when in fact probably none of it is true or all exaggerated. Whether it is true or not is not so much the issue. It's disturbing hoever way you look at it.
He told me how as a pastor in the church women would relieve him sexually before he went out to give a sunday mass/sermon and how at Solid Rock Vista one of his followers came in half dressed offering him sexual favors and another showed him her nipple piercings.
Did you also know he has a really interesting porn collection on his external hard drive? Not your run of the mill boy/girl, but some really nasty stuff.
This is only a fraction of the weird things he did. There is so much more and I can't believe I just fell for it unquestioningly. As if it's normal to have this kind of a past and now be the one preaching God's word. There is no way (unless by supreme divine intervention) a man this tainted could be pure and be getting visions from Jesus as he claims he is.
He is a sexual menace and I for one know from personal experience that he is NOT what he says he is. He can cry and feel sorry for himself, make others feel sorry for him so well, I've seen him do it. The fake crying! I knew there was something wrong there.
I feel so stupid for having believed him. All he wanted was some fun with a naive, stupid woman half his age.
If you admire him for all said above, then good for you. Have a really good spiritual life with all that.
You cannot legally pursue criminals like James Parkinson, because in the eyes of the law there is no crime (other than adultery). Of course there might be tax evasion and stuff like that and just maybe there are some women who haven't pressed charges yet out of shame or guilt, but might do so in the future.
ReplyDeleteBut from a humane perspective, he is trash, a classic example of the rotten apple in the basket you need to get rid of. The evidence is overwhelming. He is a fornicating, power-hungry geriatric pornographer of the worst kind. He will spare no man, woman or child to get his sexual satisfaction. He will destroy any marriage, family or friendship like squashing a bug, without remorse. It is funny that we live in a so-called sophisticated world in which people like this can go on with their business uninteruptedly.
In earlier days, such a man would be sent to the gallows. No doubt, the world would be a better place without James Parkinson in it. The irony of the case is that he himself always says that your being attracts your life and also that who lives by the swoard, will die by the swoard. What will become of you then James??
QUOTES FROM A LIAR
ReplyDeleteYou can catch James lying just about anything he says to impress people.
Here's a couple of quotes from his arsenal of lies and insults. I guarantee you these are the exact words, literal and not taken out of context.
we'll start with the food and drink topic of lies:
I never drink coffee, it is too
acidic for me.
I haven't drunk alcohol for over 30 years.
I don't eat anything with a face.
Then his virtues and X-men capabilities:
I don't do sex anymore, I have passed beyond that.
I can hear and see things that are happening half a mile down the road, it's amazing.
I can look at a tree and see through it, or around it. When you look at a tree, you will just see a tree. It's so hard to explain.
I can turn off being awake at will.
When I meditate, I leave my body for hours, drifting.
(sleeping and snoring...)
And of course the backstabbing:
I would never turn my back on you.
Connie gets a divorce every week. She is like that since she got her hysterectomy.
Steve is so stupid. He still makes the same mistakes he did when I first met him. He still steps in Buddy's shit in my backyard and doesn't get it.
Curtis is a disgusting fag.
I will never go after a woman 30 years younger than me.
To husband: I never wanted to come to your house. I was God's Will that I come here. You think I like being here with you people (at the same time having affair with wife).
To wife: I will give up everything I have here, and leave all behind to come and live with you and take care of you and your children.
....
I'd like to comment on his not having sex anymore.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to add that he is actually impotent and that he has used celibacy the past 10 years to cover for this fact. Also, impotency of this nature arises when people have been over-indulgent in sex during their earlier years (as has James) and that it takes more and more extreme sexual perversions to make them able to perform. This is James to a tee..
I'd like to add that this doesn't mean all impotency is due to oversexedness! But in his case, it is...
Also, the comment about Steve. James also said Steve was an air head who wanted to be better than him, who was always looking to compete with James and wanted what everything he had including his wife. What kind of sick group are these people? Why would a so-called spiritual leader be supporting such weak people? And what's worse is he brags about it, because telling me Steve wants to be him makes him look very good.
The psychology behind all this is really very simple, so simple in fact one wouldn't even consider it a possibility.
I don't know who you all are, but I have something on James which is rather disturbing. There was a time his 'cult' as you call it took their kids out of school and home schooled them. They all lived very closely and intimately. On one occasion James was accused of pedophelic activities. Got too close to the kids. It never came to court because they protected him but reading all this, it fits perfectly in his profile, although sincerely, I hope to God that it didn't happen. Something like that you don't wish on anyone. I would like to see him brought down, as do many people out here who have known him. But he seems to be able to get up everytime and rebuild his mini-empire.
ReplyDeleteYes, I've heard this before. BUt there was no proof right? That figures that they would protect him, he seems to have them so locked into his being, they can't be without him.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wasted life those who live under someone's rule have.
ReplyDeleteThere are many, too many, unfortunate circumstances where "the sum is NOT greater than the whole of it's parts"... and that would be societies created (of any size) and dominated by a vampire-like leader (as low as dirty Ministers to as recognizedly powerful as corrupt Presidents).
The goodness is stunted that one person can be capable of giving to the world, sucked dry and mutilated into a horrible excuse for a community where no one is benefiting but the corrupter, and the individuals are locked into some sort of warped existence.
I cannot fathom any enlightenment that could be so dirty. The childishness of THIS Sexual Manipulation is both dangerous AND so immature.
Please... those who read this. Take a simple Psychology Course and call me in the morning... it cannot fall between the cracks once you ADMIT, finally ADMIT, it's not computing.
When you were born, you were clean- beautiful- and POSSIBLE. Take a self-inventory now. You have to answer to many things greater than yourself.
Happy Thanksgiving here in the USA. And James, go choke on a wishbone. Maybe then the spell will be broken and your "children" can drive your convertible down to a shelter for Thanksgiving Dinner and re-learn to live... to see what humanity is really about.
"If you don't control your mind, someone else will."
Very well said anonymous!
ReplyDeleteWhat's fascinating to me reading all of these blogs is that you are all so victimized, which yes is true but you chose it freely, being a child of SR I did not, I remember fighting becoming absorbed into SR with all my person even though at the time I didn't know why I felt as if I was going insane, why I was acting out, why I felt as If I wanted to scream and kick. It's because my instincts were right on, it was a bad place run by a bad man. I remember you all going along while he had one or another of the members abuse us publicly, no one stopped it, as you all rant and rave and feel sorry for yourselves you should stop and remember you did nothing to protect your own children. Just don't forget it.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure who is writing what, but I'd like to react to comment of the person who says he/she was a child of SR.
ReplyDeleteIf I understand you correctly you are saying you are the son or daughter of one of SR's members? I hope I am write in assuming this.
If what you say is true then we are truly truly sorry for whatever happened to you. Child abuse in whatever form is the most evil kind, becaue kids really are truly helpless. This man should be hung and castrated.
You write about free choice, and it's true you had even less of a choice but adults can be manipulated the same way, we are just children in a bigger body and some of us are completely unaware of these dangers.
Then you say you were abused why we all looked on. This is the most disturbing part of your comment. First of all, we (the writers of this blog) have never been in California, some of us live on the other side of the continent and I live in europe. We have never met you I don't think, we just talked to a couple of SR's members online. We saw enough abuse there to make our hair stand on end. That was just what we saw on skype. Also we met James in person, he came to our house and almost destroyed our family. We were completely taken in, but when the truth started coming out about his sexual exploits we started to realize this man was not who he says.
Secondly and most importantly, it is utterly unacceptable that you were abused. This makes me sick to my stomach that one of the kids involved was not protected. My kids I have been able to protect, by breaking away with what I knew for sure was evil, but it cost a lot and almost led us to destruction. I have seen with my own eyes what he can do and we only knew him a year.
We do not feel victimized, but angry. That a man like this can keep on doing what he is doing to people, twisting their minds and using spiritual rhetoric to do it.
Child of SR, the people involved are/were all looking for something REAL, we thought we found it when we found him. By accident we fell into his hands and he used the info we gave him to fool us. Your parents (I'll give them the benefit of the doubt) will have been in the same position. He weakens your spirit. There are such things as evil spirits. He is being used by them. And you cannot do much about it, but hopefully come out stronger when you have realized and seen what he really is.
So we are not sitting around ranting and raving, we are here to serve as a warning sign to help others realize this man is evil. What would you want us to do? Not say or do anything? If you knew a rapist or pedophile, would you let children play in his front yard?
NO! We, all of us that know, have a responsibility to tell people who this man is and do whatever we can to make sure no-one falls into his hands again.
This man is evil, you must fight evil, not just sit around and say 'this is what happened to me, I'll accept it'. However noble that sounds, it's also cowardice to not stick out your neck and tell people what you know.
I wish you much strength and hope you will contact us.
Well feel free to speak your mind here, in complete anonymity. Thats what these comments are for, not letting others make the same mistakes.
ReplyDeleteThis comment is absolutely spot on:
ReplyDelete"I remember you all going along while he had one or another of the members abuse us publicly, no one stopped it,"
And to be clear, it wasn't only ONE of the kids, it was ALL of them. The oldest got it the worst. The physical abuse subsided as time went on, but definitely the oldest kids got it pretty hard.
To my knowledge there was no sexual abuse, it was physical abuse in the form of harsh and very frequent spankings, a lot of yelling, public humiliation, etc.
I am one of those who sat by. I also participated with my own children and occassionally with others kids. It was wrong and I AM SO VERY SORRY. I really am.
Thank you for your comment, and even though what you describe is pretty horrific, it's good that this is all coming to light.
ReplyDeleteThe ironic thing is that to me he implied that he was against physical abuse towards children. He told me that it discipline should happen with love.
I'm sorry too. This man has gotten all of you to re-enact his child abuse scenario. There is still time to be free of him. And this is the first step.
I wish I could do something more, and though that sounds perhaps patronizing, this is incredibly painful to witness.
We knew there had to be more, but we didn't realize the full extent of it. It really is heart-breaking when kids are involved.
Thank you both again.
It's understandable that children who have been hurt in their youth by this man will be annoyed at this blog. I was thinking about the comment made and I can see that what we are saying must seem trivial to those who experienced constant abuse for many years.
ReplyDeletePlease know that we are not here to complain about him, we are here to actually do something, we think by exposing every single detail of every lie he told might get people to think about him. The best we can do from here is this, and so far there have been enough people coming forward to make us realize this blog is important enough to stay a while, for as long as is necessary, as a voice for those need it.
You see, it's very subtle. People are getting sucked into his web still. Good people who are taken in with him just like we were. And he will bring them down too. And so against all odds, we will try to speak out as much as possible in the hope that more and more will see him in his true light.
Feel free to email us at: stopjames@hotmail.com
ReplyDeleteEveything said here can either help to expose lies or fix lives so be careful where you tread.
ReplyDeleteRobert Burton started an organisation called the Fellowship of freinds in 1970.The Fellowship advertises itself as Gurdjieff-Ouspensky Centers through bookmarks and in the internet. He uses fragments of the knowledge you can find in Ouspensky's books. The group has about 2000 members all around the world, who pay at least 10% of their gross income every month, plus many extra donation.
ReplyDeleteThis link provides a lot of backround information
[wordpress.com]
[animamrecro.wordpress.com]
It is a blog with a few thousand posts of Ex-member and members of this organisation
The egotism that social media allows people, especially weak people, to "express themselves" with on the Internet is mind-blowing. This is where they can paint a neat little picture of their simple brains and lives and little group together. I guess the climax is a little "harhar" about a trivial quote or play on Gurdjieff's more vague sayings...
ReplyDelete"oh, it's so tough becoming enlightened teehee ha ha ha baaa baaaa baaa"
I hope someone can wake up and realize the road filled with I's is where they've been walking all along.
As far as the ride they're bound to continue on, don't forget that day in early school where the popular kid let you sit with them and all you had to do was shit on everyone else and mimic their social rhetoric. Don't forget the fall from that day, and it's inevitable grace to experience-
to not forsake humanity or anyone else for your benefit or rise. Not listening to the lies of a gilded idiot who consumes your attention and would toss you away at a moment's notice.
I guess life IS forever trying to "grow up".
The first step is a choice.
James, through systematic mental manipulation, is able to put an individual in such a stressful situation that he cannot use his mind correctly anymore. This stress or psychosis makes the cult member:
ReplyDeleteMentally unstable
Psychotic
Emotionally unstable
Cognitively unstable
This stress leads to a chemical reaction in the brain that then starts to produce endorphins, or "happy hormones" that calm down the individual. But as soon as the stress diminishes, the member experiences abstinence problems. The member then becomes nervous, scared, anguished, irritable, sleepless and finally depressed and neurotic. In order to ease his pain, the member goes back to the group. This syndrome is called the Sisyphus syndrome (after the Greek god).
This is why James' people keep on going back, they really are addicted to the kick he gives. The push me downs and pick me ups James gives them.
I know from personal experience that he is addictive and I had to be in contact with him all the time, and he let me! He just absorbs all of it narcissistically.
What must it be for kids to know what their parents did? How can you FIX that?
Recruits brought into the Gans group are essentially duped to believe that the group is benevolent and will enrich their lives. For example, by somehow advancing their spirituality or increasing their self-esteem and/or sense of security. As a result of this deception and the systematic use of highly manipulative techniques of influence, recruits come to commit themselves to the group’s proscribed ways of thinking, feeling and acting; in other words, they become members or converts. There is also deception in the recruitment process, which will be described later.
ReplyDeleteFor persons trying to get free from the tentacles of Fourth Way / or distorted forms of Sufi practice that took a culty turn, doing some overview reading of the history of Hermetic texts, and their historical sources may help de-mystify the stuff used to mess with your heads.
ReplyDeleteAs I suggest, Hermetic material may be the equivalent of a 'mother sauce' - it was a messy but fascinating collection of texts and it slipped into the esoteric societies within Chrisitanity, Judaism, and Islam.
The Hermes Trismagistius texts were mistaken as sources of primordial wisdom, but actually were composed in the second century CE in the late Classical world, alongside early Christianity and diaspora Judaism. They had such a wide diffusion among both the intellectual elite and in more popularized forms that they seem weirdly familiar.
This isnt because they are true but because ideas are highly portable.
If you give yourself a chance to see that this stuff has its own niche in the history of ideas, you'll find that the teachers who imprisoned you and instilled fear were just using bits and pieces from a collection of material that very many others have exploited in the past and will continue to exploit in the future.
[forum.rickross.com]
Here is an article describing how Hermetic ideas were incorporated into Sufism.
[www.muslimphilosophy.com]
Much later, Mme Blavatsky, who grew up in a Russian family whose male members were members of Masonic lodges, would have learned about Hermetic material as filtered through the Western European Freemason traditions. Blavatsky in turn wrote her own set of texts, and these texts were propagated far and wide by the methods of mass publication made available in the late 19th century. This material was very popular in Tsarist Russia, and it was exploited in turn by Gurdjieff.
What added disastrously to the impact is that this material already has a haunting familiarity because it underlies so much of our culture without most of us being aware of it -- The Secret and The Da Vinci Code and The Matrix are variations on gnostic/Hermetic themes.
What made this still more damaging was that Gurdjieff appears to have been proficient in trance induction.
This stuff has its place in the history of ideas and isnt magic at all. Learning all this stuff did not cure Gurdjieff of his own chief feature--greed and a need for attention from an entourage--tastes shared by too many of his successors.
You might want to do some research on Michael Aquino as well. He took over Anton LaVey's Satanic church in San Francisco and founded the Temple of Set
ReplyDeletein Marin. Interestingly, several Gurdjieff books are on that organization's reading list. Aquino was also a high ranking officer in the U.S. Navy and at least partly responsible for the abuse of children in mind control experiments at the San Francisco Presidio, which was exposed in the news in the later 1970s.
I know of at least one Gurdjieff/Subud group that is connected to an area Satanic group.
Anton LeVay? Funny that should be mentioned because James told me that he and Connie once performed an excorcism in Levay's son. I found it a rather distrubing adn unblievable account at the time..
ReplyDeleteThis is the child of SR who left a comment earlier. Thank you for all your kind words. I was alittle overwhelmed after finding this blog and another blog about the group. I found out a few things I didn't know that are very disturbing and was very angry. I also didn't know this was mainly people out of the united states. I thought it was Vista sr members. I'm fine now, just saddened by the fact that my family's life and my life wre so affected. I changed as a child, my personality and will were broken and I realize that as an adult I'm always trying to put myself back together. Some good came out of it though. I consider myself to be a kinder more compationate and empathetic person because of my experiences. On the otherhand I have low self esteem, I find having relationships with anyone scary and draining and I won't allow myself to become succesful. I take these things as my responsibilty but I also know were they came from. I work on myself as much as I can. I'm proud of myself for making this far. Thanks again for all the kind words. I truely hope one day the remaining members will take back their lives but if not I will still love them.
ReplyDeleteauto30611819@hushmail.com
ReplyDeleteYou are welcome child of SR (for lack of a better name!)..
ReplyDeleteJames is a master hypnotist and they are all hypnotized. He has told them everything they need to know about him, and I mean the truth about him, the real truth, all the stuff we're saying here they know, and more, yet they stay. They are the baby elephant with the chain removed.
ReplyDeleteJames is a master hypnotist, and this is why it's so important to stay away. A single conversation, a single handshake, is all it takes to set the hook.
James is such a master hypnotist that he's convinced them they're struggling against the hypnotism of life, all the while keeping them hypnotized in a strange devotion to him. The chain is off, but they still cannot leave.
This is so disturbing. So utterly disturbing! This is so evil, so warped, so twisted. In what world do we live that people believe the lies and follow the actions of this corrupt soul? What is happening in America, even europe and the rest of the world that evil like this is allowed to go forward and distract people from their purpose in life.
ReplyDeleteThese followers of James have lives, jobs, kids. Yet every week they go back to this pathetic excuse for a human being to be abused and maltreated some more.
I hope you can shed some light on this anonymous. Where has a feel for the truth gone?
The scary thing about realizing that "they all know" and nothing seems to come from this stunning fact, merely proves how truly accurate it is to label this group a "cult".
ReplyDeleteGood point. Its a fragile situation. The frustrating thing is, it's so obvious to everyone, but somehow he has this bad power over them, to keep them locked into his being and in a big way they like what he does for them, like you said before. They hang around him for the power trip. People with power have an overwhelming attraction, it cannot be fought lightly but must be destroyed completely. They are being sucked into a black hole of negative energy, but somewhere they know this.
ReplyDeleteLike a friend recently said, we are screaming at them from outside the prison gates, but the gates are open and they can walk out anytime they like, but they choose not to. They prefer their imprisonment because the warden is feeding them false and distorted information.
It's like looking through the mirror, the reflection is the same as reality just inverted and backwards. James' truths are exactly like that: they look real almost indistinguishable from the real thing, but they are the exact opposite, going against the grain of truth, and if you only judge by the words you will never see it, you HAVE to use your inner voice to hear what he says in the anti-truth.
The realization of this is very sad. They are in fact consciously choosing evil, or they are too weak to fight it in themselves. It's these kind of people he chooses, vulnerable, seekers after spirituality. They can often go both ways quite easily: up or down.
I'm not sure what you mean by "fragile"... can you elaborate? It doesn't seem very fragile to me but maybe I don't understand what you mean.
ReplyDeleteHere's another really fun thing about sr/esoterictalks.com: how the people sell each other out in order to incur favor, be right, etc. I cannot even begin to enumerate how many times I sold others out, and how many times I got sold out. It's part and parcel of sr/esoterictalks.com. Quite disgusting in hindsight, but it all boils down to loyalty to James. You cannot have anybody you are more loyal to, and still be an active or "committed" member of sr/esoterictalks.com. All the observations about James coming between spouses are absolutely correct.
Fragile wasn't the right word I think, and reading back I think i meant it's all very tricky.
ReplyDeleteBut your comment on selling each other out is insighful. I experienced this with him. He encouraged it and did it himself. He set me up against Curtis and Curtis against me, also Craig and Mile and whoever else needed to be against me. I had a big mouth and I needed to be shut up, so I was publicly humiliated so often I just got immune.
Indeed, all loyalty must be to James only. I was so surprised at this. I would tell him something privately and he proceeded to tell the others what I'd said! Very disturbing. When I objected he said I liked to keep things in the dark and that was not good for the work, things had to be in the open, which meant that anything confidential you told him could be completely taken out of context and revealed. They all fell for it and of course I was shunned... He got everyone to dislike me. And then when I got really pissed off about it he said I was abusing him! really, the logic this man has drove me absolutely crazy, and it makes you wonder about your own sanity. But for him, it's a great way of keeping everyone in line. They all fear being the object of ridicule and so they keep their mouths shut.
Just this should be enough to send people running, but somehow he manages to convince people it's the truth. At the time I also thought it was not right of me to confide info to him secretly, I almost bought his bullshit, I literally convinced myself he was right, because I felt I needed to keep up and do the 'work'.
Thanks again anonymous for the insight..
It doesn't really matter who our anonymous writer is, but it would be cool to find out! I have a hunch based on some info I got from the evilmaster himself just before it was exit time. But we'll see.. Maybe you'll write to us in due time. We hope so.
ReplyDeleteI've just been googling around and saw that he was back on james.xanga.com, where he is complaining about what we are all doing to him! LOL! THat's so funny. Aren't you attracting this life James? AND you always said 'we' don't do anything to anyone, they do it to themselves! It's so funny how he takes it all back when it's all on him! And in one of his complaints he says: Does no-one have personal responsibility? You can imagine how I almost choked to death when I read that....
This man just sits infront of his mac all day writing pure unadulterated bullshit and lies and they all love it! And I must admit, so did I until I saw who I was, and now it's just empty words, but at the time I thought he was some kind of messiah. WHat a FOOL! I can't put into words how stupidly idiotic this has all been. And I should have known better, but he's clever and I just never thought someone like this actually existed...
And reading his comments (couldn't help myself), and other people's to him, it's so obvious how he gains the love of his audience. He sucks up to them, says how wonderful they all have been, how he has always appreciated their eye for beuaty etc etc etc. Of course WHO doesn't want to get compliments like this!? It's the trap we all fall in. He flatters us at first and then draws us in for the kill, or in his world, a long, drawn-out skewing.
Anyway, it became quite evident how he operates. And how I fell into his hands in the first place. Apart from the fact that I was actually looking for something spiritual, It was my own insecure ego, emptiness and need for approal and flattery that got me into this mess. That's what he preys on. And it's a matter of time before he manages to discover what buttons he needs to push (wants he has decided if you are worth the effort of not) to make you run to him or send you away.
Dear anonymous,
ReplyDeleteDid he really pass a hat around for money?
Can you tell us more about the tithing they do?
THanks.
Tithing is 20% of gross. No hats passed. Checks get handed to James or Connie at end of meetings or other gatherings.
ReplyDeleteThe really sad thing, and I do mean tragic, is how these people were believing Christians at one point. Many have been baptized. But Jesus is not welcome there any more, not as savior. He's welcome as long as he can sit beside Buddha, Gurdgieff, etc. But he is not welcome as savior.
This is helpful. Thank you. And yes, it is tragic, because this is exactly what people like James do, distract people from their true beliefs and lead them down a dark alley.
ReplyDeleteThey are too far down to want to get out, or do you think there is a possibility they will see there is still life beyond James?
20 years wasted on this man and his perversions. The fact that Connie takes the checks makes one think she's just as guilty for turning a blind eye. Even if she is getting a hard deal from this man, she's still living a lie, accepting blood money so she can fly around for her painting trips.
On the one hand I feel sorry for these people, a real wish for them to wake up and see what's happened and leave, on the other it infuriates me that they 'know' as you have suggested, but choose to stay anyway and accept the abuse he hands out to them and others, to their kids etc.
I know from my own experience how he brought me down and where backstabbing, gossip and lower morality became common-place. I knoew deep down that at the time my being was 'tempted' and I chose to give in. On the other hand, James sees our weaknesses and uses them for his own gain. He exploits us to get what he wants, money, sex, travel... Even though he says his travel is work, really it's not: He gets taken out to dinner almost every day, cappuccions at the local cafes, beer and whiskey in the bars at night. Free accommodation and sight-seeing. It's not work, all he does is transfer holosync to their computers and tell them how they are behaving badly all the time. It's really so simple and so stupid!
The fact that James got people to leave Jesus, works nicely with who he is. He 'waters' things down so they become meaningless. Saying Jesus is like the other prophets, there is no real salvation, no evil , no guilt. This is of course quite convenient to his non-morality as it gives him the space to act out and do and say whatever he likes.
I've seen and heard things, as I think you have too, that were so utterly and absolutely evil, I don't know why I didn't run immediately. But he ensnares us and it becomes difficult.
I'm sorry about the tithing, it's a disgusting tradition (I wrote a blog about it somewhere on here called: One ring to rule them all), so taken out of context and used by pseudo pastors and other conmen to exploit feelings og shame and guilt in their followers. No money, no enlightenment.
Ok, wishing you well....
I also witnessed extreme changes in personality in James. He would get angry and let his mask fall to reveal a whole new side. He flipped from the 'soft' James we all know to the possessed girl in the excorcist. Within seconds. When I reacted he watered it down, said it was not anger and it was my perception that I saw it as anger. He could REALLY confuse you like this. I would doubt my memory all the time.
ReplyDeleteA Jekyl and Hyde personality, although I doubt that most people get to see this side of him.
It makes me sad to see what you are writing here about James. He told us there were people who disliked him, but we didn't realize the extent of that hate. You have misinterpretted his message and all this is one big complaint room....
ReplyDeleteSorry you see it like that.
ReplyDeleteWe know James tells people we are doing this because we don't like him or because we are negative or because our being attracted our lives or whatever bullshit he tells people to make it seem he is the innocent victim of violent abuse and spiritual persecution.
But the fact is, anonymous, you don't know what you are talking about. Everyone, who has dealt with him in person knows this is the truth, even those who haven't yet dared to admit it, know this is the truth about him.
This man is highly toxic, and we are obliged to spill the beans on EVERY part of his evil personality and will continue to do for as long as we see necessary.
You are truly mislead if you think this man is a good man. Maybe he's been flattering you too on facebook/xanga/twitter/linkedin/youtube/esoterictalks/skype/msn or another internet hangout he might have? The fact that you would write this is proof that you have fallen for him blindly without criticism, that you accept his doctrine and his words as the truth without looking at the man or without even wondering if anything we say is true. WHY IS THAT? WHY DO YOU BELIEVE HIM UNQUESTIONINGLY?
I'm sorry, but it's absolutely clear, there is NO doubt about this man, the only doubt comes from the lies that people tell themselves to justify their James worship.
This man is a multiple-adulterer, a thief, a manipulator, a verbal/physical abuser, a sexual deviant and many other things.
This is not heresay, these are witness accounts and the truth. We have experienced him in the flesh and know it.
If you would like to contend with us, we'd gladly accept your invitation to talk.
But before you get the chance to do that, James will tell you that it's better to ignore us for the sake of not being negative. But the REAL reason is he knows that if all the people that knew him were in a room together, able to discuss him, he would be finished. He likes to keep everyone at a distance, only letting those 'in love' with him devotedly, talk to each other.
He wouldn't let me to talk to others and he discouraged any contact with them and once I started asking questions and being a trouble-maker. THey, of course, reacted obediently to his request.....
You can think what you like, good luck with that, but ask yourself, what goal does this serve us? We don't get anything out of it. We can only warn people who might be looking to see if he is genuine. The others who are with him (like you) are already lost...
yes, I agree with the comment above and wonder who you are to be stating that we have 'misinterpretted' him!
ReplyDeleteThis is just proof to the fact that you are choosing to believe in the illusion James shows you about himself and about the truth and that you cannot accept what we are saying because it would spoil whatever flattery or power trip he's giving you.
Please elaborate on our misinterpretaions. We would like to know how that fits in with is affairs, lying, abuse etc.
Seriously, as said before let's open up this discussion and see where we are going wrong....
".. we didn't realize the extent of that hate. You have misinterpretted his message and all this is one big complaint room...."
ReplyDeleteDo you honestly believe that people would spend any time here at all if they did not have something legitmate to "complain" about, as if they had nothing better to do with their time? Are all of the people here wrong? You're really willing to discount everything said here? You must not have read all of the comments.
You accused every single person here of being a "hater". I hope you stop for a moment and consider this. Your sweeping generalization of every single person here is naive. By judging every single person here it's clear you've fallen into James' trap of getting-to-be-better-than, something discussed on this thread. Please take a few minutes to read all of the comments before posting again.
Here's a tip: if there's somebody in your life who you KNOW is trustworthy from a spiritual standpoint, somebody who's spiritual walk you do not doubt to be true and honest and who also understands cult dynamics (not James of course or anybody who's heard of sr/esoterictalks.com), have that person listen to the podcasts and read this blog. Get their opinion. Then come back and tell us what they said.
Remember this: where there's smoke, there's fire.
James can easily twist what we are doing to make this seem like a 'hate'campaign. He will tell you this:
ReplyDelete1. They didn't get what they wanted and this is their REVENGE
2. They don't agree with what I believe and they have to be RIGHT.
3. They are judgemental and don't understand the Work like YOU do.
And he will finish all that off with a semi-nonchalant comment about his always being abused and how all the prophets before him have always been persecuted.
And they believe him because he will start crying, that fake, exaggerated crying he does, the 'feel sorry for James'tears are a last resort when he's not getting people to comply. He goes to the self-pity card which works very well I must say, I fell for it many times before!
And then when he's done crying, he'll say: I'm such a baby for crying, but I love these people, I truly feel their pain and no matter what they do I will love them because my love is REAL and unending. Love has no beginning. My life is about service to God, about love and I feel grateful for being humbled by them....
And everyone will think: How can this man be so tolerant of what they are saying about him? So compassionate? He MUST be a good man to turn the other cheek to all this!
And so it passes and James will have won a few back. He plays this game every time. I've seen it SO often, pitying the old man with one leg, provoking motherly instincts to care for him. It's just disgusting how this man lies and gets us all to do what he wants.
No words for it.
A word to our friend in California, remember this could be some kind of provocation comment so be on your guard...(yes, I'm a little paranoid!)
REally, is this all you have to say to defend him?
ReplyDeleteThat we are 'haters' ? That's such a James thing to say.
THis is positively sad..
Let me keep this simple for the stubborn persistent ignorant James-church members..
ReplyDeletePicture a burglar. He breaks into your house, which is a metaphor for your life. The crowbar he uses to break down the lock on the door is his lies, his smooth talking to persuade you. He then proceeds but not only takes your money and other assets. He also turns out to be a psychopath and decides to rape your wife just for the fun of it. And in the end he will tell you it was your own fault because you let him in. And by the time you find out he's gone. That is exactly the essence of what he does.
If I had the chance I would put a bullet in his head and send his wife the bill . There is not a single doubt in my mind about this low-life piece of white trailer trash . Is that clear enough for you?
I was once very 'close' to James in the family sense. He is not an innocent victim of abuse as some think. He has always been manipulative, ever since he was a child. His family know what he is, part of the reason nobody talks to him.
ReplyDeleteAre you family? I know he has many brothers and sisters, all of which he says don't speak to him anymore. I wonder why? In his eyes it was all their fault. The only ones he speaks to are Micheal his brother (who he says worships him) and his mother.
ReplyDeleteThis is the man who will screw with your marriage, family, kids, take your money and when you object he will (without the blink of an eye) say it's your fault for being negative.
ReplyDeleteHe did it to us and to many other people. Screwing our wives, our families and our heads.
We were all sucked in by his nice 'words'.
Best thing to do is get out and never have anything to do with this man...
but this guy is so clever, i remember once he made reference to that little voice (the one that tells you when something is wrong), but then he made the mistake of saying that that little voice might not be telling you the truth, and he went on and on, and then finally i realized that he was trying to tell me exactly WHAT my little voice was saying, and i said to myself: "hey, wait a minute, YOU are not in my head, so how the hell do you know what my little voice is saying"...and of course i realized that it was just his clever way of manipulating everyone....
ReplyDeleteman alive, he knows all the tricks, eh?
I'm a child of SRV, I will leave stories behind, take them as you will. As a child I remember james lining the children up and having them "confess" to masterbating in front of the whole group. He made one young adult wear a diaper he was about 13 (do you think this has ruined his chance at having real healthy relationships) I bet. He would call me bitch whenever he got a chance. My cousin came by to visit when I introduced her (she was 13) all he could say was "wow look at those tits". He had all the adults make paddles and write funny witty comments on them then they would be used relentlessly. when I was a teenager he sang "if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, make an ugly girl your wife" I was 14 akward and not very attractive. I have many many more....
ReplyDeleteDear Child of SRV,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this absurd, and incredibly disturbing story of events. We are grateful for you for doing this. It's testimonies like this that make a real difference. On behalf of the writers of this blog much gratitude and sorrow at reading this. He should never be allowed around children, infact this man should not be allowed to live for what he did to you.
I didn't realize it was this bad.
So, we have an abusive pedophile confirmation for sure now. Though, did anyone ever doubt that nagging feeling?
ReplyDeleteThis is beyond disgusting and can no longer be tolerated. If this doesn't jar someone still in his group out of their mind control, then maybe there's nothing left of their soul to save.
It is NEVER okay to humiliate someone, to physically abuse someone, or sexually objectify a child. NEVER.
I'm a child of SRV. Thank you for all the kind words. What's strange is even though I'm an adult now and not apart of the group any longer I still feel guilty and afraid to tell the truth. He has a special talent, he can make you feel like a translucent piece of paper, naked and vulnerable, you know thathe can read your very thoughts, so don't think anything against him or else. I'm afraid he'll find out some how and know it's me and I'll be punished. So odd. He looks for people who are lost, beat down, losers, then he draws them near makes them feel as if they are loved they are apart of something special, they are unique. You finally feel as if you have found a home. He raises you above even his own followers. As soon as he knows you've swolled his bait, then he changes slowly he will start to tease you, tell your little sectrets, expose you to the group, humiliate you, and when he thinks you've had enough then he'll make you his little baby again his favorite. You get so caught up in this game you forget that you are a free person, you do not have to play. I remembered I left.
ReplyDeleteI was eleven when I was brought into the church. I was going through alot in my life at that time as it was, then being thrust into a totally unfamiliar situation (religion),I started acting out. I knew even at that young age that the group was wrong, off somehow. And being a child you have no power so the only thing I knew how to do was cry scream yell, hangout with the wrong kids etc. My family didn't know what to do. They tried spanking,the good ol fashion shoulder pinch, standing in the corner for hours praying etc. When that didn't work they invited James over, he told me I was a bitch and that I would be sent away. I already hated him and knew he was evil but my family loved and adored him, my mother was anamored with him, her eyes would gloss over when he was around. when I found out I would be sent away to live with my drunk of a father I knew my mother was lost to me, I was no longer the most imortant thing in her life, maybe I never had been. It's a horrifying feeling as a child to be thrown to the wolvesas your mother and her Pastor look on. He smiled when he told me I would be leaving, as if he knew he had won.
ReplyDeleteI was sent away for about 2 years. In that time I lost myself. Before I left I was troubled but I was strong and spunky, I had a sense of self, I would spit in anyones face who treated me poorly I still had a sense of self. 2 years with a drunk father beat me down, I was frightened all the time, it was a living nightmare, but no matter how I begged my mother to help me she wouldn't. I gained 75 pounds, fat and depressed I finally went to visit my mother I begged again for her to take me back, she took me to James, he questioned me and told me if I became a bitch again if I caused problems I would be sent back. At that moment I broke, I lost me, I said I would do anything to stay, I became pliant, I became weak and soft, scared and timid. Gone was the spirit of independence and childlike frivolity and rebeliousness that helps young people become strong adults. I remember that exact moment. It felt as if apart of me flew away, as an adult I search everyday to find her. I don't think I ever will. Shame on you James Parkinson.
ReplyDelete"What's strange is even though I'm an adult now and not apart of the group any longer I still feel guilty and afraid to tell the truth. "
ReplyDeleteI felt the same for a long time too, I was only involved with him for a year, but very instensly. I felt guilt about everything, he used it against me. In fact I felt guilt about him and what I was doing with these people, but he switched it around and made it seem it was my fault for being a liar.
"He has a special talent, he can make you feel like a translucent piece of paper, naked and vulnerable, you know thathe can read your very thoughts, so don't think anything against him or else."
Yes! That IS his talent. Even though I believe he has no real talent, he's just a manipulative psychopath who has a born ability to 'read' people for his own gain, to use them and put them down.
" I'm afraid he'll find out some how and know it's me and I'll be punished. So odd. He looks for people who are lost, beat down, losers, then he draws them near makes them feel as if they are loved they are apart of something special, they are unique. You finally feel as if you have found a home. He raises you above even his own followers. As soon as he knows you've swolled his bait, then he changes slowly he will start to tease you, tell your little sectrets, expose you to the group, humiliate you, and when he thinks you've had enough then he'll make you his little baby again his favorite. "
Yes again! This is exactly what he does, being the favorite gives you the power again, the power trip they are all riding on. That's what he relies on. That's why they all want to be with him ALL THE TIME! All his women adore him, I did too until, like you, I rebelled and became the 'bitch'. I also just knew there was something very very wrong.
"You get so caught up in this game you forget that you are a free person, you do not have to play. I remembered I left." This is the whole problem. This is why they are all stuck. Luckily you left though.
Let me ask you though, what about the other kids, do they know what you know? James talked about Rachel June, I met her on skype once, she seemed so nice, so educated. And other kids too. Did they get out or do they still worship him too?
Your stories are so disturbing and as a kid your WORST nightmare is being abandoned by your mother. He has them in his grip, they have sold their sould for his love and approval, because he has given them something they crave, they are missing something in their lives and he fills that space. They are hooked.
I'm sorry about your mother. I really hope you find her and get her back.
I hope you can use this experience to your advantage. Evil like this can be made good if you overcome it and see it.
I'm from the first wave of children to come out of SRV. I wasn't born into it as the second wave was. Something changed when the second wave came. I think the group became smaller, mellowed and changed their diection from fundamentalist christianty and conservatism to a more eastern esoteric philosophy. Abusing children doesn't really vibe with that picture (thank god). None of the first wave or the second wave are apart of the group any longer. The group is very small now. I think James gave up on trying to force the kids to be apart of the group, it was fruitless.
ReplyDeleteAbout my family and mother, I love them with all my heart, I forgave my mother years ago. The members are not the same as they were, age and the new eastern religious direction has mellowed them. I know they will never leave but they are all adults and from what I've seen they aren't hurting anyone so I leave it alone. They have changed but James has not. I think he's become bored with them anyways, he leaves constently to go abroad to get his ego stroked because the group is old hat and to small. He puts on a front a outfit called the fourth way, yoga, meditation, macrobiotics etc. It's his cloak of light to hide his dark needs. He's a vampire. Sadly the group will never see this. The good thing that james has done that I have witnessed is that because he's teaching something which I consider to be healthier (buhddism, yoga self realization etc.) the members truely believe this is his teaching and follow it and they have grown weather or not he's usingit in a evil way or not. So some good has come I just wish they could see him for what he is. And again my family is good he is not.
ReplyDeleteLet us be clear though, he is currently sexually abusing abroad.
ReplyDeleteAnd for those who've been 'converted to the eastern ideas' . They can teach you how to read in prison, but you'll still be in prison for life.
Also let's not assume those that are currently in his cult will "stay forever". They aren't living their own lives and this is neither decent, eastern, new age or mellow- it is hell, it is living JAMES' lIfe WITH HIM. THEY DO NEED OUT.
VAMPIRES, SCOUNDRELS, AND MOLESTERS often never stop till they die. Please realize we must not minimize the effect this fucktard has on others, I know first hand- he can kill your autonomy, this is the most dangerous.
I'm sorry but no mellowing makes this all go away. And his teachings will never be a good thing. He's evil, he infects truth with his being and distorts it, thus everything they get from him is somehow tainted. There is NO way of justifying him, them or their beliefs. They STILL turn a blind eye to the abuse he causes, we are recent proof of that. It's much more serious than you can imagine. I understand you may feel guilt for all the things you said, but you were right on the mark. Don't rob yourself of the truth...
ReplyDeleteI agree that there were two waves of kids, but I disagree that the abuse only occured with the first wave - it definitely continued with the second wave too, but it also subsided as time went on.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I disagree that the members are growing. I know for a fact that this is not so. If they are mellowing, my bet is that it is due to age rather than James' teaching. In other words, they'd get more mellow regardless of where they are.
Also, some kids from the second wave, although not officially part of the group, still do visit the group on holidays. I'm sure James is very entertaining and cordial to them, even flirtatious with the older girls now that they're legally adults. They're accustomed to his antics so it doesn't seem out of the ordinary to them. They've seen it all for all of their lives, even seen him behave that way toward their own mothers. As long as Connie Parkinson has no problem with it, and as long as their own parents say nothing, then I cannot see why they would object.
For all of the bizarr-ness of solid rock vista/esoterictalks.com James Parkinson and Connie Parkinson, I think the single thing that is the most bizzar is how the men stay loyal to James after he has an affair with their wives. I know this to be an ABSOLUTE FACT in two cases.
ReplyDeleteIsn't this the most insane thing? The men stay loyal to him, and their wives get thrown under the bus. A-FRICKIN'-MAZING. If that is not a cult then I don't know what is.
And for those of you srv members reading this: you KNOW I am telling the truth. Shame on you, shame on us all, for putting up with it.
SHAME ON US ALL FOR ALLOWING ALL OF THIS TO HAPPEN. In our pride, in our vanity, in our fear, we stood by while all of these things happened, WE even participated in it. WAKE THE FUCK UP PEOPLE.
Actually, 3 wives, not two. He's only admitted to two but there are more women involved. And that's if you are talking 'screwing' around, there's a whole other bunch of women he fooled around with during his marriage that he doesn't consider affairs because he didn't actually have intercourse with them..
ReplyDeleteI was referring specifically to two MEN who stayed loyal to James after his affairs with their wives - Curtis and Jess. Yes I am aware that there were several affairs, but I am only aware of two of the husbands who threw their wives under the bus and stayed loyal to James. I am pretty sure the other husbands woke up and stayed loyal to their wives after their wives repented.
ReplyDeleteIn the real world this would be considered absolutely outrageous - imagine this happening in any other situation, but because James is so amazing, so powerful, so special, it's just another day at sr/esoterictalks.com.
Consider also that long ago James mastered a technique called "snapping." Here's an excerpt on Amazon from a review of the book called "Snapping":
"Understanding this book gives the reader the ability to comprehend why so many people who get into cults will stay despite obvious absurdities associated with the cult experience. The authors demonstrate that the ecstatic/illumination experience so often treasured by spiritual seekers may only be energy releases associated with the mind dealing with high stress."
James is an expert at creating these sorts of circumstances and experiences. People get high off them, and praise him for being so wonderful. I know, I've experienced it first hand and seen it with the entire group an untold number of times. None of us realized it was just a form of psychological manipulation.
I didn't know about Jess' wife, I only knew about Curtis and two others. So there are 4 at least now we know of. THat's incredible. He lied to my face about this so many times. He said it was all nothing, just a woman who kissed him. How can they accept this? Be willing slaves to him after all he does. He treats both Jess and Curtis badly behind their backs. Calls them all sorts of things. He has REAL contempt for his most loyal followers, no respect for them at all, probably the reason for that is because they follow him around despite all the shitting he does on them.
ReplyDeleteHow do you know he learnt this technique? I experienced this with him too. I was ecstatic when I first met him and couldn't and didn't want to give up that high....
And anonymous, thanks again .Your input is very valuable. You know more than anyone here.
ReplyDeleteCould you possibly write up an account of what you know and email us? Anonymously if you want. We would like to make a blog post of your knowledge...
Whether they have mellowed because of age or the new direction they have mellowed. Again they're not evil just lost and blind. He is evil.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first read this blog I was horrified and disgusted by the affairs, and creepy group sex. I don't know why he's always been a letch. I guess the idea just made my mind recoil. Now I am vwry concerned for my mother. Can those of you who know list which one of the women were his victims. I want to talk with my mother but itsso scaryI know how she worships him.
ReplyDeleteTrue, he is evil, but that does not make them exempt from their responsibility in life.
ReplyDeleteYou can compare it to drug addicts who throw their lives away for their 'hit'. They will do anything to keep it and detox will take considerable effort. This kind of strength is inside them but they need to find it and use it to get out. It's hard, very hard, but it is possible.
I know from my one year with him how hard it is, let alone if you have been on his high for 20 years. It was near impossible to break free and I constantly buried my head in the sand about the truth, because being with him gave me a rush. I KNEW he was evil, without a doubt but something inside me didn't want to listen to that voice begging me to get out of there. Without him I got depressed and couldn't 'do' anything. I was dependent on him and what got me dependent was my own weakness, my own need for approval. Like many others who get involved he preys on our lack of self-worth. I could see how he affected me and how he affected my husband, who was not taken in by him at all. He and my father knew very quickly everything we are saying here, but I was blinded with adoration and did not listen to anyone.
The point of this is, I chose to not see the truth, only when I had absolutely no other choice was I forced to face it and then I knew without a doubt he was evil and I saw the damage I had caused within my own family.
This is the true evil of his being. The chain of events and evil and destruction this mans causes is immense. The ripple effect is huge, it will affect generations.
HE is EVIL because he uses our weakness for his own gain, but I believe we are all responsible for our actions. God only gives us tasks in life we can handle, it's hard but not impossible. We must try to aspire to these tasks whatever the cost of our comfort zones..
Dear Child of SRV,
ReplyDeleteI don't know the women well, our other guest writer knows the ins and outs. What i know is from James and what I saw that year as i communicated with him daily on skype.
His right hand man Curtis got married 10 years ago and shortly afterwards James ended up having an affair with her. James told me she was flaky and that's why he left her. He said that as revenge she slept with Steve Filippo, another follower of SRV. He said Julie was a slut who slept around with everyone, she turned out to be a real piece of work.
I don't believe this is the true sequence of events because I know from my own experience how he lies and twists the truth about EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING. If you ask me she realized on time what a degenerate he was and dumped him.
Curtis broke with him for 2 years or so because of this and then came back, according to James Curtis returned because his inner voice 'knew' that this was the path he had to follow.. [read: total bullshit]. Curtis is a good man, but very very lost in his total obedience and loyalty to James.
Tammie is Steve's wife, according to James she has a thing for him and approached him sexually a number of times. He says he refused her, but personally I think he's just scared of Steve :D
Pat is Rex's wife. She offered herself to him sexually, but he refused, so he says. He told me he is disgusted with her physically and that she is a huge bitch. He insult and picks on her constantly in their group sessions and she sits there and takes the abuse. He called her a 'cunt' so often even I became immune to it. When James said he would leave his wife and life for me, Pat said she would leave Rex to go with him because she can't live without him. She wants to marry him. Pat has a day where she sits and talks to James.
Lorrie. I don't know much about Lorrie, except that she is single and lebanese. She also adores James. I don't know of any sexual advances.
She too has a day with James. Bith Pat and Lorrie bring him groceries on a daily basis. Thy wait on him whenever they can.
Jennifer, is Jess's ex-wife. That she had an affair with James I didn't know until yesterday. James has a lot of contempt for Jess and Jennifer. He told me Jennifer left the group and abandoned her husband because she wanted to find something better than Jess but that it wasn't working and she was very unhappy. But the real reason for all this probably lies in their affair.
He bitches about everyone who leaves him or the group and it's always their fault for being negative!
Then there was Mrs S, whose name I will not mention here. Her husband wrote to us. He didn't tell me about any affairs but when I confronted James on what he did tell me, he admitted al by himself, there had been something between Mrs. S and himself. But that she had initiated it (as he says with all his women). Mr S also told us a woman in the group was made to sign something but when she refused was asked to leave the group. I guess that had something to do with their group sex thing.
ReplyDeleteJames said the group sex thing was a 'power' exchange of which he as the leader. He said NO-ONE could understand what went on there and that it was all out of love, even the orgyish manifestations..
This man is sick and twisted. He uses everyone for his own gain. He sexually relieves himself online and is an exhibitionist. He taunted me sexually until I became immune. He said I was repressed and needed unrepressing. He used sexual language to shock me. He called it desensitization. He almost caused a split-personality in me. One side that went along with him, and another side, my real side that I put in a box and hid away for a while until it broke out and saved me. I know that sounds dramatic but this is how it felt.
It was an indescribable experience. On the one hand he would act out and be sexaully deviant. He showed me pornography and told me to look at it. When I refused he got angry and said I didn't want to learn and that I was wasting his time. It was very upsetting and disturbing to see him in his true colors.
But I MADE myself accept his part of him and only cared to look at that other side, the side I adored. That side I thought was truly spiritual. But it was not spiritual at all, it was a mask, his mask he uses to keep people from running....
James is absolutely bi-sexual. He has weird and perverted fantasies about sex and even told me that his best sexual encounter ever was with a man. He likes women too, but it's a power thing with them. He likes to be dominated. He has fetishes you could not believe, so warped and twisted. He ALMOST managed to convince me this was all normal!
ReplyDeleteHe also told me as a kid he would give other boys bj's in the woods everyday on his way to school. And that he had a huge sexual fantasy about his mother. When I objected to this, he said it was absolutely normal for boys to fantasize about their mothers and that all boys do that. THis was just too sickening for me to comprehend. He got angry again when I refused to believe this. He said I didn't know anything since I was repressed! LOL!
Jennifer left the group, but Jess would not. That's why she and Jess split up. Jess tell his kids that he's has to do whatever God tells him, and that God's best is for him to be at sr. Jess is actually afraid to leave. Jess never valued Jennifer as much as he did James. Jess and James are turning her kids away from her.
ReplyDeleteI know who you speak of when you refer to Mrs. S. She was also publically thrown under the bus many times (as were we all at various times). I am happy her husband stayed with her and did not follow suit.
You see, James turns it all around and blames it on the women. He quotes Gurdjieff, when G said something about the work being difficult for American women. So that's the hook for the sr women. James knows this quote will cause the women there to try harder. And it does.
He also publically castigates the men after their women leave and works very hard to get them to stay. Most of the time it doesn't work but with Jess and Curtis it did. He turns the Bible around by saying something about not following your wife, that Adam followed his wife's lead and look where that got us. Stuff like that.
Julie was Curtis' wife. It's true that she had affairs with both James and Steve. In many ways Curtis and Julie seemed like a great couple and a good match, but from what I recall Curtis was still a closet gay at that time... and it affected their marriage. She left after the second affair. Tammie found out publically (at the same time as the rest of us) one Easter.
Pat is verbally abused by not only James but her own husband and son as well. She wants to be the good wife so she just takes it not understanding that sh'e setting a horrible example for her own son.
Lorrie has no life so her involvement doesn't surprise me. She has a sister who's family was part of sr but they left years ago.
The main reason people stay is that they're scared to leave. It feels like walking the plank! But after you walk away, you realize you never actually fall into the ocean. haha looking back I can laugh at my fear of leaving. But I remember how real it was - it was VERY real.
Cult FAQ
ReplyDelete"Can't we say that everything is mind control? People are persuaded all the time to do things."
"It is certainly true that we are influenced throughout our lives. There is a continuum of influence that starts at one end with benign influences (a friend suggesting that we see a particular movie) and ends at the other extreme with destructive influences such as indoctrinating a person to kill himself or harm others (Jonestown)." p. 44, Combating Cult Mind Control by Steven Hasaan.
In the case of sr/esoterictalks.com, obviously people are not induced to literally kill themselves, but they are subtly persuaded to tolerate James' affairs, divorce their spouses, ignore their parents (especially if the parents are speaking badly about James), tolerate him flirting with their wives, tithe to James, tolerate verbal put-downs, tolerate the complete lack of financial transparency and accountability, tolerating the abuse and put-downs toward others without speaking up, mandatory attendance at meetings... and it's all in the name of following God. It's not that all parents and other family members are cut off, only those who speak up about the group are. Talking negative about James or sr/esoterictalks.com is punished by withdrawing from those people. Those people either learn to shut up, or if they refuse to shut up they live without love and affection from the sr member.
Cult FAQ
ReplyDelete"How are people recruited into sr/esoterictalks.com?"
Keep in mind that there have been ZERO new members to the Vista group in over 20 years. If new people come around, they do not stay for long. The Vista group has been slowly dwindling and is down to Rex, Patty, Steve, Tammy, Jess, Diana, Lorrie, Curtis.
James has attracted a whole new group of followers via the internet. His podcasts are distributed in iTunes so they reach a vast audience there. He has always had an "edgy" approach to spirituality, and this is attractive to people for various reasons. He also has a very soothing voice and is an excellent orator. He is quite skilled at the power of suggestion, and is familiar with a wide variety of spiritual disciplines.
The initial appeal is in relation to people's desire for advanced spirituality. He often quotes from Gurdjieff, when G spoke of people "wanting more." When James uses this quote, this is to assure the person that they are on the right track. Of course it is never mentioned that the very desire for "something more" is in itself a neutral thing; in other words, it could lead the person to something harmful if the person is not careful and discerning.
He quickly turns on the charm and flattery, which either sets the hook, or repels, depending on the inner state of the person. People with low self esteem will be smitten with him; people with higher self esteem will probably be repelled.
Always remember too that the power of suggestion is an insidious thing; his skill there cannot be underestimated. The more one talks to James, the more information he has. The more information he has, the more he can use his powers of suggestion to create an illusion that the person has made certain headway, had certain insights, made the right decisions, etc. As mentioned previously, he is also very good at creating the conditions for "snapping," which is the psychological high created after certain events.
Frankly, the world is a scary place. One of the appeals of James and sr is that they offer a sort of refuge from the world. The shelter provided there is quite real, but it comes at a price.
Who ARE you???? I know exactly what you mean about laughing at how you were so scared to leave. I had the same experience after one year only. Like my life would fall apart without James, or I would fall into this black hole. WHich I did for a while, but the light that came after THAT darkness was so revealing, so healing, the rewards of leaving are immense! I also cannot believe why I was so scared to pull the plug...
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about Pat. He made her out to be a horrible woman, the little general he called her. Once I objected to her being abused and the whole group laughed at me as if I was crazy.
It figures that James would misuse a Gurdjieff quote to put people down. Gurdjieff also said:"No-one can imitate me", but I guess James doesn't use that quote often.
What exactly do you mean by edgy? Also you write that he is an excellent orator and skilled in the power of suggestibility. Yes, this is very true. I wonder though, HOW did he get these skills? Are they a result of his own abuse, that he has been able to acquire them so well? Did he study somewhere?
ReplyDeleteALso, you say he is familiar with many spiritual disciplines. About that I want to add, he is only familiar at a superficial level. His podcasts are all the same, never anything new. And if you ask him about deeper ideas of Gurdjieff he just doesn't know anything about it. He skims the top of every spiritual discipline and parades this knowledge and uses it to reel in anyone he can from a whole range of life.
He might know a lot of stuff, but it's all empty 'fractured' knowledge. I caught him lying many many times, bluffing about things he knew. When I confronted him with his inconsistencies he would always get angry, saying I always had to be right. Where that may be true, he also didn't know shit about the deeper works of Gurdjieff, the Sufi's (who he said were a radical movement of islam!), the essenes, the gnostics, AND many more! He only knows a fraction, but he parades it so well it LOOKS like he knows a lot.
It's also his game, to make us believe he knows things. I have caught him on a lie about something he said he knew about. I argued and said it was not the case. The next day he had obviously done some research online and came back for revanche to make sure he was 'right' again. I didn't believe he could be this childish, but it happened so often. He borrows things you say and trumps you with it!
Those with low-esteem are smitten indeed...
You mention a refuge these people have in SR. It reminded me of something I read in The Seven Mansions, Brian Cleeve's 2nd book:
ReplyDelete"In human warfare there remain oases of peace where even the rumours of war fail to penetrate, and to a soldier stumbling on one of these, the temptation to remain there can be very great. He may tell himself that this is how a man was intended to live, sowing and reaping, and not killing his fellow men. He may be made welcome by the peaceful inhabitants amid decide to remain there, and desert his army and his comrades.
The same thing can happen in the real universe. The spirit may stumble on just such an apparent oasis, and even believe that he has discovered paradise, that this is where he is meant to stay. The spirits he will find there will not disillusion him. That is not their task in existence. Or they may be evil spirits who are delighted to receive him into their company, and to conceal their real nature from him until he is fully in their power."
In essence, James and SR do the very same thing. It might be a refuge, but this is no time to be sitting in refuge, this is a time to be awake and aware and fight evil with any means we have.
Ok, bearing in mind there have been no new followers the past 20 years apart from a few internet catches, he still got to manage the lives of all these families for 20 years. God knows what damage he has done to these people and their children. Just because he's didn't cause a mass suicide, doesn't mean he's not just as evil and dedicated to the destruction of mankind as another reknown cult-leader.
ReplyDeleteAnother question: You mention he does his best to get the men to stay. Is that because they are the ones paying him the money? Not so much money coming from the women? Or is it some father-abuse compensation thing?
ReplyDeleteLet's also not forget all those podcast people around the world paying for his trips and travel. There are quite a few of those and there number is growing. He gets to use his book of tricks safely over great distances, no-one to stop him. He can test things out on them and see who is willing and who is not without the hassle of meeting them in person. This way he has access to many potential victims in a short space of time.
ReplyDeleteThere will always be those who are willing to pay for his free holidays and expenses as he teaches them absolutely NOTHING in return.
I've been with him abroad, I know what he teaches. It's a joke. It's kids play and they all fall for it. It was like the hysteria you see in some 'praise the lord' churches. It just goes to show how desperate people are to find something real in their lives, that they are taken in so easily.
I cannot provide any answers regarding "why" he does what he does, because I don't know. I'm not a shrink. And I don't care about why. The "why" question will make you crazy, because who can really say? And even when you get your answer, what changes? Is the damage undone if we understand "why"? No, it isn't.
ReplyDeleteA huge chunk of the energy of solid rock vista/esoterictalks.com is people in the group diagnosing themselves and each other. In other words, they chase their tails trying to figure out why they do what they do (except when it comes to their involvement with James). I recommend being concerned only with the "what" and the "how." In other words, the results (aka fruit) and how those results are achieved. This is my tact and frankly I think it's far more effective. Remember that ALL of this is narcissistic supply, but especially the "why" posts. "Why does he do this????!!!" plays right into his hand, so I suggest we all refrain from asking why. It's just not useful to our cause. Name calling is part of this; it's an immature attempt at a diagnosis. Stop the name calling; stop asking why. Start thinking very carefully about the what and the how, and I mean in very specific terms with what you have personally experienced. Then come back and write about it. This will be extremely useful to those who are sincerely seeking answers.
Agreed. The name calling should stop. It was used initially to get things rolling, but now it is no longer necessary.
ReplyDeleteThe why questions do drive you crazy.
Thanks for the insight and advice..
Let me try again: I don't want to talk about James (his background, his education, his reasons for doing what he does, etc.) because I don't see how it is useful. And it puts the focus on him, which is what he wants.
ReplyDeleteInstead, I want us to talk about the results of his efforts, the pain we have seen, the pain we perhaps caused others due to James' influence, the pain we allowed into others lives due to our own inaction and fear. I think that if we focus on these things, rather than on James himself, it will be better in the long run. I hope this clarifies my stance. I don't want anybody to feel like I don't care about their questions, but I do think it's important to ask the right questions.
haha we posted at the same time! :)
ReplyDeleteYes we did!
ReplyDeleteBut you are right. Our goal really is to help others with answers they might be looking for.
In the beginning we were just very angry a lot at all that had happened. So we lashed out at anyone because it wasn't clear to us how this worked.
We need to make this a safe space for seekers.
My questions about why James does what he does are indeed fruitless. We can never know the answer.
I guess my mind just 'has' to know everything.....
Cult FAQ
ReplyDelete"Most people will reject something if it is only negative all of the time. So cults can't be 100% bad. Are there any genuinely good things to a cult that draw people in?"
Yes, there are many benefits to being in a cult. The cult provides a level of security and structure. As mentioned previously, there is a genuine shelter from the world that can be had in such a group. It is an instant "family" - you'll always have people to help you move, help you remodel your house, help you build a house, help you with repairs.
If there are multiple families with children, you will all raise you kids together so there is a lot of support there. You'll have free babysitters in exchange for you providing babysitting services. You'll have others there to discipline your children when you're not doing it; likewise you can discipline others' kids.
If both parties in a marrige are committed to the group, their marriage will stay intact at least in an outward way, enabling you to avoid the pain and expense of a divorce. You will appear to be the good Christian family that attends church every Sunday.
You'll have a place to spend holidays. This is especially nice if you have no other family neaby.
If it is a religiously fundamental cult, as a woman you may learn to cook, sew, and keep a home.
Depending on the cult, you may get to feel as though you are on the cutting edge of something very new and exciting. The sense of feeling spiritually special might be very appealing to certain types of people depending on their background or other personal factors.
Depending on the size of your tithe, you may pay less in taxes due writing it off as a charitable contribution. Going into debt will be discouraged, especially credit card debt.
More benefits to being in a cult:
ReplyDeleteYou will learn to be prompt.
You're rent might be subsidized by other members.
You can safely ignore people's objections to your involvement with the group, and this means you'll have less responsibility toward those people. This is especially useful if you are otherwise angry at those people - you won't ever have to deal with that anger, and you can safely avoid those people on the basis of them negative about the group.
If you are in the leadership position you will receive free services such as gardening, home repairs, etc. This might go on for 20 or more years. These services equate to legal tax free income that never needs to be claimed on any tax form.
This is what I find most infuriating. No-one takes any responsibility because James tell them it's best to ignore us since there's no point in dealing with people who are negative.
ReplyDeleteHe did the same to me on a one on one. If I didn't like what he was saying he would just hang up, time and time again! Like a little kid. It astonished me. He said I was being negative because I didn't agree. ANd that I was abusing him.
Also all the other people I talked to don't talk to us anymore either. Like James World is completely sealed off to the outside world.
I tried to get through to another member, but James had gotten to him first and there was no way in hell he would talk to me about this. I couldn't say a word about James, and back then it was just criticism, nothing like what we are writing today.
Anyway, it drove me insane. I doubted my sanity because he got everyone against me purposely. He changed facts and events to suit his reality. He just went ahead and changed things and to back it up he got the others to agree with him.
He plays this game ALL the time. I don't think, in hindsight, that there was ever a moment he wasn't playing a game with me.
... and still MORE benefits to cult membership!
ReplyDeleteYou will always be considered the best student as long as you are the major tither.
All of the details of your thinking will be corrected if you are open and honest about them.
If or when bad things happen to people after they leave, you can safely attribute this to them leaving.
When bad things happen when you’re in the group, attribute this to your own lack of effort or committment. Same goes when bad things happen to other members in the group - blame it on their own lack of effort or committment.
When bad things happen to people who’ve never been in your group, attribute this to them never being in the group.
If you ever have thoughts to leave, focus your attention on those who left, specifically on the ones where bad things happened. This will help you stay in the group. The leader will help you with this.
You’ll always have a place to confess your sins. You can even do it publically and this will help you feel very spiritual because the leader will approve, and the other members will feel jealous.
Don’t ever fear of marrying the wrong person - the cult won’t let this happen. The cult will ensure that you only marry the right person. Even if you later deeply feel that something is seriously wrong with the marriage, just ignore those feelings, for your entire life if necessary. The cult isn’t wrong, you are.
Unlike with a new job, a new dating partner, a business deal, etc. you won’t need to do any research on your cult or its leader. The benefit here is that the cult is affirming your capacity for decision making without outside influence.
Get the respect from your family you deserve. If your family or friends object to the cult, blame them for controlling you. Show humility only to the cult and its leader, not toward your own family. By so doing you will teach your family to shut up about the cult, and they will fear... oops, I mean respect you for this.
One of the most wonderful benefits of cult membership is subjective morality. For example, if you’re a woman you can have an affair with the leader. It can be a physical one or an emotional one, or both. Connie won’t object, and neither will your husband.
Don't worry - they're reading this. haha they definitely are.
ReplyDeleteWow, can you believe it? Even more benefits....
ReplyDeleteWhen you are the newcomer to the group, you will be placed on a pedestal. The leader will give you special attention and a special place of authority in the group - you will feel like his “right hand man” or woman as the case may be. This will give you a sense of power over the old-timers and will help to solidify your loyalty to the leader. It will be a wonderful experience, in part because you will feel sure that you are the first person this has happened to.
If you are one of the lucky women chosen to have an affair with the leader, the other women will feel jealous of you. This will give you a definite sense of power over them - it’s quite exhilarating! Who cares about their feelings anyway?
Never fear the wrath of your husband if you have an affair with the leader - remember, loyalty to the leader comes first, and this applies to husbands as well as wives. Your husband will accept it as a lesson in forgiveness, and he’ll forgive the leader far more quickly than he’ll forgive you. Don’t take it personally - it’s a test of his loyalty to the leader. YOUR test of loyalty is in keeping the affair a secret from your husband for as long as possible. The leader and his wife will fully support you in this endeavor.
The leader’s wife may cry and complain about the affair, and even threaten to divorce him, but don’t let this distract you. She has seen this all before, so it’s nothing new to her. Take it all in good fun because it’s part of the “solid rock vista/esoteric talks” show!
Oh and a happy new year from Europe!
ReplyDeleteAre you saying that Connie is in on the affairs? Or does she just accept she has them? I mean, do they plan this together, like conartists do?
ReplyDeleteJust wondering ..
that's a great question. At this point I would have to say that she's in on it. One affair could be forgiven (in theory. In reality many people can't even handle one affair). But at least four affairs? And people still question or doubt her complicity? "Oh poor Connie" my ass.
ReplyDeleteHere's another thing: as long as other women desire her husband, it means he's special and desirable. It's called "social proof."
Happy new year to you too!!!
Can you elaborate on the 'fake' crying?
ReplyDeleteActually both of them were well-rehearsed in their acting skills. James even told me once he was an actor.
ReplyDeleteI was talking to James on skype and he was so-called upset about me and my husband being together since he 'loved' me so much and I was the only woman in the world for him and this was a one time opportunity and I should take it bla bla bla..
I had always found it strange that he would fall for me, a woman half his age, in europe, married with three kids but at the same time as anonymous has written recently, being the 'chosen one' gives you a certain sense of power. I KNEW however that something about this was fake and wrong.
Anyway, back to the crying: He would pretend to be upset and then would excuse himself, walk away and within range from his computer would start sob very loudly and theatrically. He would return and say: You didn't hear that did you?
Of course I heard it, and of course I was meant to, because he was playing me constantly. I knew it instinctively but chose to believe he was sincere. I could kick myself for being so stupid!
Connie cried hysterically too online for me to hear. James sat there smuggly as his women fought for him and he hung up so he could comfort her. Only to return in minutes to tell me she was now fine ( she was now vacuuming the living-room).
It was like this from the beginning the very day he declared his 'love' to me. THat was so fake and exaggerated too.
Now I realize that it was all a ploy to get some excitement out of his new victim, free trips and ego-stroking!
This is a warning to all future women who might think they really are the CHOSEN one. He has done this countless times before and DOES NOT LOVE YOU.
So even though there are no new followers he is still a threat to unsuspecting potential followers and can cause great damage to their lives. I had the fortune to have an understanding husband who saw what happened and realized I was not myself. My actions caused a lot of pain and sadness to a lot of people including my family and children.
ReplyDeleteTHis is why with your help we need to expose this man in every facet of his bahaviour so that it will be recognized more quickly the next time it happens.
James lied to me countless times, made me doubt my instincts, made me confess things in the hope that my husband would leave me, told me my children were not mine but God's and I should give them up, said my husband was a killer and was cheating on me and would continue to do so if I went back, drew me into his world of sick sexual perversion (over which I could write a whole book!) all because he claimed I was repressed and he could 'help' me.
Within two days of contact with this man, I found myself on a high that lasted weeks. I lost weight, I didn't need anything but contact. Within days I was addicted. Everyone saw the change, but I fought them on this. Looking back I was a completely different person and discovered a side of myself I never knew I had..
Ok, reactions on this are welcome!
WOW!! That is an amazing story. Thank you so much for coming forward and sharing it. I really appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteGoogle is catching on. Look what happens with Google’s “autofill” feature when you type in his name:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.anony.ws/i/IRP1b.png
Try it yourself. Go to Google and slowly type in his name but don’t click the search button. See what happens.
^^^the above link is a screenshot.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.cassiopaea.com/cassiopaea/psychopath3.htm
ReplyDeleteA good link about psychopathy.
"Likeable," "Charming," "Intelligent," "Alert," "Impressive," "Confidence-inspiring," and "A great success with the ladies": These are the sorts of descriptions repeatedly used by Cleckley in his famous case-studies of psychopaths. They are also, of course, "irresponsible," "self-destructive," and the like. These descriptions highlight the great frustrations and puzzles that surround the study of psychopathy.
ReplyDeletePsychopaths seem to have in abundance the very traits most desired by normal persons. The untroubled self-confidence of the psychopath seems almost like an impossible dream and is generally what "normal" people seek to acquire when they attend assertiveness training classes. In many instances, the magnetic attraction of the psychopath for members of the opposite sex seems almost supernatural.
We've always suggested James is a psychopath, but reading this he could be more sociopathic than psychopathic:
ReplyDeleteSociopathy is chiefly characterized by something wrong with the person's conscience. They either don't have one, it's full of holes like Swiss cheese, or they are somehow able to completely neutralize or negate any sense of conscience or future time perspective. Sociopaths only care about fulfilling their own needs and desires - selfishness and egocentricity to the extreme. Everything and everybody else is mentally twisted around in their minds as objects to be used in fulfilling their own needs and desires. They often believe they are doing something good for society, or at least nothing that bad. The term "sociopath" is frequently used by psychologists and sociologists alike in referring to persons whose unsocialized character is due primarily to parental failures (usually fatherlessness) rather than inherent features of temperament. However, this may only describe the "common sociopath", as there are at least four (4) different subtypes -- common, alienated, aggressive, and dyssocial. Commons are characterized mostly by their lack of conscience; the alienated by their inability to love or be loved; aggressives by a consistent sadistic streak; and dyssocials by an ability to abide by gang rules, as long as those rules are the wrong rules. Some common sociopathic traits include:
Egocentricity; Callousness; Impulsivity; Conscience defect; Exaggerated sexuality; Excessive boasting; Risk taking; Inability to resist temptation; Antagonistic, deprecating attitude toward the opposite sex; Lack of interest in bonding with wife
Guggenbuhl-Craig states that " they are very talented at appearing much more humble than the average person, but are hardly so." Some are also able to feign concern about the lower classes and profess that they are on the side of the underdog, the poor, and so forth. A psychopath may claim, for instance (if he's from a low socioeconomic class), that he dislikes rich people intensely, but at the same time, he will inwardly yearn and envy what they have. He is like the narcissist, desiring to reflect a false image of himself through his possessions. Among his possessions are included human beings: girlfriends, wives, and children.
ReplyDeleteSome psychopaths can even be very fond of animals (contrary to the common viewpoint), but still view them as objects in relation to themselves.
In general, most psychopaths will brag endlessly about their exploits and "bad" things they've done (often called a warning sign, which will ward off careful souls), but more often than not, the woman who is fascinated by him will not listen to reason, even if she is warned by others who know him about his past behaviors.
Why? Once again, because the psychopath makes her feel so "special."
James fits EVERY single description of psychopathy/sociopathy. It's just stunning to see how his personality matches every one of these personality disorders...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.cassiopaea.com/cassiopaea/psychopath_2.htm
Here is the logic of esoteric talks (formerly solid rock vista):
ReplyDelete1. "The work" doesn’t feel good.
2. Solid rock doesn’t feel good.
3. Therefore solid rock is "the work."
This leaves the door wide open to verbal abuse - after all, "the work" doesn’t feel good, remember? Just take whatever James dishes out - it proves how hard you’re "working" and what a good student you are.
"Thank you sir. May I have another?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdFLPn30dvQ
That's it alright! Especially the you tube video! This IS exactly what James told me they did in their group sex thing...
ReplyDeleteI've been reading this blog for some time now. I was also involved with James at some point.
ReplyDeleteIt never occured to me he could be psychopathic, there was just something so shady and 'wrong' about him. But reading this, it's so obvious he just hasn't got a soul.
It was amusing to read how you ( the blog writer) wrote that he told you you were the only woman he ever loved, so special, so wonderful etc.
Those were his words to me too.
What idiots us women are! It's a classic.
Also the sexual perversions mentioned I recognize. He had a real taste for the absurd.
I was the 'chosen one' too for a while as long as I was doing what he wanted me to, but as soon as I started objecting he turned nasty and it was over.
He made me out to be some slut who slept around with everyone and who didn't 'get' it.
In a weird way it's comforting somehow to read all this. I suspected he was evil but couldn't put my finger on it.
I suffered from low-esteem and was an approval-seeker. He seemed like a dream-come-true.
Hi D,
ReplyDeleteTHanks for your post. Sorry to hear about your involvement with James.
Yes, women are particularly vulnerable to his approach, but on the other hand, the 'snapping' techniques he uses explain at least some of the attraction. I just posted a quote from something I found online about psychopaths and women and how they seem to find these types irresistable.
Anyway, hope you found some peace.
Thanks for sharing.
James has the potential to pick up women all the time on facebook/xanga or wherever he's hanging out these days. Most of those he writes to are women and he flirts with all of them. They have absolutely NO idea what they are dealing with. THey think he's a sexy spiritual guy with a nice with way words...
ReplyDeleteThe woman I am most worried about is Susan. She's completely hooked, he has been involved in her relationship with her husband. She's completely in adoration and won't hear one word against him. He has her right where he wants her.
We've pleaded with her countless times on facebook, in the very beginning she was willing, but soon James got to her and she shut us all down. James said he had to protect her from us ( he called us terrorists!) and all our hate and negativity. He said she was an innocent creature who would be wounded by the vileness of our attacks. Wow. How projectory...
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #1
ReplyDeleteMr. and Mrs. S were members in the early years of the group. They and their family were subject to a tremendous amount of abuse. They were among the more wealthy of the group, and I estimate they gave thousands and thousands of dollars to the "church." I am not at liberty to say how much, because I don’t know the actual total, but I know that it was a tremendous sum and even my conservative estimate would shock most people.
One event that stands out in my mind right now regarding Mr. and Mrs. S is when James instigated all of the men to deface their property. They painted a large handicapped symbol onto the pavement of Mr. and Mrs. S driveway. This is not a photo their defacement, but it looked like this:
http://www.hooksigns.com/i/PRODUCT%20IMAGES/Handicapped-Symbol-12x12-1.jpg
As I recall, the men got the colors reversed, painting the white where it should have been blue and the blue where it should have been white. I also recall that they somehow managed to blame Mr. S for this mistake.
The symbol was about 4 feet wide by about 6 feet long, and they picked the location very carefully: they placed it exactly where Mr. S parked his car.
I remember all of the men laughing about it. In fact we all laughed, I am ashamed to admit.
Questions:
Why did the men agree to defacing somebody’s property?
If any of the men secretly objected, why do you think they remained silent? Had any of them openly objected, what might have been the result to them personally? Do you think an objection would have stopped the event from happening?
Do you think they considered how this would make Mr. and Mrs. S feel, or their children?
Do you think Mr. and Mrs. S had the symbol removed while they were still in the group, or after they left? If you think it was after they left, why do you think they waited?
Should we care about the expense they incurred to remove the symbol? Do you think James and the men reimbursed them for this expense?
What should current members’ reaction be to the memory of this event? What do you think their reaction actually has been over the years? If any of them read this now, what do you think their reaction will be? Will they shoot the messenger or will they repent?
What I want to know is why has it taken so long for this man to be exposed? Is it because of the podcasts? That he's attracting attention again? Why did no-one come forward back then?
ReplyDeleteIt's not an accusation by the way, I'm just wondering what has changed that people are only now telling their stories.
Maybe it's because of the accessibility of internet?
That's right, no internet then. We left before it got that ugly, never thought it would go that far, but we feared for our family and walked. I thank God that He gave me the courage to leave those who had become my extended family, knowing they would all shun me. At the time, James still claimed to be, or tried to be a Christian, but the pattern was already set for the horrors that followed. The people who started SR were good people, but as time went by some gave James more and more power over their lives, particularly those who came out of the defunct discipleship movement. I remember telling him "they would follow you anywhere and push you right into hell in the process". Not to excuse James for his sordid ways and choices but he did not sin on his own.
DeleteHello anonymous,
DeleteJust wondering, What is the defunct discipleship movement?
I'm sure there are more people within the group who sinned with him, but having seen James at work, he is one hell of a master of manipulation, it is true they choose to accept this way of life with him, but personally I believe he is responsible for dragging potentially good souls into the darkness. That is what evil is and does. An evil spirit can bring down other souls that may have chosen differently if they had not encountered James.
There is no excuse and people must be responsible for their actions, but this blog is not about how much of all this is him, this is about what he has done single handedly, breaking up marriages and families, lying and manipulating, conning and extortion.
These ARE sins he committed on his own, I have been a witness to this.
I agree, he uses his supposed spiritual authority to cover up his manipulative games. Read up on the discipleship movement which I could not explain in a few words. Then you will understand that it was the last thing they should have implemented with the group. In the beginning, we were all attending other churches as well as SR and James had another good Pastor for covering, in fact, several. Had things continued that way there would not have been a cult.
DeleteThe next thing that came was isolation from the Christian community, perfect set up for a cult. Because my husband and children mattered to me more than James did, I left relatively early on, but after Larry and Judy, though we almost followed them then.
James, from his own words, was fighting his need for worship and adoration. He did not do all this single handedly, but with the encouragement of some. Evil got him back, and yes, he dragged many into the pit. He also let women know he had a problem with sexual temptation. We should have all heeded the warning and not given in to his puppy eyes, and certainly walked away at the first sign of verbal abuse or sexual innuendo.
A common error is to think that ‘narcissistic supply’ consists only of admiration, adulation and positive feedback. Actually, being feared, or derided is also supply. The main element is ATTENTION. James needs attention constantly.
ReplyDeleteHe feeds of other people, who hurl back at him an image that he projects to them. This is their sole function in his world: to reflect, to admire, to admire, to applaud, to detest – in a word, to assure him that he exists.
In short: His group must magnify the narcissist, echo and amplify his life, his views, his knowledge, his history…
Psychopathy and jealousy walk hand in hand.
ReplyDeleteJames comes from a very low social economic background with a severely abusive parent. These are the exact circumstances needed to create a psychopath.
He is most envious of those richest or more in power or potentially more powerful than he is.
Like Charles Manson, James wants the women all to want him and claims this is the case, he wants all the men to admire him and also claims this is so. About Mr S ( when I confronted him on this back in june) James said a couple of very nasty things, making it seem like Mr S inflicted this on himself and deserved what he got. In fact everyone who turns on him or sees who he is becomes the object of his anger and wrath.
To the anonymous writer who wrote Connie was in on it: Is it possible she just can't escape the psychological trap? Or do you think they both plot to bring people down?
ReplyDeleteI can see why James could be both/either a narcissist or psychopath or sociopath. But what is fundementally different between all these disorders?
ReplyDeleteI did a google search and did this:
http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2009/06/22/narcissist-or-sociopath-whats-difference
THanks anonymous for the link. I read the article and to be honest James displays characteristics of both personality disorders. I'm no psychologist.
ReplyDeleteThe defining characteristic of the narcissist is grandiosity. The defining characteristic of the sociopath/psychopath is callousness. The narcissist is more likely to be attention seeking, envious and to desire admiration. The sociopath/psychopath is more likely to engage in illegal activity, to be aggressive, impulsive and deceitful.
James has both. Maybe he is both? Any ideas Anonymous?
"Is it possible she just can't escape the psychological trap? Or do you think they both plot to bring people down?"
ReplyDeleteCan't or won't? Although I do believe they are all in a double bind, on some level they are acquiescing, and they know it, including Connie. It's just easier to stay than to leave. Since they don't perceive that any actual harms are being done to others, staying doesn't effect their consciences.
In their world, other people are NOT being harmed by James or their support of him. Remember this, because it's HUGE.
My own experience is that I had to keep on suppressing my real emotions (which he called false..) so that I would not incur his wrath. A couple of times I challenged him to a discussion about some of the crap things he was saying and also to confront him on his lies and inconsistencies, and the anger I met was horrendous. His mask fell and a whole new James would appear. That experience was so startling and disturbing I just didn't want to go there so I started to keep things to myself. I think this is what the other members probably do aswell.
ReplyDeleteTheir fear of leaving is so great, it stunts them.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #2
ReplyDeleteToday I want to highlight a common practice at solid rock, called “scapegoating”:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scapegoating
From the article:
“Scapegoating is the practice of singling out any party for unmerited negative treatment or blame.”
Nearly every person in the group is scapegoated at one time or another, all except James of course. However there is one person who merits special attention, in my opinion, and that person is Judy, Jennifer’s mother.
Judy is an interesting person, because she is the only woman in the group’s history who never succumbed to James’ flattery and sexual innuendo. By resisting James, he never came between her and her husband Larry. She, her husband, and her other daughter left in 1988 but James’ vitriol for her has continued unabated into the present time, with her name and her husband’s name (Larry) coming up in conversation on a regular, if infrequent, basis.
James referred to her as a spider. He never referred to her in positive terms, and his influence lead to Jennifer’s estrangement from her for over 20 years. This impacted not only Judy’s relationship with Jennifer, but with her son-in-law Jess and their children.
Questions:
Why did James villainize Judy for over two decades after her departure? Do you think there is a relationship between James villainizing Judy, Jennifer’s estrangement from Judy, and James affair with Jennifer?
Does Jess have a role here? If so, what?
All of the current members are aware of these events. What do you think they think about them? Current members include Connie Parkinson, Steve Filippo, Tammie Filippo, Jess Thieme, Diana Blanc, Lorrie York, Curtis Taylor, Rex Christensen, and Pat Christensen.
Yes, the worst thing James could do to Judy is "get" her daughter. My heart aches for them both.
DeleteYes, i recognize this pattern of scapegoating. It occurs amongst all those who have done something to 'wrong' James. If james senses a person is onto him or that they are not inclined to see things his way, they will somehow be singled out and ridiculed/scapegoated/ganged up on.
ReplyDeleteAlso he will deny this if accused. He will tell you are imagining it or that you are too sensitive or that you are abusing him, anything to divert attention Fromm what he is doing. It's called gas lighting ( see link in favorites)
ReplyDeleteLife as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #3
ReplyDeleteA common theme at the group is one of blaming the victim for their own suffering and for the harms that befall them. It’s called the Just World Hypothesis. Here is an article that I think is quite relevant to the worldview of the group:
http://www.scu.edu/ethics/publications/iie/v3n2/justworld.html
The entire article is fascinating in light of the group’s dynamics and history. Here is a quote that sums it up well:
“The belief in a just world may take the place of a genuine commitment to justice. For some people, it is simply easier to assume that forces beyond their control mete out justice. When that occurs, the result may be the abdication of personal responsibility, acquiescence in the face of suffering and misfortune, and indifference towards injustice. Taken to the extreme, indifference can result in the institutionalization of injustice.”
I have a two very specific examples highlighting the institutionalization of injustice that I have seen at the group:
1. Nobody in the group visited Michele in the hospital after she had a heart attack. James said we would be enabling her if we visited, so none of us went, not even her own husband. She was in the hospital for over a week.
2. Danny had a terrible motorcycle accident after he and his family left the group. James said it was because Danny left and was no longer under the group’s spiritual protection.
Questions:
How do you think Michele and Danny felt about these events and how James and the group interpreted them?
After reading the article, can you think of other examples when we blamed the victim for their suffering? Is it right to call ourselves Christians with this worldview? What about Luke 13:4?
This world view explains just about everything this group stand for. Their lack of personal responsibility, their scapegoating others, their total lack of sense of justice for the people who have obviously been abused by James.
ReplyDeleteThis is not about upholding the principles of this Just World View, this is about James being and staying the focus of attention..
People are uncomfortable believing that suffering is random, that sometimes bad things happen for no reason at all. Instead, we prefer to believe that people must have done something to deserve what they get. This is obviously a reassuring and comforting belief, which explains its wide appeal. (If bad things only happen to those who deserve it, and I’m a good person, then I can be sure that nothing bad will happen to me.) Belief in the just world can be thought of as a failure to apply the null hypothesis in the moral domain: rejecting the explanation of chance, we prefer to believe that everything that happens is deserved. But the problem is that, however much we’d prefer to believe otherwise, the world is random and sometimes bad things do happen for no reason. And because it encourages us to look down on victims of misfortune as deserving their fate, the just world hypothesis usually leads to worse injustices.
ReplyDeletePeople believing that people 'deserve' what they get is a dangerous road to tread. It's true that suffering is often self-inflicted, for example when one makes a terrible error and suffers because of it. But the need for suffering is necessary for all mankind. It's our way to oneness. Our need to understand things. By making mistakes we learn.
ReplyDeleteFeeling that someone deserves to get cancer or some other mishap is very self-righteous and arrogant. And even people who do seem to get what they deserve must be treated kindly and good-willed, because the next time it could be us and you would hope that someone out there would help you if you were in need.
Helping others, humility and being selfless is important for our spiritual growth. We still have much to learn.
This just world view is very disturbing. People will turn their backs and cause even greater injustices. How can you not care for people who are suffering? How can you stand there and say it's their own fault? This is absolutely tyrannical and nothing about it is at all according to true christianity.
Personally I have no problem with condemning James Parkinson for what he has done and I would rejoice if he was removed from humanity. He is a menace injuring people and hindering their spiritual road. He is a callous being who enjoys inflicting pain and suffering on others. He should not be pitied or consoled, but fought tooth and nail so he is unable to spread his disease. I believe one must fight for things very important and not lay back and wait for things to happen. Complacency is killing.
Some of the members there used to believe this:
ReplyDeleteI believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth.
I believe in Jesus Christ, God's only Son, our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried; he descended into hell. On the third day he rose again; he ascended into heaven, he is seated at the right hand of the Father, and he will come to judge the living and the dead.
I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (Esoteric Talks) - #4
ReplyDeleteThe people of the group believe that nobody is ever harmed, and I mean this in an objective sense. There is no actual harm done to people from outside of themselves, because they choose to be harmed. A common phrase one hears as a member of the group is “You just want to be a victim.”
One phrase that is not discussed is “You just want to be a perpetrator.” Seems logical, doesn’t it? If it’s true that some want to be victims, then it must also be true that others want to be perpetrators. Let’s take, for example, a leader who has repeated sexual affairs with married women, and he himself is married. If the women just want to be victims, then it stands to reason that the married man having these multiple affairs wants to be the perpetrator. But this side of the coin is never discussed.
The truly brilliant result is that it immediately raises their pride: “You just want to be a victim.” “No I don’t!” This person is now set on a trajectory to constantly prove how much they don’t want to be a victim. This includes tolerating massive amounts of verbal and emotional abuse in order to prove that one doesn’t want to be a victim. One is is constantly “working” to prove they’re not a victim, and all of that “work” is founded in pride, in a desire to prove otherwise.
There is no correct answer to the statement, “You just want to be a victim.” If you answer, “No I don’t,” or “Yes I do,” you’ve fallen into the trap. If you answer, “You just want to be a perpatrator,” you’ve fallen into the trap. Think about the world view of the person who says, “You just want to be a victim.” Such a person is saying three things:
1. You are God. You completely control what happens to you and others. You are in complete control of this situation, even as we speak.
2. You are using your God powers to hurt yourself.
3. You can learn to use your God powers better.
“You just want to be a victim.” Can you feel the lure? You just received a challenge. The challenge goes even further than this, because if you walk away from the challenge by not answering, the rebuttal is that you must REALLY LOVE to be a victim, and, you aren’t serious about your spiritual development or “the work.”
Imagine yourself as a person interested in spiritual things, seeking “something more,” yet walking away from this engagement without answering or even looking back. Could you?
Exactly
Delete"For I delivered to you that which I also received: that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures, and that He was buried, and that he rose again on the third day according to the scriptures...
ReplyDeleteNow if Christ is preached that He has been raised from the dead, how do some among you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? But if there is no resurrection of the dead, then Christ is not risen. And if Christ is not risen, then our preaching is empty and your faith is also empty.
Yes, we are found false witnesses of God, because we have testified of God that he raised up Christ, whom He did not raise up- if in fact the dead are not raised... and if Christ is not risen, your faith is futile.
The spiritual is not first, but the natural, and afterward the spirutual."
What is the gnostic reply to this verse? I'll tell you: they do not have one. They claim Jesus, and they claim to be much closer to true Christianity than orthodox Christians.... except there's this tiny detail called "the resurrection" that is spiritualized away in gnostic teaching. Which is fine, really. Except then they can no longer believe in Christ's literal resurrection, since the dead are not raised under gnostic teaching.
DeleteSo to you solid rockers who still want to believe in Jesus' literal resurrection: you need to think very carefully about participating in gnostic groups and reading gnostic texts. Gnosticism is against Christ's literal, bodily resurrection. And isn't His resurrection the very heart of Christianity? Why call yourself a Christian if you no longer believe in the resurrection? It's quite meaningless to do so.
Return to your first love, which is certainly Christ crucified and resurrected!
James told me of I left I would commit suicide.... still here. I left anyways and felt free, light and on my own path whether it was a good one or bad it was my path. I am a single women and he said to stay in the group I'd have to be like Lorrie. Celabite (except with him perhaps) and childless and unmarried. I wanted a life and a relationship. After I left je called me and told me I should come back that it was ok if I fucked people. I realized that he wanted me to be completely devoted to him so all my love goes to him but casual sex on the side would be tolerated. Sick.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds familiar anonymous. Another of his tactics to keep people bound to him. He told me my husband would leave me and I would end up alone. He said if I didn't marry him I would never evolve and would always stay asleep. Still here.. Still married, much more awake than I ever was.... :D
ReplyDeleteYes, he wants his women single or celibate. He would hang up in the middle of a conversation if he found out I was having relations with my husband. He said he was possessive and that I should stop doing that or he would not speak to me. I did stop. For a year!
Like you, he wanted all my devotion, my adoration. Talking about suicide, James talked about it a lot. He said he would commit suicide if he didn't 'get' me. He also said he would close a suicide pact with me. When I told him I didn't believe in suicide as an option (hat it was spiritually speaking one of the worst things you could do) he dismissed me and my beliefs as rigid and primitive.
This man is psychologically twisted and ill.
Thank you for sharing.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #5
ReplyDeleteThroughout the years, James will occassionally withdraw from people. Typically, something happens and the cohesion of the group is threatened. He starts complaining about not being their teacher anymore; talks about moving away; starting a new group elsewhere; saying he’s not appreciated; saying how misunderstood he is; talking about the abuse of teachers and how badly abused he is; saying he is going to “work” with or without them; and generally retreating for a period of time. In recent years this includes taking down his online presence.
He would often conduct one of his public polls during these times, and the reaction from group members is predictable. These “retreats” are a test of members’ loyalty and always served as a catalyst for renewed commitment to him. I hope you can tell that I am using the word “retreat” to indicate a withdrawal, a pulling back.
Whenever it happened, we all gathered around him (quite literally) to console him. We would tell him how much we appreciated him, how wonderful he is, how much we would miss him, how much we want him to be our teacher, etc. If there is an obvious person who is the cause of all this (it’s usually not a current member but it can be), we would disown that person in various ways to show our loyalty to James such as gossiping about the person, and lots of discussion about how unconscious the person is, how unaware the person is of how wonderful he and the group are. We were quite incredulous, “How could the person be so asleep? They just don’t understand. What a shame.” The member, whether ex or current, knows they are being gossiped about. Gossip is a huge component of the group’s dynamic. They don’t call it gossip, of course. It’s just a discussion about the person in order to learn more about “the work.” In other words, they use the person’s supposed “weakness” as an example of what not to do.
Gathering at James’ and Connie’s home for hours and hours at a time during one of these “retreats” was quite common. Current members sitting at home during one of these retreat/withdrawal periods were obviously not serious about “the work” were not considered part of the core of the group. (Jockying to be part of the core of the group is favorite pasttime.) Many times throughout the years, but especially during these times, we would quote John 6:68 in showing what good students we are and how much we need him as a teacher: "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”
After a period of time, he would receive a message from God telling him something “new.” (For example, I remember that after one of these “retreats” of his, God told him about a Fifth Way.) After he hears from God and receives this new message, during one of the meetings there will be a group “snapping” experience (described elsewhere on this blog - there’s also a book by the same name that describes this experience). After they’ve all had the confirmation that he’s still supposed to be their teacher (aka snapping), the cycle begins again. He is now the renewed teacher, and the students feel reaffirmed in their commitment to him.
Life as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #6
ReplyDeleteBelow is a link to an article that discusses why we may make poor choices at times. Sometimes it can be because others around us are making poor choices. At the moment I’m thinking specifically of James’ polls, where he questioned each person about their commitment to him, the group, and/or the ideas. It was pubic and everybody had to answer. He’d start at one side of the room and work his way, one by one, to the other side of the room.
These polls were always done with everybody present, and each person had to answer. There were many, many of these polls done throughout the years, probably at least several times a year. There was never any notice that a poll would be done - they were always done randomly without warning. The shocking thing to me now is that we all answered in lock step every single time, and it was always in the affirmative. Why is this? This article offers an explanation. It’s something called Normative Social Influence:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Normative_Social_Influence
Here is an excerpt from the link:
“Normative social influence is one form of conformity. It is the influence of other people that leads us to conform in order to be liked and accepted by them. This often leads to public compliance—but not necessarily private acceptance—of the group's social norms.”
There was always a lot of talk about how free everybody was to leave, and also about how devoted to truth the group was, but we NEVER talked about the polls. We never openly questioned why James did them, how we felt about them, or what their purpose was. We just participated in them, and when they were over we carried on as if nothing had happened. Looking back now I can see that they were obviously a test of people’s loyalty but we never spoke up about them, or talked about them at all. And we all answered in lockstep, each and every time. I always hated undergoing them. It really felt like an interrogation.
Questions:
How come James never mentions these polls in his podcasts? Do regular churches do this sort of thing?
What might happen if somebody answered differently during these public polls? How often do you think that happened? Do you think people ever wanted to answer differently but were afraid?
What do current members think of these polls? What SHOULD they think of these polls? Do they ever talk to their family members about the events written in these posts?
At the end of they day, it's up to them to 'want' to see who he really is, the truth is that they like him, because his personality is 'bad' and he brings out their dark side, a side we all have.
ReplyDeleteMy assignment for the day was to go up the woman he'd been flirting with the day before and say "so you're the one who was flirting with my boyfriend". The boyfriend in question being James..
ReplyDeleteWhen I refused he got angry and walked off in a different direction like a spoilt boy who hadn't gotten his way. He told me I'd failed my task and the next one would be much harder.
The task I had before this was to bark and pant like a dog for him on skype, otherwise, he said, he would never talk to me again.
James often acted like a child. He hang up on me countless times, when not getting his way, or he would go for the abuse-card and if I still didn't roll over he would pull out the guns and made me the 'bitch'.
ReplyDeleteMaking me the bitch entailed being subjected to verbal abuse for a certain amount of time until I was so sorry I would repent. But repentance was not enough, it had to go on for days before forgiveness was attained. I would beg him to stop but he didn't. Only when I was broken did he stop and I was once more the favorite.
ReplyDeleteThe verbal abuse was mostly how I had always been a bitch, I couldn't change the way I was, I had projectory issues and I was projecting my anger on him which was abuse since he is always so loving and kind to everyone. He told me over and over how no-one understood him and how he was harsh out of love...
This is for Tamar:
ReplyDeleteI am very sorry that I did not listen to you. I really believed that you were paranoid and bi-polar ( as James told us!) and that you were doing this to get revenge, but now I see that what you have written here is ALL true. It took me a while to figure it out, but after you were out of the picture, and he started to devalue you, I started to see his narcissistic pattern of acquiring new victims and devaluing the old, as long as he is getting the attention he needs. There is always narcissistic supply somewhere to be found....
Anyway, thanks to this blog I have been able to read and figure out what was happening. He really has us all fooled, he plays us all separately and no-one knows the truth, we all just want to be the favorite.
I am also sorry for what he did to you, I stood by and let it happen even when you fought him about the truth. I 'knew' deep down that you were right, but the power trip he gives is very seductive and addictive.
Thanks for opening my eyes.
Whoever you are, thank you. You have brought tears of joy to my eyes. God bless you!
DeleteLife as a Member of Solid Rock Vista (now Esoteric Talks) - #7
ReplyDeleteOne of the things that grieves me a lot is how none of the kids got baptized. Somehow, all of us adults managed to call ourselves Christians (albeit of the esoteric variety after about 2003), yet we never even gave our children the opportunity to make their own commitment to Jesus and to be baptized in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Looking back I can see that this is another grave travesty and legacy of Solid Rock. We all were baptized, most of us as adolescents - yet somehow it was OK with us to not even give our children the opportunity? Do you all remember the time we refered to as the "fuck the kids" time? (And for those of you who came later, no, it wasn’t referring to anything sexual. It referred to a time when we started to ignore the kids and their spiritual needs). Of course we never said this to James, but we said it to each other. Did you know this, James?
This was wrong, very wrong, and very selfish on our parts. We were far too concerned with our own "work." In reality, we were trying to survive, which should have been a clue to the real nature of the group. But it wasn’t.
Dear anonymous,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment. And I am sincerely happy that you have found some light concerning James.
Please don't be sorry on my account, I would have done the same thing, in fact I did do the same thing at first and was blinded by him for a whole year!
This has been a huge lesson..
Take care.
What they don't understand, those captured by James, is that he is feeding them an illusory spirit life, there is absolutely no enlightenment or progress for those in his clutches. All you need to do is look at his life and those of his followers, after all those years of 'Work' and they have nothing to show for it but broken marriages and homes, promiscuous life-styles, perverted relationships etc etc. James, on the other hand has single-handedly worked himself out of his white trash, blue collar background, his life paid for by his members. They truly believe that by serving James, they are investing in their spiritual future. There is NO future for them, a dead-end road of broken promises and desperation. There is NOTHING down there but disillusionment but it will need a miracle for them to see this.
ReplyDeleteJames sits on his throne as his co-dependents pamper his needs, lying to themselves about their lives and their 'Work', all the while ignoring those who they should have loved and burying their heads in the sand about the truth of the spiritual damage they have caused to themselves by following this man into oblivion.
James is a monster and everything you tell yourself about his is a lie, you are justifiying his actions so that you can keep living the dream.
Yes. They don't understand, and it's because they don't need to understand. In their world, morality is subjective. The bad things that happen to people are due to their own "level of being." Therefore, the current members have no responsibility whatsoever for what happens or for what James does. It's a very cruel worldview they have, extremely cruel.
DeleteWaking up and realizing the horror of what we allowed to happen for 25+ years is really awful - the abuse of children, other family members, and other adults we tolerated and participated in, the affairs we tolerated and participated in, the amount of money we gave to James and how it impacted our own standard of living. On the one hand I don't blame the current members for sleeping through it at this point. It's certainly easier than the alternative.
James is a dead dickwad. Did you know this? Jimmy E. Parkinson may your grin turn to blood.
ReplyDeleteThe Lord said to me, ‘The prophets are prophesying lies in my name. I have not sent them or appointed them or spoken to them. They are prophesying to you false visions, divinations, idolatries and the delusions of their own minds’" (Jer. 14:14).
ReplyDeleteJeremiah also warned, "This is what the Lord Almighty says: ‘Do not listen to what the prophets are prophesying to you; they fill you with false hopes. The speak visions from their own minds, not from the mouth of the Lord’" (Jer. 23:16). Further, "The visions of your prophets were false and worthless; they did not expose your sin to ward off your captivity. The oracles they give you were false and misleading" (Lam. 2:14).
Yes, his visions are false, if they are visions at all, they come from a deceitful heart. You may very well have been touched by his visions (as I once was) but it's all a lie, this was in fact the very thing that he used to get people attached, this is his big lie. He said he was an actor and that he could act very well. Do you then think it is beyond him to 'act' the visions? It's all part of his con. First of all God does not give anything so pure to a man with this much filth in his life and heart and secondly, people do not get continuous visions year after year. Maybe a couple in a whole lifetime, the best of saints, but James had at least 30!! That's just crazy! Don't be gullible and see how he has mislead you from the very beginning.
ReplyDeleteI am starting to question his "vision" of Christ on the cross that he supposedly had in about 1985, which is what started Solid Rock in the first place. We all believed him, that vision in particular. It's no wonder he abandoned it - it was never true.
DeleteNow watch: an upcoming podcast will talk about his Christ on the cross vision and how real it is to him even now.
There is no doubt in my mind that James is being used by evil forces, this IS no fairy tale, our world is a shadow of what is happening in the real world between good and evil and the reason James needs to be stopped and why we need to educate people about him, is because of the snowball effect of what he is doing. His evil has in turn caused so much damage we cannot even begin to understand the depths of it. He is utterly evil and has always been that way. No man, so impure, so sexually perverse, so manipulative can ever have been a messenger to God. He was ALWAYS like this, he brags about his evil past for God's sake! He's proud of himself and s conquests, all the fake crying and shame it's all an act of false humility. He's practiced ts game for decades, perfecting it to an art.
ReplyDeleteJudy's daughter has been very unfortunate in all this, but I also believe she will become stronger if she can stay afloat and remain a clear thinker. At least she has had a chance to see things in their true light..
I would, I do, wholly advise against liatenting to any form of podcast or writings of his. This is perhaps the most toxic thing you could do next to calling him up.
ReplyDeleteRemember when you would've never believed you were in a cult?
You would never believe the effect that still having his media in your life is having on your inner mind. If you fight this, ask yourself why.
Please abstain! Listen to your favorite music and read some books DO NOT allow him entry into your consciousness
Evict the fucker!
Yes, I agree with you - listening to the podcasts is generally a bad idea. So it's not that I want to encourage people to listen to the podcasts, but I do want to make it clear that James is reading this blog, and he responds to what we say here via his podcasts.
DeleteSo if there are newcomers here who are unsure about James, I just wanted them to know that James does read this blog even though he tells his students not to, and he tries to hide by using a proxy server. Certain podcasts make this perfectly clear - something is said here, and he responds on the podcast in an attempt counter us.
That's all I wanted to point out.
Yes, this is well pointed out. James does listen and he will react, although it won't be blatently obvious! You'd have to compare the last comments here to the podcast and then you will see that he does actually listens and counter attacks. Anyone feel brave enough to actually listen and find out how he is doing this? That would be very interesting. Don't you think James?
DeleteThe Discipleship movement gained a reputation for controlling and abusive behaviour, with a great deal of emphasis placed upon the importance of obedience to one's own shepherd.In many cases, disobeying one's shepherd was tantamount to disobeying God.- Taken from wikipedia
ReplyDeleteWell, this sure sounds like James and I can see how this may have impaired his vision. However I fail to understand how other people helped James to sin. Please can you elaborate on this? Evil attracts evil if that's what you mean, but James was NEVER 'good', certainly not in the saintly usage of the word. I don't understand how people cannot see that a man with his history and background could ever have been good, he may not have been damned but it's like saying a pedophile was once good or was helped into being evil. It doesn't work like that, James it is true, is a victim of his own abuse (if that's at all true) but after that you are responsible for your own work in the world. Sexual deviancy cannot be combined with sainthood, certain urges are just impossible to combat and contain in ones life and a soul like that will need a much longer time to heal than another soul with less extreme perversions.
What I am saying is that he was not helped into evil, it was there already, latent, waiting to be unleashed. I believe that others in the group helped him unleash it, but the evil is his and by saying he was not alone in sinning it sounds as though we should take pity on him or that we shouldn't be so hard on him. He is not to be taken pity upon, this is another remnant of his work on all of us, 'pity James' is one of his tactics. He has a split personality, he is more evil that you can imagine, perhaps now more than he ever was since there is no going back for him.
Perhaps few, if any of his closest diaciples or current ex disciples understand the length of his actual perversities that he visited upon in his youth, adolescence, young adulthood?
ReplyDeleteSome bad sruff there, even worse than he is now I think. Then again, even maniacs, socio and psyho paths grow old and less able, even crippled. This would I suppose limit the amounts of people you could harass, molest, manipulate.
Over the hill, I hope he falls down it and breaks something. Let's start with his typing fingers!
Yes as a child he was disliked by adults. The reason for this, he told me, was because he had a knack for the truth ( a bit like Damian in the Omen) and he said, people hate children who can see right through them. In my opinion he was disliked because those around him even then, could see him for what he is. Remember you don't come to this earth innocent, you have already been around for sometime and some people are just born evil. If a man travels from London to Rome, don't expect him to be a different person in Rome than in London ( From the Seven Mansions by Brian Cleeve). For souls it is the same, a killer in another life (spiritual life) is a killer here, your essence does not change at birth. I believe the same is true for James.
ReplyDeleteI believe he is truly evil and knows how to manipulate and play games and just has a natural talent for it.
As a boy James was already perverted, giving sexual favors to older boys and having homosexual relationships. There is no concession here, these are not the acts of a saint in making. And he did not stop there, he continues this sexual depravity until today. If he had, for the sake of argument, realized his mistake and repented, you might give him a chance, but he did not. In fact he said there was nothing wrong with what he did, he did it out of love and homosexual love was the best sex he'd ever had. You believe a man like this was once 'good' and received visions from God??
I think there is too much fear in our world today to speak out of what is right and wrong. We must accept that everything is ok, that homosexuality is good, that sexual deviancy is good etc etc. This is false teaching brought upon us by evil times. You don't have to go around condemning people's sexuality, but teaching that it is good and right is even worse.
About homosexuality, in my opinion, people who are gay have a cross to bear, we must love them and help them, but not by condoning their life-style, but by helping them to fight against their urges. Statistical evidence has shown that gay people are still not happy about who they are, they feel bad about sex with the same gender. There is a reason for this. They know deep down that this is wrong and unnatural. Their job is to accept their cross and stay away from temptation (as is the case with all of us in some aspect of life or other).
But today what we do, is lower the standards to suit our needs, so that we don't need to feel bad about we do.
Being gay and sacrificing your sexuality is a great virtue, one that will be greatly rewarded in spiritual credit, by giving in you are harming yourself severely. It's the same with all temptations, sex, alcohol, drugs, violence, greed, power. It needs to be understood. And we need to ask for divine help to see ourselves through safely. THis is our task.
For the fear of sounding rather arrogant and pretentious, I apologize for preaching. I sincerely believe in the books by Brian Cleeve and living by these standards is very very hard. I am no saint, not even close, and am no straner to making countless mistakes over and over again. I believe that by admitting the mistakes and repenting, we open ourselves up to the truth. By denial and lying to ourselves about who we are and what we have done or do, we make it ever harder to see the truth.
Seeing what I had done to my family by almost leaving them for James was the biggest thing I ever had to admit. Seeing that I had let myself fall so deep into his pit of perversion, and admitting this to my husband and family, was perhaps the hardest and most shameful thing I have ever had to do. It felt like walking naked in public for all to see and judge.
James got the better of us, he tricked us and showed us how bad we can be. It has been a long hard journey into hell and back and has only made us even more dedicated to this blog.
"...he tricked us and showed us how bad we can be."
DeleteThis is so true, and it's still ongoing with current "disciples" of his. I speak from direct experience.
For anybody reading this who is considering following James: know that you may end up seeing the absolute worst in yourself, and it will scar you AND THOSE YOU LOVE. Stay away from him. You will not depart from him without scars and regret.
I suppose that fact that he showed you your worst side can be seen as positive!
ReplyDeleteYes, this is true. It can be seen this way, in our case we were able to set ourselves free and learn from what had happened, but not all are fortunate enough to get this chance. Children who were in his care may have been damaged, they had no real choice and cannot escape, they have been engrained with his filth. For others they do not have the chance to escape, he has them in too deep. So before it sounds like he did us a favor, it's not like that.
ReplyDeleteOnly God can turn something evil into something good
I wonder what proxy server he uses. Maybe hidemyass.com?! ;D
ReplyDeleteThere are so many proxies. I don't think we could ever know which one he uses.
Deletebut yea hidemyass.com would be a good one... haha!
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